1000 Things Your Characters do if They Have Deathwishes

[Halivar]

175. Upon having the dubious distinction of meeting Orcus in person, say to him, "Hey, fatty, what'd you do? Eat the Hostess Ho-Ho freakin' warehouse? If I had your obesity problem, I'd be hiding in the Abyss, too!"

176. If Orcus is dead, resurrect him to perform #175... just for laughs.

 

[Piratecat]

177. This is not made up.

In 1e, I knew someone who hated a campaign so much that he tried to kill off his PC by jumping off the edge of a 100'+ cliff. The awful DM gave him XP for killing a character of his level.

Are you seeing where this is going?

It was enough XP to raise him a level and boost his hit points. They rolled damage for the fall, and as a result of the extra hit points, the suicidal character wasn't killed!

 

[green slime]

177. This is not made up.

In 1e, I knew someone who hated a campaign so much that he tried to kill off his PC by jumping off the edge of a 100'+ cliff. The awful DM gave him XP for killing a character of his level.

Are you seeing where this is going?

It was enough XP to raise him a level and boost his hit points. They rolled damage for the fall, and as a result of the extra hit points, the suicidal character wasn't killed!

But then he shouldn't have earned the hp....?!?!?!?!? As he failed!!

 

[MarauderX]

178. Shake hands with a wight.

179. Hug your favorite arcane caster while she is summoning something...vicious.

180. Use a key to open a door...
PC1(wiz): I have the key, let's go in.
PC2(rogue): no, I should pick the lock, just in case it's an ambush.
PC3(fighter): It won't matter for an ambush; I charge the door to break it down.

181. Use two mysterious wands as chopsticks to eat.

 

[Avarice]

182. Tell your DM: "C'mon, we've been in this Myth Drannor place all day! When are we going to fight something?!"

 

[MarauderX]

183. Ask an Illithid if he is on a low-intellegence diet.

184. Give a necromancer holy water to drink.

185. Wearing boots of speed next to a cliff.

186. Attaching all of the party members together at the waist using rope.

187. Using acid on the barbarian to douse a fire.

188. "Death from above" the BBEG.

 

[yennico]

189. Kiss a succubus for several rounds

190. Call Tiamat a five-headed hydra.

Just my 2 cents
yennico

 

[Mark Chance]

191. Engage in faulty meta-game thinking: "C'mon, the DM wouldn't put in an encounter that we can't defeat!"

 

[yennico]

191. Engage in faulty meta-game thinking: "C'mon, the DM wouldn't put in an encounter that we can't defeat!"

reminds me of the last famous words: It could not be a red dragon, we are only 1st level PCs

Just my 2 cents
yennico

 

[demiurge1138]

192. Dive into dark pools to grab something shiny at the bottom.
193. Pirouette on a bannister over a deep dark pit to "prove that the staircase is sturdy".
194. Try to ride a broom of flying when you're twice its weight limit.
195. Lick a carved obsidian anything.
196. Call a pit fiend "Molly Milkpants".
197. Try to infiltrate an army of weredilophosaurs.
198. Throw yourself off an airship to escape an enemy, trusting in your skill with a grappling hook to get back on.
199. Try to parley with a crime lord while he's in the bathroom.

If you couldn't tell, these were all done by the same player. He survived some of them. He was not so lucky with others.