BLEB1: Beer Run (stonegod - Designated Driver)


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"Jolly!" Kenn enthuses. "A special train? If our trainmates don't object, I'm all for it. I just need to visit a news-stand and find a Baedekers guide for my luggage. Magister Kuther?"
 

ajanders said:
"Jolly!" Kenn enthuses. "A special train? If our trainmates don't object, I'm all for it. I just need to visit a news-stand and find a Baedekers guide for my luggage. Magister Kuther?"
OOC: Aren't the Wayfinder Guide's much more accurate? "Where's this Germany place, anyway? Karrnath?" :)
 

"Yup, it'll be right over there by gate 13. Of course, I need to let them know right away. That'll be 2,000 gold please."
 

Two thousand gold. And that's less than half the way. For some beer? nah, we must be smuggling something else in breland. I'll have to have a look at these barrels...

Lost in these thoughts, Tam follows the group to the special train.
 

Wait. We're talking about Karrnath! They use zombies and skeletons and such. What if they make the beer with PEOPLE?!? Would they call it... Soylent beer? I wonder how it tastes. Probably varies with the person.
 


Kenn cheerfully purchases a Wayfarer's Guide, which he has called Baedeker's after a very good friend of his in Cyre (named Baedeker) who did a good bit of writing for them. He looks indecisively at a taroc deck and a travel chess set, but decides not to.
Perhaps I'll start a journal again. It's not like I'm going to get the old ones back.
He does, actually, take a moment to look at journals and pens.

Less cheerfully, Kenn ambles towards a cafe where he can watch platform 13, where he understands their train is going to appear. Sometimes memories are a heavy burden to bear.

He orders strong tea and settles down to read the two most relevant sections of the Wayfarer's guide, which he titles in his head as "How not to Join the Karnathi Army" and "How to be Dull and Orthodox in Thrane" Basically, he wants to know laws and entry requirements.

Here's hoping nobody remembers me...
 

OOC: Man, oh man. This sprung up fully formed in my mind after reading ajanders post.

[sblock=How Not to Join the Karnnathi Army]The Karrns are well known for their alternative form of militia, formed mostly of the reanimated dead of their countrymen. While this has the advantage of reducing the costs associated with the maintenance of such a force, it does pose a dreadful concern to those traveling to the cold nation that such an unfortunate fate might befall them. If one takes care and follows these handy tips, the Wayfairers can almost guarantee that you will not be press-ganged into the Karnnathi Army.

1. Don't Die As undead armies are formed from the corpses of the formerly living, as long as you maintain your living state, you are safe from any eternal indenture to the Karrnaithi services. Of course, this advice only works if you are currently living. If you are warforged, you may wish to consult our 'How to Avoid Becoming a Thranish or Karrnathi Indentured Warforged' pamplet.

2. Don't Leave a Corpse While there are some nastier forms of undead that do not possess a corporeal shell, the majority of the Karnnathi armed forces consists of solid forces. Thus, if you find yourself on the brink of death and are concerned about a post-mortem military commitment, dispose of your body the best you can. A convenient high waterfall, a pyre, an acidic vat, or a hungry collection of wild beasts should help prevent any trace of your remains being salvageable. If these options are not available, attempt to decapitate yourself or amputate several limbs to make your body less servicable.

3. Avoid Karrnathi Temples The Karrns are well known for (formerly) putting forth the believe that the mortal coil is inferior due to its proclivity for dying and thus intelligent undead are superior due to the immortality of their essence. Thus, you want to avoid any temples not clearly identified as belonging to the Sovereign Host or the Silver Flame to avoid any unfortunate misunderstanding. If you find yourself, however, caught within one of the religious devotions of such a sect, please consult the Wayfinder's pamphlet on 'How to Surivive a Ritual Sacrifice'.[/sblock]
 

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