I don't really follow this post either.Ego-gamers, in my opinion, represent a destructive side of the changing expectations in roleplaying games. I like games which work to emulate genres; Top Secret remains one of my favorite spy games, and I enjoyed a fair amount of MSH back in the day. But I don't want every game to emulate superheroes.
Some people want to play a fantasy RPG (not a superhero RPG) that plays less like a squad-level traditional wargame (eg the PCs - multiple per player - and their henchmen and hirelings scout out the dungeon and then slowly take it apart, room by room and level by level) and in play is guaranteed to unfold more like an adventure story - with guaranteed dramatic highs and lows, but no meaningless protagonist death.
First, what does this desire for a gameplay experience have to do with ego?
Second, what is objectionable about designing fantasy RPG rulesets that (at least attempt to) satisfy it?