Dice Action Camera players in sex scandal!

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Yaarel

Adventurer
Heh, I distrust the justice system. Unfair outcomes happen all the time.

But trial by public opinion is so many times worse.
 

tglassy

Explorer
As to the second point of the morality of an ‘affair’ (a fairly outmoded expression) and the sharing of naked imagery between consenting adults. I don’t really think it’s appropriate in the rpg gaming community, to comment on what a person does or doesn’t do with their partner, monogamous or otherwise. The days of vilifying people for not conforming to sexual norms should be a thing best left to the Victorian era.

There is only one reasonable response to a person who claims they have been abused... commend them for their bravery; urge them to go to the authorities and then signpost them to support. Trying this in the court of public opinion can only be a bad thing.
This is, unfortunately, the direction our society has gone, and I don’t believe we quite understand the ramifications of thinking this way. Since the sexual revolution, sex has become “personal” and “none of anyone else’s business.” It has become a situation where we believe we have the right to do as we please, because we are adults. Marriage has been blasted as being outdated, secular scientists have come out saying human beings are not naturally monogamous, open relationships have become more and more common. And you might actually believe all this is a good thing, but here is the issue.

Do not commit adultery, or do not sleep with someone you are not married to, is an old rule many believe to be prudish and outdated. Since the sixties, we have worked very hard to make this rule out to have no place in modern times, that people should be allowed to sleep with whoever they want as long as it’s consensual. But imagine, if you will, what would happen if every person took this one rule to heart.

There would be no STDs. No fatherless children or single mothers, except by death of the father. No heartbreak from infidelity. No broken homes due to infidelity. No sexual harassment cases. No need for a MeToo movement. No men of power taking advantage of those under their power for sexual favors. No sex scandals. No rape. More equality for women. 80% fewer abortions, as only 20% of abortions are from married women. No porn industry, which promotes the objectification and enslavement of women for the pleasure of others.

Sure, you can argue that that would be a perfect world and isn’t based in reality, but it boils down to individual choice, and each individual has the ability to choose not to engage in sexual activity with anyone but their spouse. If sex were consigned to marriage, and marriage alone, a large portion of society’s problems would simply go away. The sexual revolution wanted free love, but all it did was make it cheap. Married people, on average, have more sex and better sex over the course of their life. In my opinion, it is much better for society as a whole to make things like what this article is talking about very, very NOT ok with society. This sort of behavior should not be tolerated, in ourselves or in others. We’ve tried the whole ‘sexual revolution free love’ thing, and it gave us the MeToo movement, a legitimized porn industry, 1.5 million abortions a year, an uptick in single mothers and teen pregnancies, and provides an ample playground for STD’s to spread. This is what happens when you view sex as simply a fun act between consensual adults. Maybe it would be a good idea to be a little more prudish in our opinion of sex.
 
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TwoSix

Lover of things you hate
This is, unfortunately, the direction our society has gone, and I don’t believe we quite understand the ramifications of thinking this way. Since the sexual revolution, sex has become “personal” and “none of anyone else’s business.” It has become a situation where we believe we have the right to do as we please, because we are adults. Marriage has been blasted as being outdated, secular scientists have come out saying human beings are not naturally monogamous, open relationships have become more and more common. And you might actually believe all this is a good thing, but here is the issue.

Do not commit adultery, or do not sleep with someone you are not married to, is an old rule many believe to be prudish and outdated. Since the sixties, we have worked very hard to make this rule out to have no place in modern times, that people should be allowed to sleep with whoever they want as long as it’s consensual. But imagine, if you will, what would happen if every person took this one rule to heart.

There would be no STDs. No fatherless children or single mothers, except by death of the father. No heartbreak from infidelity. No broken homes due to infidelity. No sexual harassment cases. No need for a MeToo movement. No men of power taking advantage of those under their power for sexual favors. No sex scandals. No rape. More equality for women. 80% fewer abortions, as only 20% of abortions are from married women. No porn industry, which promotes the objectification and enslavement of women for the pleasure of others.

Sure, you can argue that that would be a perfect world and isn’t based in reality, but it boils down to individual choice, and each individual has the ability to choose not to engage in sexual activity with anyone but their wife. If sex were consigned to marriage, and marriage alone, a large portion of society’s problems would simply go away. The sexual revolution wanted free love, but all it did was make it cheap. Married people, on average, have more sex and better sex over the course of their life. In my opinion, it is much better for society as a whole to make things like what this article is talking about very, very NOT ok with society. This sort of behavior should not be tolerated, in ourselves or in others. We’ve tried the whole ‘sexual revolution free love’ thing, and it gave us the MeToo movement, a legitimized porn industry, 1.5 million abortions a year, an uptick in single mothers and teen pregnancies, and provides an ample playground for STD’s to spread. This is what happens when you view sex as simply a fun act between consensual adults. Maybe it would be a good idea to be a little more prudish in our opinion of sex.
Nah.
 

Mirtek

Explorer
If sex were consigned to marriage, and marriage alone, a large portion of society’s problems would simply go away..
Yes, Sure. Because there ever has been a single period during which this actually worked.

Even during the most prudish times what the people said as a society and what the truly did in private never matched up.
 

tglassy

Explorer
Sure. Except that then, there was the deterrent of being ostracized by society if you were caught. If it happened, which of course it did, it was kept private. Once it is legitimized, it becomes rampant. Like I said, a flourishing porn industry, rampant STD's, broken homes left and right, 1.5 million abortions a year. These things wouldn't go away, but they would be minimized to a fraction of their current levels. Simply making it ok to sleep with whoever you want to, because "well, people will just do it in secret" is a horrible solution.
 

TheSword

Explorer
tglassy said:
Not repeating TL.
This is wrong on so many levels.

Abuse happens all too often within the institution of Marriage.

Really this was just a long list of bad reasons to lock people into unhappiness.

The perfect illustration of why we don’t allow the general public to take the law into their own hands outside of a formal jury.
 

tglassy

Explorer
In the end, it comes down to a personal choice. Every person has the ability to choose not to engage in sexual activity until they are willing/able to commit to marriage. By choosing not to do so, they become part of the problem. By choosing to do so, they become part of the solution. If they believe that getting their jollies off is more important to them than doing their part to fix society, then that's on them. We have a horrible problem today with people not being able to consider the consequences of their actions, and wanting instant gratification, letting 'future me' deal with that issue. And the MeToo movement is a result of that. I'm just saying the solution is not so far out of the box as to be impossible.
 

tglassy

Explorer
This is wrong on so many levels.


Abuse happens all too often within the institution of Marriage.


Really this was just a long list of bad reasons to lock people into unhappiness.


The perfect illustration of why we don’t allow the general public to take the law into their own hands outside of a formal jury.
This is a misnomer. The vast majority of domestic violence cases, up to 80%, happen between unmarried couples. Yeah, there are those who abuse their spouse, but it is at a much smaller number than the media would have people believe.
 

Radaceus

Villager
Regarding the extramarital affair, I'm not the least bit surprised. At this point, who hasn't seen a D&D group fall apart due to extramarital bonking? It happens all the time, and why not? When men and women get together, they bonk. That's just the way it is. Bonk, bonk, bonk.
*raises hand*
*raise hand also*

40 odd years and no extramarital bonking, outside of game. In game, yes, there have been betrayals of all types...
 

TwoSix

Lover of things you hate
Sure. Except that then, there was the deterrent of being ostracized by society if you were caught. If it happened, which of course it did, it was kept private. Once it is legitimized, it becomes rampant. Like I said, a flourishing porn industry, rampant STD's, broken homes left and right, 1.5 million abortions a year. These things wouldn't go away, but they would be minimized to a fraction of their current levels. Simply making it ok to sleep with whoever you want to, because "well, people will just do it in secret" is a horrible solution.
1) A flourishing porn industry is much more a function of a technological change than a change in societal mores. And I doubt most people actually working in the industry would say it's "flourishing".
2) Ostracization and shame rarely channel people in positive directions. And the primary flaw in the pre-60s attitudes was that the ostracization and shame was rarely applied equally, but fell disproportionately on women, who already suffer disproportionately from the consequences of sex.

Honestly, I'm really not sure what sort of policy you're proposing here. I'm not a libertarian "do as thou wilt" type, but turning the clock back on the sexual revolution doesn't seem like a feasible approach. I certainly wouldn't want my children to feel like hooking up after prom might lead to a shotgun wedding and/or a jail term.
 

TwoSix

Lover of things you hate
Regarding the extramarital affair, I'm not the least bit surprised. At this point, who hasn't seen a D&D group fall apart due to extramarital bonking? It happens all the time, and why not? When men and women get together, they bonk. That's just the way it is. Bonk, bonk, bonk.
Not recently, but I certainly remember groups in college having issues due to some extracurricular bonking.

And also, thanks for reminding me of how awesome "bonk" is as an euphemism. That's slipped out of my vocabulary, and now I'm going to bring it back! :)
 

TwoSix

Lover of things you hate
This is a misnomer. The vast majority of domestic violence cases, up to 80%, happen between unmarried couples. Yeah, there are those who abuse their spouse, but it is at a much smaller number than the media would have people believe.
Sure, but a lot of those people would have been married to each other in our previous, more restrictive, era.

There's a lot of self-selection going on now, as people who are married now tend to be more stable and family oriented, as that's why they made the choice to be married. The act of marriage, in and of itself, doesn't make people more stable and family-oriented. (See the OP for an example!)
 

cmad1977

Adventurer
This is, unfortunately, the direction our society has gone, and I don’t believe we quite understand the ramifications of thinking this way. Since the sexual revolution, sex has become “personal” and “none of anyone else’s business.” It has become a situation where we believe we have the right to do as we please, because we are adults. Marriage has been blasted as being outdated, secular scientists have come out saying human beings are not naturally monogamous, open relationships have become more and more common. And you might actually believe all this is a good thing, but here is the issue.

Do not commit adultery, or do not sleep with someone you are not married to, is an old rule many believe to be prudish and outdated. Since the sixties, we have worked very hard to make this rule out to have no place in modern times, that people should be allowed to sleep with whoever they want as long as it’s consensual. But imagine, if you will, what would happen if every person took this one rule to heart.

There would be no STDs. No fatherless children or single mothers, except by death of the father. No heartbreak from infidelity. No broken homes due to infidelity. No sexual harassment cases. No need for a MeToo movement. No men of power taking advantage of those under their power for sexual favors. No sex scandals. No rape. More equality for women. 80% fewer abortions, as only 20% of abortions are from married women. No porn industry, which promotes the objectification and enslavement of women for the pleasure of others.

Sure, you can argue that that would be a perfect world and isn’t based in reality, but it boils down to individual choice, and each individual has the ability to choose not to engage in sexual activity with anyone but their spouse. If sex were consigned to marriage, and marriage alone, a large portion of society’s problems would simply go away. The sexual revolution wanted free love, but all it did was make it cheap. Married people, on average, have more sex and better sex over the course of their life. In my opinion, it is much better for society as a whole to make things like what this article is talking about very, very NOT ok with society. This sort of behavior should not be tolerated, in ourselves or in others. We’ve tried the whole ‘sexual revolution free love’ thing, and it gave us the MeToo movement, a legitimized porn industry, 1.5 million abortions a year, an uptick in single mothers and teen pregnancies, and provides an ample playground for STD’s to spread. This is what happens when you view sex as simply a fun act between consensual adults. Maybe it would be a good idea to be a little more prudish in our opinion of sex.
Never make Int the dump stat kids.
 

Scott Graves

Villager
The whole point of the #metoo movement completely passed you by, didn’t it? Do you know how many reports of harassment and assault result in nothing? Just in the past month, two men raped teenage girls and got probation for it. That’s it.

Several women came forth and said they got unwanted pics from him, and him asking for theirs in return. Some of these women were under age. Girls. How do you think they all got pictures and screen shots of the texts? Many of these women only came forward because it became public. No offense, but posts like yours are part of the problem because it keeps behavior like his in the shadows where men like him keep doing it because they don’t get held accountable for it. Much of what he did was not a crime, but reprehensible regardless. So unless all of these women are lying, there is a legitimate cause to have public pressure to have him removed from the industry as a representative of said industry.

Sorry, this public discussion is necessary, and it’s not “outdated Victorian sexual norms”. Harassment is never warranted. If this didn’t become public, most of these women and girls would never have their story known and he’d keep getting away with his abhorrent behavior. Men sending unsolicited dick pics to women is not a tabloid. It’s an all too common occurrence that needs to stop. And attitudes like yours that advocate ignoring it unless it’s an actual crime are part of the problem that enables men to keep doing things like this.
I think you are wandering into the political here because not everyone is going to agree with you on your points and I think personally that the internet is magnifying problems well out of proportion to reality. Your post is a fine example of how that happens.
 

Scott Graves

Villager
Sure. Except that then, there was the deterrent of being ostracized by society if you were caught. If it happened, which of course it did, it was kept private. Once it is legitimized, it becomes rampant. Like I said, a flourishing porn industry, rampant STD's, broken homes left and right, 1.5 million abortions a year. These things wouldn't go away, but they would be minimized to a fraction of their current levels. Simply making it ok to sleep with whoever you want to, because "well, people will just do it in secret" is a horrible solution.
Unfortunately the genie is out of that bottle and it ain't going back in. We've devolved socially to our most base animal instincts when it comes to matters of intercourse. Lets just hope we don't devolve much more in the rest of our personal interactions or punching people in the face over the slightest disagreement will become the norm. We've already started down that path come to think of it...
 

Scott Graves

Villager
Because we as a society have a vested interest in knowing when people are doing illegal things and ya know, punishing them for it?

I mean, that's why we have public police forces right? Because society determined some things aren't cool and ought to be dealt with?

Jesus these sorts of posts are just so stupid. "Why should anyone else care when a famous person is doing nasty things!" Like really? Do you not understand how society functions? No, I suppose you probably don't. I mean, or you do and you're just one of those edgy folks who thinks society shouldn't function as it has for thousands of years because of whatever moronic ideology you happen to buy into.
Things that happen in your circle of friends and family have an impact on you and thus you should be concerned about them. Things that happen to people you do not know, will likely never meet and who wouldn't urinate on you if you were on fire don't have an impact on you and thus you shouldn't care one way or the other. The internet and tabloid journalism has created a situation where we can imagine that we know these people and thus imagine that their lives have an impact on ours. But they don't. They may as well be on another planet. All you do by getting worked up over the lives of these people is give yourself another reason to feel stressed out. That's not healthy for you.
 

tglassy

Explorer
Sure, but a lot of those people would have been married to each other in our previous, more restrictive, era.

There's a lot of self-selection going on now, as people who are married now tend to be more stable and family oriented, as that's why they made the choice to be married. The act of marriage, in and of itself, doesn't make people more stable and family-oriented. (See the OP for an example!)
I wouldn't necessarily agree with the first point, as while the divorce rate has been going down, it's still between 40% and 50%. Marriage should always be carefully considered. I think this is why, in times past, a girl's parents had more say in who she married. it wasn't because the parents, usually the father, wanted something out of it, it was because they didn't trust a teenager to know who would be able to take care of her, and they wanted to make sure she was with someone who would treat her right. Sure, you had the fathers who married their daughters off for their own gain, but that wasn't the reason for the practice and outside royalty or politics, wasn't usually done.

As for the second point, that's true, but again marriage needs to be a choice that was well thought out and considered for all the ramifications. You are binding yourself to another person, at least legally if you don't believe spiritually. That shouldn't be something you just end because you can't get along. If you're not willing to change and adapt to this other person, or the thought of "well, i could just divorce them if I don't like them in ten years" is crossing your mind as you're saying your vows, then maybe marriage isn't for you, at least not at this time. You should know who you're marrying, and divorce should be reserved for true cases of abuse or neglect. (I don't believe anyone, male or female, should ever stay in an abusive relationship, just for clarification).

My main point was that the view of sex has changed from something sacred, to something cheap and easy. Young people want to get rid of their virginity as soon as possible, and feel shamed for keeping it into their twenties or thirties if they don't find a suitable mate. That shouldn't be the case. A person shouldn't feel ashamed because they refused to hurry up and get laid and instead decided to be responsible and wait until they were married. Before, it was assumed you would be a virgin on your wedding night, and if you weren't, you kept it quiet. Now, there's actual pressure to make sure you're NOT a virgin on your wedding night. Enter teen pregnancies. Enter STD's.

In fact, I was recently informed by a high school teacher that his female students have told him that boys don't ask girls out on dates anymore. There is no dating. The boys simply say "Hey, you wanna be my girlfriend?" If they say yes, their next sentence is "Let's go hook up."

There's no romance. There's no courting. It's straight to sex. Many young girls have had sex before they even have their first kiss. And these boys know if they ask around often enough, they'll land a hit, because the girls are feeling that peer pressure to do what their peers are doing. While high school has always had horny teenagers, it has never been this rampant and open. That is a shift in cultural morals, and a fairly recent one, and it scares me to death for my daughter. But it is the logical continence of the sexual revolution and of telling our high schoolers to just "Make sure you use protection."

I'm not saying we should make adultery a criminal offence, necessarily, although if you're married you are going into a legal contract, making legal vows before the state, and then breaking that contract. All I'm saying is that sex needs to be given the respect it deserves, and not be cheapened by simply saying "Who cares what they do in their personal time." I care, because it is a sign of how far society has crumbled, and will continue to crumble if that sort of behavior continues to be normalized. Currently we have laws against some of these things, especially when it pertains to minors, but eventually those laws will be changed if the current direction is sustained. We already have people petitioning to get pedophilia added as simply another form of sexual preference that is a personal choice and has nothing to do with anyone but those consenting. Right now that seems abhorrent, but in twenty years, if we don't make an effort to change directions, then legally it won't be.
 

Zardnaar

Hero
People gonna be stupid, unfortunately if its a jury type he said/she said situation you need to find someone not guilty even if you probably believe them. It why its so hard to get convictions. The evidence here doesn't look good for whatshisname who is probably an idiot at best, creep at worst. Not my life.
 

lowkey13

I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.
Not recently, but I certainly remember groups in college having issues due to some extracurricular bonking.

And also, thanks for reminding me of how awesome "bonk" is as an euphemism. That's slipped out of my vocabulary, and now I'm going to bring it back! :)
Justin Timberlake, c. 2006- "I'm bringing sexy back."

TwoSix, c. 2019- "I'm bringing BONK back!!!!!!"
 
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