Paul Farquhar
Legend
Be less abrasive?What, exactly, was I supposed to do better/different?
Be less abrasive?What, exactly, was I supposed to do better/different?
Generally, when that happens, I sit down with the player and ask them exactly what they want the character to be. If they have a clear picture, then we can hammer together some options. If they don't have a coherent image of what they want, then quite frankly they're looking for options for the wrong reason.It's been a mixed success so far. One player took a 3pp class (kibblestasty's Warlord), but one of the others has spent weeks trawling the wilder and less-credible corners of the D&D internet trying to find the absolutely perfect homebrew subclass, and then trying to talk me into modifying it just a little bit more.
And I suspect there is a very strong correlation between how much 3PP is allowed and how well the players know each other in the group.
I played a bunch of pbp games here in the 3e era with people I don't know outside of ENworld. Games ran the gamut of core only, WotC only, and 3pp allowed. I got to play in games where I used stuff from Mythic Races, Complete Book of Eldritch Might, Arcana Unearthed, Unholy Warriors Handbook, an Acrobat class from a Fantasy Flight Games book, and some other OGL player stuff. I don't think it was based on trust in me.That's nonsense. It's only been possible to play with strangers over the internet for a couple of years. It's hardly reasonable to expect a game that is about to cerebrate it's 50th anniversary to have been designed with that in mind. D&D, like the vast majority of boardgames, was designed to be played with friends. It's hardly the game designer's problem if you don't have any.
There is a reason I put "5e Players," rather than "5e DMs."Not sure how to answer this based on the games I run. I generally like my players to stick to official content where possible, for a number of reasons. However, I DM in Eberron a lot, and I allow any and all Keith Baker Publications material, and that's 3PP. So my answer is, "I don't allow most 3PP material, but most of my games I allow some specific 3PP material."
But it does feel like a very important distinction. Does your poll give you the data you are looking for if someone answers "Very frequently / always" when their overall policy is saying NO to any 3PP beyond a single exception?I don't care whether there are filters in place for limiting some 3PP, even if it's "essentially everything is forbidden with extreme prejudice, except <X approved thing>." As long as a game permits even one piece of 3PP, it would count toward that player getting to use 3PP.
I am giving maximum credence to the claim (as noted, made by someone on this forum) that it is shocking to hear that, as a player, one has essentially never been permitted to use any 3PP.But it does feel like a very important distinction. Does your poll give you the data you are looking for if the answer is "Always one publisher, but never any others?"
If yes, then okay. But I would personally rate groups that have such a policy as "Very rarely/never."
Then I will go ahead and use Very Frequently / Always as my official vote since the majority of Critical Role material is 3PP.I am giving maximum credence to the claim (as noted, made by someone on this forum) that it is shocking to hear that, as a player, one has essentially never been permitted to use any 3PP.
Hence, to allow even a single piece, no matter how limited or partial, would qualify.
I tried forums (four different ones, including ENWorld), I tried PbP, I tried Roll20 and one of its competitors that I no longer remember the name of (mostly because it was a complete dud), I tried pitching concepts, I tried Reddit, I tried Discord. (Discord produces a lot of games, but not a lot of hits, if you get my meaning.) Started out looking for 4e, loosened that to 4e-adjacent (e.g. 13A), loosened that to other systems I wanted to see (e.g. Shadowrun 5e), loosened it again to "alright anything that isn't D&D 5e that I've actually heard of, and isn't a horror game," then to "alright, fine, I guess I'll look at 5e games and be picky about them," and finally to just looking for any 5e game that might, possibly, maybe play like something I could enjoy.
What, exactly, was I supposed to do better/different? I haven't the money to pay to play, nor would I do so even if I could. I don't have reliable transportation, and even if I did I have terrible social anxiety, so physical in-person games are essentially impossible for me (doubly so once the pandemic hit).
I tried. I got nothing, out of more than a year of searching, regularly, multiple times a week, consistently. Applying to at least one game every week, consistently. The games I got into? They died before they hit six sessions (or the equivalent for PbP.) Often before they even hit four. I put up "looking for DM" pitches. Zero replies. I entered my name in "player looking for group" lists. Zero messages. I even rustled up a group of folks I knew from various forums, but we...didn't gel, shall we say.
And all of this was after I'd already found and lost two actually fun, great groups, the former (4e D&D) to IRL family disaster taking the DM away, the latter (13A) due to the PbP DM ghosting us right as our adventure was about to go somewhere new.
I tried.
Wasn't Hell no. But I would not be surprised by such a response. Myself as DM I would certainly consider it and might allow it if the player was sincere, mature, and understood that we might have to change it in the future if it proved to not be a good fit.How about if you were working with a new group for whatever reason? Not a one-shot, something intended to be longer-term. E.g. let's say you have an acquaintance (not exactly a friend, but someone you've met and got along with) who got a wild hair and decided to run a new 5e game, and felt you would be a good fit for it.
Would you expect such a "hell no" response?

(Dungeons & Dragons)
Rulebook featuring "high magic" options, including a host of new spells.