My first attempt used the CHA-based save DC standard to enchantment type effects, but that was only DC 9 which seemed way too low so I made it DEX-based on the basis that it's a motion-based ability. Thought about a WIS-based DC 12, but that didn't make much sense to me, and having the CHA-based DC 9 with disadvantage if being viewed with darkvision, but to do that I'd have to make the phrasing more complicated and it didn't seem worth it.
Further on that, I'm still liking the idea of the
Hypnotic Wings being more effective against creatures with darkvision, so how about we particularly persecute drow by adding "
If a creature has Fey Ancestry and sees the Hypnotic Wings with darkvision, the trait does not give the creature advantage on saving throws against being charmed by the wings."
I also mused about including other advantageous traits, e.g. "
If a creature has Fey Ancestry or Magic Resistance and sees the Hypnotic Wings with darkvision, the traits do not give the creature advantage on saving throws against being charmed by the wings." That felt like going too far though.
The only question is where do I stick the sentence in!
Tag it on the end as a separate parapraph?
Hypnotic Wings #A. The mammoth underdark damselfly swirls its wings in a hypnotic pattern. Every creature within 300 feet of the damselfly that can see the wings and is not another underdark damselfly must succeed on a DC 14 Wisdom saving throw or be charmed until the wings' motion ends. The mammoth underdark damselfly must take a bonus action on its subsequent turns to continue the hypnotic motion. It can stop its hypnotism at any time. The hypnotism ends if the damselfly is incapacitated or flies more than 60 feet on its turn (including any distance it moves with Dashing Flight or Dodging Flight). While charmed by the mammoth underdark damselfly, a creature is incapacitated and does nothing but stare mesmerized at the insect. The hypnosis effect ends if the target takes any damage from the mammoth underdark damselfly. If a charmed creature takes damage from a source other than the damselfly or is about to face another obvious danger, such as an approaching fire, it can repeat the saving throw. A charmed creature can also repeat the saving throw at the end of each of its turns. If the saving throw is successful, the effect ends on it. A creature that successfully saves is able to resist the hypnotism for the next 24 hours. If the creature fails a saving throw during their period of resistance against the mammoth underdark damselfly's Hypnotic Wings, it is only partially charmed and may target the damselfly with harmful abilities or magical effects. Instead of being incapacitated, a partially charmed creature has disadvantage on attack rolls and skill checks, and the mammoth underdark damselfly has advantage on attack rolls against the partially charmed creature.
If a creature has Fey Ancestry and sees the Hypnotic Wings with darkvision, the trait does not give the creature advantage on saving throws against being charmed by the wings.
Stick it in the middle as a separate paragraph?
Hypnotic Wings #B. The mammoth underdark damselfly swirls its wings in a hypnotic pattern. Every creature within 300 feet of the damselfly that can see the wings and is not another underdark damselfly must succeed on a DC 14 Wisdom saving throw or be charmed until the wings' motion ends.
If a creature has Fey Ancestry and sees the Hypnotic Wings with darkvision, the trait does not give the creature advantage on saving throws against being charmed by the wings.
The mammoth underdark damselfly must take a bonus action on its subsequent turns to continue the hypnotic motion. It can stop its hypnotism at any time. The hypnotism ends if the damselfly is incapacitated or flies more than 60 feet on its turn (including any distance it moves with Dashing Flight or Dodging Flight). While charmed by the mammoth underdark damselfly, a creature is incapacitated and does nothing but stare mesmerized at the insect. The hypnosis effect ends if the target takes any damage from the mammoth underdark damselfly. If a charmed creature takes damage from a source other than the damselfly or is about to face another obvious danger, such as an approaching fire, it can repeat the saving throw. A charmed creature can also repeat the saving throw at the end of each of its turns. If the saving throw is successful, the effect ends on it. A creature that successfully saves is able to resist the hypnotism for the next 24 hours. If the creature fails a saving throw during their period of resistance against the mammoth underdark damselfly's Hypnotic Wings, it is only partially charmed and may target the damselfly with harmful abilities or magical effects. Instead of being incapacitated, a partially charmed creature has disadvantage on attack rolls and skill checks, and the mammoth underdark damselfly has advantage on attack rolls against the partially charmed creature.
Merge them together?
Hypnotic Wings #C. The mammoth underdark damselfly swirls its wings in a hypnotic pattern. Every creature within 300 feet of the damselfly that can see the wings and is not another underdark damselfly must succeed on a DC 14 Wisdom saving throw or be charmed until the wings' motion ends. If a creature has Fey Ancestry and sees the Hypnotic Wings with darkvision, the trait does not give the creature advantage on saving throws against being charmed by the wings. The mammoth underdark damselfly must take a bonus action on its subsequent turns to continue the hypnotic motion. It can stop its hypnotism at any time. The hypnotism ends if the damselfly is incapacitated or flies more than 60 feet on its turn (including any distance it moves with Dashing Flight or Dodging Flight). While charmed by the mammoth underdark damselfly, a creature is incapacitated and does nothing but stare mesmerized at the insect. The hypnosis effect ends if the target takes any damage from the mammoth underdark damselfly. If a charmed creature takes damage from a source other than the damselfly or is about to face another obvious danger, such as an approaching fire, it can repeat the saving throw. A charmed creature can also repeat the saving throw at the end of each of its turns. If the saving throw is successful, the effect ends on it. A creature that successfully saves is able to resist the hypnotism for the next 24 hours. If the creature fails a saving throw during their period of resistance against the mammoth underdark damselfly's Hypnotic Wings, it is only partially charmed and may target the damselfly with harmful abilities or magical effects. Instead of being incapacitated, a partially charmed creature has disadvantage on attack rolls and skill checks, and the mammoth underdark damselfly has advantage on attack rolls against the partially charmed creature.
Or do it as two paragraphs, with the additional sentence at the end of the first?
Hypnotic Wings #D. The mammoth underdark damselfly swirls its wings in a hypnotic pattern. Every creature within 300 feet of the damselfly that can see the wings and is not another underdark damselfly must succeed on a DC 14 Wisdom saving throw or be charmed until the wings' motion ends. If a creature has Fey Ancestry and sees the Hypnotic Wings with darkvision, the trait does not give the creature advantage on saving throws against being charmed by the wings.
The mammoth underdark damselfly must take a bonus action on its subsequent turns to continue the hypnotic motion. It can stop its hypnotism at any time. The hypnotism ends if the damselfly is incapacitated or flies more than 60 feet on its turn (including any distance it moves with Dashing Flight or Dodging Flight). While charmed by the mammoth underdark damselfly, a creature is incapacitated and does nothing but stare mesmerized at the insect. The hypnosis effect ends if the target takes any damage from the mammoth underdark damselfly. If a charmed creature takes damage from a source other than the damselfly or is about to face another obvious danger, such as an approaching fire, it can repeat the saving throw. A charmed creature can also repeat the saving throw at the end of each of its turns. If the saving throw is successful, the effect ends on it. A creature that successfully saves is able to resist the hypnotism for the next 24 hours. If the creature fails a saving throw during their period of resistance against the mammoth underdark damselfly's Hypnotic Wings, it is only partially charmed and may target the damselfly with harmful abilities or magical effects. Instead of being incapacitated, a partially charmed creature has disadvantage on attack rolls and skill checks, and the mammoth underdark damselfly has advantage on attack rolls against the partially charmed creature.
Hmm… the first two look a bit clunky but
#C and
#D are alright.
Any preferences?
If not, I'll go for
Hypnotic Wings #D.