The "I Didn't Comment in Another Thread" Thread

[payn]

Sounds like you have awesome players.

 

[Ryujin]

Starting a new campaign soon, and one two of my players have now indicated that they want to play bards. Normally I would come here to vent about this absolute trainwreck waiting to happen, and Snarf would chime in and the two of us would commiserate about this ridiculous punchline of a character class...but Snarf is no longer here. I'll have to let bard memes do the mocking for me.

Yes yes, you're magically whimsical, and your superpower is being able to do all the things that nobody else cared enough about to bother learning. We can always count on you to bring levity and humor that nobody asked for, and to break everyone's concentration and derail a tense dialogue with a fart joke that isn't funny. Nobody can chew the scenery like you can, you clown, you strutting minstrel, you showboating hack. Please leave.

I hate bards so much.


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[CleverNickName]

Sounds like you have awesome players.

I do! It's just those two rotten apples that are going to spoil the whole campaign.

 

[eyeheartawk]

I do! It's just those two rotten apples that are going to spoil the whole campaign.

I would have loved to be in the room when you first read the PHB and then realized that the Lore Bard is the best class in that book.

What was it like?

 

[CleverNickName]

I would have loved to be in the room when you first read the PHB and then realized that the Lore Bard is the best class in that book.

What was it like?

Well, first of all, you misspelled "Tempest Cleric."

But yes, the Lore Bard is in the Player's Handbook. And when I realized that 5th Edition had decided Bard should still be its own class, instead of a subclass of Rogue (where it would at least fit in), my face looked something like this:

And then one of our players rolled one up, and I got a chance to see it in action. My face looked something like this:

But I've gotten over it in the years since. Now, whenever it's the bard's turn in combat, everyone just sits around and listens to their called action with the same expression on their faces:

 

[Gradine]

Well, first of all, you misspelled "Tempest Cleric."

And you misspelled "Knowledge", so silly

 

[eyeheartawk]

See, when I play a bard I like to ground it in reality.

So instead of a lute playing storyteller or whatever I go for "That one guy you know who is like, really into improv."

I'm really smart and cool.

 

[billd91]

Starting a new campaign soon, and one two of my players have now indicated that they want to play bards. Normally I would come here to vent about this absolute trainwreck waiting to happen, and Snarf would chime in and the two of us would commiserate about this ridiculous punchline of a character class...but Snarf is no longer here. I'll have to let bard memes do the mocking for me.

Yes yes, you're magically whimsical, and your superpower is being able to do all the things that nobody else cared enough about to bother learning. We can always count on you to bring levity and humor that nobody asked for, and to break everyone's concentration and derail a tense dialogue with a fart joke that isn't funny. Nobody can chew the scenery like you can, you clown, you strutting minstrel, you showboating hack. Please leave.

I hate bards so much.

Missed one (granted, it is from a previous edition):

 

[Ryujin]

See, when I play a bard I like to ground it in reality.

So instead of a lute playing storyteller or whatever I go for "That one guy you know who is like, really into improv."

I'm really smart and cool.

Not really having a flair for music I generally play a skill monkey, with a deep knowledge of history. Recounting epic history and mythology is something I can do.

Kabong El Kabong GIF - Kabong El Kabong Whack - Discover & Share GIFs

Click to view the GIF

tenor.com

 

[eyeheartawk]

Not really having a flair for music I generally play a skill monkey, with a deep knowledge of history. Recounting epic history and mythology is something I can do.

Kabong El Kabong GIF - Kabong El Kabong Whack - Discover & Share GIFs

Click to view the GIF

tenor.com

Good call.

Play what you know.

My future bard characters will just talk at people endlessly about Robocop.