D&D has threatened my job!

[Hand of Evil]

A friend of mine does a release form.

 

[Charles Dunwoody]

I'm actually surprised that you tried to do anything with minors without the knowledge of their parents. I have to back up the mom on this one. What you describe sounds creepy to me even though I love D&D.

I've been gaming for over twenty years. I've been a parent for two years. I don't leave my child with any adult, anywhere, unless I know about it and approve it. I don't care if it is to play D&D or to help out at a nursing home.

Frankly, I worry every day about whether my son is safe. That's my most important job and far outweighs the need of any DM for players.

As a teacher, you should set an example for kids. Children should always let their parents know where they are and who they are with, especially when with adults.

I love D&D but if I found out a teacher was DMing for my son without my knowledge I'd complain too. It is irresponsible.

I've volunteered for Junior Achievement, which is an organization that arranges for business people go into schools and present a business class to students. They have a strict policy: no instructor meets with any student outside of the class. Period. And I totally agree with that rule. Keeps the kids safe, and I'll always err on the side of the kids.

I think you need to go back to playing games with adults. Let kids play with other kids, their parents, or friends of their parents.

 

[Host of Angels]

As a fellow Brit I agree to a certain extent; the situation certainly is not as bad, and I also think there is the chance that D&D is becoming mainstream enough that it will never become endemic to the hobby over here. (clipped)

Let's just hope that it goes that way - I wish I shared your optimism...

 

[Piratecat]

Yup, in your shoes I think I'd worry a lot less about what is fair in favor for making sure that all parents felt secure. To that end, I'd involve parents as much as possible and use both permission forms and public venues.

 

[Psion]

Reminds me of high school...

One of our GMs... and a frequent host for Friday night games... was a library assistant in the high school I went to (she also let us use the library copier to copy Star Fleet Battles SSD )

One time she related how she had been approached by someone in her family who advised her it was not a good idea to have sex with young boys.

I guess someone had been leaping to conclusions about all the male visitors who visited her house every weekend.

 

[Steel_Wind]

I have a unique perspective here - I am a lawyer and a high school history teacher. I gave up my law practice to go into teaching and coaching. Still have a couple of near and dear clients and maintain the ole' law license, because you never know.

There is no question your principal did you a huge favor. Frankly, the vast majority of administrators would say "get those kids out of your game now."

That is my advice BTW - get those kids out of your game now. You know as well as I do parent complaints are what drive administrators. The impression of others in your school system that you are weird may not bother you, but politically that is not a solid position. When RIFs come down administrators make an effort to lose troublesome teachers. They change job descriptions or slide positions and unless you have a lot of tenure in the district you're on the outs.

Missouri unions are not as powerful as ours in Illinois, but you need to make your rep aware of the meeting with your principal via written letter. Create a paper trail to save any possible recourse you may choose to take later.

Finally, sadly, I must advise you to drop the kids from your game. I know when I was hurting for players a few years ago I was sorely tempted to allow some seniors to play in my campaign. Politically though, I knew it put me in a bad position. Picture yourself defending yourself before the school board - would they agree there is nothing strange about a teacher playing D&D with high school students? You know the answer - sad as it is. Be smart.

I'm not a teacher - but I am a lawyer, and the above was excellent advice. Send him a cheque.

I know you did not want to hear that advice - but you should follow it. Get the kids out of your game. Or get out of your small town to a place where you can find more players so you don't have to do this.

He's right. Be smart.

 

[WizarDru]

I'm not a lawyer, but I am a parent. Take my ideas with a grain of salt.

1.) A Sanctioned Group - Establish a wider interest group, such as a Board Game Club or Tactics and Studies group, and fold D&D into it. Putting D&D as just one game among many, and playing other games such as 'Ticket to Ride', for example, is a good way to contextualize the game. Have the parents sign permission forms for membership.

2.) A Public Place - Limited hours are better than no hours at all. In this age of sexual predators and drug dealers, parents are going to be reasonably suspicious of a teacher who meets his students out of school at his home. You have to remember, you're not playing a game of all minors: you're running a game with several other adults present. It doesn't matter if you were playing D&D or teaching them to juggle: a parent who is concerned about their children's activities will be uncomfortable with that situation, if they don't personally know you. I have three words for you that are certainly fresh in some parents' minds: Mary Kay Letourneau.


3.) Parental Involvement - Send information packets home to parents. Invite them to attend and witness games. Offer to hold a 'parent' information night. Make the parents comfortable with you and the game in general.

Personally, I think you need to segregate your games into two groups...minors and adults. You need to approach them differently, and move forward differently. Those parents may not be small-minded...they may just be cautious parents. Either way, your situation make this a matter you should approach with some delicacy, IMHO.

 

[diaglo]

i'm not a lawyer or parent. i'm a lab rat. i'll give you some advice my grandmother gave me.

don't s**t where you eat.

right or wrong. fraternization is a no no in some fields. the military still doesn't allow it.

 

[Faerl'Elghinn]

Just to be on the safe side, I wouldn't let any of your players name their rogue "Black Leaf."

 

[DungeonmasterCal]

I live in a small town compared to many, but here in Arkansas, it's a fairly decently sized city. Recently I spoke to a teacher from one of the high schools who plays D&D (never caught his name, but we were standing in a bookstore discussing Eberron), and he was put on probation for running an after school D&D game. He's even had to stop discussing his hobby with fellow teachers, because twice he's been called to his principal's office to explain his "obsession".

sigh......