1000 Signs you're in GM HELL

[Nuclear Platypus]

#230) You see a sign that says "Welcome to GM Hell. Population: You."

 

[ElvishBard]

#230) You see a sign that says "Welcome to GM Hell. Population: You."

231. You see that sign right after seeing a sign that says Leaving GM Hell. Population: You.

 

[BWP]

190. The party cleric, who is detrimental to the success of the adventure, dies in a minor encounter in the first combat
191. He announces that his character is happy with his god and is unwilling to be resed.

I do not think that word means what you think it means.

 

[spectre72]

232 The player of the parties only wizard falls asleep all of the time, only to awaken during combat and say "I fireball X" which unfortunately includes all of his companions along with the enemy.

233 The player of the parties only wizard falls asleep all of the time, only to awaken during a pivitol part of the adventure and does something stupid that allerts the Orc garrison because he was asleep while everyone else was making the plan to storm the Orc city.

234 Same player who falls asleep all of the time wakes up after a complex description of events going on and asks questions that were answered less than a minute ago while he was asleep.

Can you sense a trend here, and unfortunately it happens all the time..

Great friend, frustrating player

 

[DM-Rocco]

I do not think that word means what you think it means.

Well, I never, how dare you question me!

Let's see, Webster's Dictionary:
Main Entry: 1det·ri·men·tal
Pronunciation: "de-tr&-'men-t&l
Function: adjective
: obviously harmful : [size=-1]DAMAGING[/size] <the detrimental effects of pollution>
synonym see [size=-1]PERNICIOUS[/size]
- det·ri·men·tal·ly /-t&l-E/ adverb

Oops

How about necassary

 

[DungeonmasterCal]

There's a guy in my group who nearly always plays a cleric and he is clearly detrimental to the success of any adventure.

 

[Kae'Yoss]

215. Mr. Jack Daniels causes a player to roleplay her PC as a whore in the local tavern.

Isn't that the smart guy from StarGate?

0815: Players regularly have space problems in the "class" column of their sheet. They solve this by abbreviation (non-standard, and of course they forget what they mean) and leaving away class levels, since they never take more than one level in any class ("did you know that many classes have great abilities at first level?")

 

[Voadam]

236: player says "I have a wacky character concept, a demon lord trapped in the shape of a parrot who accompanies pirates . . ."

237: player's characterization of his deep gnome fighter PC "His name is 'doughboy' and he's a hip hop street thug."

238: You have a great idea for a setting tailored to the PCs character concepts and then when you start to run the game you blank on what to do after the first encounter is resolved.

239: A character's stats, hp, and equipment are all upgraded without DM permission between game sessions and the player does not think the DM will notice.

240: A PC "randomly" decides to dig in the northwest corner of a peasant's hut after murdering the peasant and denies having read the module which states the peasant had a stash of coins stored there.

241: using a new game system for the first time the PCs ask to use materials from a half dozen supplements, you mistakenly think it is no problem until their characters are made and you are part way into the game trying to run the unfamiliar system.

all true experiences

 

[DM-Rocco]

242. One of your player has every copy of Dungeon magazine and knows which adventure you are playing from Dungeon magazine by heart.

243. The other players don't know the adventure by heart, but each has it on .pdf which is on thier laptop.

 

[Chimera]

68. When your wife's PC dies during the session, she storms off shouting "I hope you weren't planning on getting some action the rest of the year!"

I'm not the GM, but something very similar happened in the last session of one of my games. The GM's wife threatened him with having an extremely bad week if something bad happened to her PC, which she had put into jeapardy. The game screeched to a halt until an old friend (I'm a relative newbie to the group) threatened to quit that game and the other game they played in, should any such favoratism occur.

Her character died. Entirely her fault. Of course, she was not pleased. Too bad.