EN World Short Story Smackdown - FINAL: Berandor vs Piratecat - The Judgment Is In!

[Ycore Rixle]

I've seen 'em. Off to work!

 

[Piratecat]

Exactly. I've got my concept, my title, and how the pictures fit in. Tomorrow, the writing!

Really, the BEST smack talk gives the impression of uber-confidence and competence, even when the freakin' judges gave us three pictures without any people in them whatsoever. Ahem. And Frank, please don't read this footnote and discover my secret smack-talkin' strategy. It's for the best, really. You'll have more fun if you don't know it.

 

[Herremann the Wise]

...even when the freakin' judges gave us three pictures without any people in them whatsoever.[/size]

Hehehe...
It was going to be worse. You were going to have none and have the below image instead.

 

[Herremann the Wise]

Of course if I was feeling even more capricious, I could have thrown this one in...

But that would have been way too much perhaps...

 

[maxfieldjadenfox]

Of course if I was feeling even more capricious, I could have thrown this one in...

But that would have been way too much perhaps...

You can't have the competition thinking Pirate Cat is kyoot as well as a false smack talker...

 

[Berandor]

Except that splitting your attention between two ideas is going to weaken each. If we assign a value of 1/3 (giving you the benefit of the doubt) to each of your stories, we end up with a final value of 2*(1/3) = 2/3, definitely less than the 1*1 = 1 final value of my effort.



Heisenberg called. He would like a word with you, something about the uncertain quality of your writing.

You overlook that my ideas are quantumly entangled and thus, any attention spent on one is transferred to the other. So, going by the measly 1/3 you proposed, it adds up to 2*((1/3)*2) = 4/3, which is almost double your solitary 1.

Also, the quality of my writing can be ascertained well enough if you just disregard the quantitiy of it. It's just the combination which is impossible to judge. I *will* be good enough to win, even if I happen to write just one sentence. So there. Physics is on my side.

Edit: And just to prove it (and for tadk), I will write a poem. (Clarification: Not purely a poem, there will be story)

 

[Berandor]

Short preview:

[sblock]"Starman?" The professor scoffed. "What kind of monicker is that? And what self-respecting superhero would go by a name like that? And you say he is..."
"A living tree that can possess people," I repeated.
"That's even worse. That's ridiculous."[/sblock]

 

[Berandor]

My first draft is running a wee long (>5000 words). I hope I can edit that down, but I am more prone to add things than cutting them. So prepare yourselves...

 

[Dlsharrock]

I found Piratecat's succinct 'don't bore the judges' to be useful. Though I wasn't sure if he was referring to my editing or just jotting down a quick reminder for himself.

 

[Piratecat]

I found Piratecat's succinct 'don't bore the judges' to be useful. Though I wasn't sure if he was referring to my editing or just jotting down a quick reminder for himself.

Actually, my rule when reading my story back to myself is "don't bore me."