DM Problems
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D+1
First Post
Others have correctly diagnosed the problem your DM/brother is too preoccupied indulging his own power trip to actually run a proper game. However, he might never figure it out until you say something. Man Up and tell him what you think. Or would you prefer to simply suffer quietly until he one day Sees The Light?
Mind you, you don't do it by saying, "You're a lousy DM and here's why...", you do it by saying, "I don't expect the world to be handed to the PC's on a silver platter but I'm not having much fun in this campaign and here's why..." Then tell him that when you faced this opponent you felt that the ONLY reason your characters were there was to be whipping boys for an overpowered NPC. The ability to heal his wounds a flash, to deal out a constant stream of high damage, etc. These are signs that the character was created purely to IMPRESS you, not to challenge you. It's like the Kobayashi Maru test from Star Trek - there's no way to win. Now sometimes that happens in D&D but this opponent seems designed for it.
A test for this is to ask the DM - if we killed him and thus got all his magic items and could do what HE did to US, would you honestly be willing to let us? 3E/3.5 has tools to structure encounters and single opponents to what the party can handle. With all his powers and items, is his appearance in the game just part of the fabric of the campaign, or is he just there to be able to push the PC's around at will?
LOTS of DM's, maybe even all of them
, go through this phase where they think that being able to just knock the PC's noses into the dirt all the time with uber-powerful NPC's and monsters is what it's all about. But there's this phrase I use: "The DM has at all times, and in all ways, the ability to kill the PC's at will." The DM controls EVERYTHING in the world - except what you choose to have your character try to do. So simply beating the PC's up is hardly a sign of being a good DM because you can do that without even trying. A good DM should be structuring a campaign where HE, the DM, gets as much enjoyment out of the PC's victories and increasing power as the individual players do, yet maintains a world where that still takes effort and even sacrifice to achieve.
It can be a tough lesson to learn but it will be learned a LOT faster if you make him aware of what YOUR perception of his game really is.
Mind you, you don't do it by saying, "You're a lousy DM and here's why...", you do it by saying, "I don't expect the world to be handed to the PC's on a silver platter but I'm not having much fun in this campaign and here's why..." Then tell him that when you faced this opponent you felt that the ONLY reason your characters were there was to be whipping boys for an overpowered NPC. The ability to heal his wounds a flash, to deal out a constant stream of high damage, etc. These are signs that the character was created purely to IMPRESS you, not to challenge you. It's like the Kobayashi Maru test from Star Trek - there's no way to win. Now sometimes that happens in D&D but this opponent seems designed for it.
A test for this is to ask the DM - if we killed him and thus got all his magic items and could do what HE did to US, would you honestly be willing to let us? 3E/3.5 has tools to structure encounters and single opponents to what the party can handle. With all his powers and items, is his appearance in the game just part of the fabric of the campaign, or is he just there to be able to push the PC's around at will?
LOTS of DM's, maybe even all of them
, go through this phase where they think that being able to just knock the PC's noses into the dirt all the time with uber-powerful NPC's and monsters is what it's all about. But there's this phrase I use: "The DM has at all times, and in all ways, the ability to kill the PC's at will." The DM controls EVERYTHING in the world - except what you choose to have your character try to do. So simply beating the PC's up is hardly a sign of being a good DM because you can do that without even trying. A good DM should be structuring a campaign where HE, the DM, gets as much enjoyment out of the PC's victories and increasing power as the individual players do, yet maintains a world where that still takes effort and even sacrifice to achieve.It can be a tough lesson to learn but it will be learned a LOT faster if you make him aware of what YOUR perception of his game really is.
SnowDog
First Post
It all comes down to the needs/desires of everyone involved. Are you the odd guy out, as everyone else around you has a blast and you don't? Or is the DM the only one having fun?
We can talk about how your brother is a nitwit all we want, and it could very well be true, but if he's playing with a bunch of other nitwits and they're all having fun, it comes down to you having to leave the group and find some folks whose interests are more aligned to yours.
On the other hand, if your brother is having fun at everyone else's expense, then maybe you can have a sitdown and explain what it is you want out of the game, and try to work on how the group can get to that point. Maybe have the discussion outside the game, when he's not feeling the need to impress everyone around him, etc. Don't make it confrontational, don't make him defensive.
There are many ways to enjoy RPGs, but it sounds like your brother is enjoying it at only its most base level. There's so much more above that, but the key to graduating to those is realizing this is not a win/lose game, it's a game where the objective is the same at every seat around the table: make sure every person there has fun. As DM, he has the most ability to influence that.
If he's not at that point in his life where he understands that, or if he understands it and chooses not to play that way, you have to decide whether it's worth sticking with a game you hate (in order, say, to keep peace at home) or if you should just stop playing and do something else (start your own game, for example).
We can talk about how your brother is a nitwit all we want, and it could very well be true, but if he's playing with a bunch of other nitwits and they're all having fun, it comes down to you having to leave the group and find some folks whose interests are more aligned to yours.
On the other hand, if your brother is having fun at everyone else's expense, then maybe you can have a sitdown and explain what it is you want out of the game, and try to work on how the group can get to that point. Maybe have the discussion outside the game, when he's not feeling the need to impress everyone around him, etc. Don't make it confrontational, don't make him defensive.
There are many ways to enjoy RPGs, but it sounds like your brother is enjoying it at only its most base level. There's so much more above that, but the key to graduating to those is realizing this is not a win/lose game, it's a game where the objective is the same at every seat around the table: make sure every person there has fun. As DM, he has the most ability to influence that.
If he's not at that point in his life where he understands that, or if he understands it and chooses not to play that way, you have to decide whether it's worth sticking with a game you hate (in order, say, to keep peace at home) or if you should just stop playing and do something else (start your own game, for example).
SnowDog said:
I am playing with some of my friends. The game is at my house. They are all having fun, i think. my DM manages to convince them that what he is doing is fair. Well, it is hard to explain. Like when the Dwarf PC in our group died, due to him nudging a much higher level Monk right after he had been "put" to sleep by a Bard NPC of his. The Monk used his instant death attack, Dwarf failed Fort. and died. He has them convinced that what the Dwarf did was stupid, even though eh died due to a miscommunication. The players thought that the Monk was in the way of the door for some reason, so he nudged him to move him, which is when the Monk woke up and killed him.
And my brother is the most stubboen person i know, he never listens to me.
Xeriar said:Why not offer to run your own game? - Asking your friends first, of course, just say you wanna try it out and so on. Don't bring your brother's style into it.
It doesn't sound like you could do worse than your brother
I think we should let this topic die now, thanks all.
Tom Cashel
First Post
Gellion, sit down and stop being such a baby.
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