Gencon Couples, Help me!

[Hijinks]

If I dont go, I'll be misrable and depressed over going and might even end up resenting her for it (subconciously anyway).

I see this as very selfish, personally. I'm sorry, but I do. It's a convention. There'll be another one coming up soon, and you may even be able to afford the next one. I would never put a convention above my SO. There's no way I would be "miserable" if I chose to spend time with a SO rather than go to a convention, even if it meant missing a favorite author who will never be at another convention, or some such.

Are you really so much more into gaming than her that you would be that upset spending time with her instead of at the convention? Maybe you need to re-evaluate whether or not you want to be in the relationship, if you even need to ask yourself these questions.

I've never been to a Gen Con and it sounds really fun, but seriously. A loving relationship is so much more important than a convention. It really is.

Your girlfriend is thinking about you and wanting you to do what will make you happy, regardless of how she would feel; you're not really wanting the same, because you keep mentioning how "miserable" you'd be. How is she honestly supposed to not let you go when you keep talking about that? Pff.

 

[The_Universe]

Get your priorities straight, man - if you can both go, AWESOME. If you can't, what the hell are you doing spending some of your valuable time together (and the money you could later spend to see her) apart?

There'll be a Gen Con next year - but your time with Ruaalien is apparently quite limited. If you don't start putting that in its proper place of importance, I have my doubts that she'll be there next year, as well. PEOPLE are always more important than games - even the best four days in gaming. In particular, people you're really close to (as she seems to be), have to beat out gaming.

I want to see you there - it was great seeing you at the RAM and around the Con...but PICK THE GIRL.

 

[ruaalien2]

My SO and I con together but we are both hard core gamers and were before we met. He didn't have to get me to roll my stats, I rolled them and we had a home game.

That said....
I would just not go Art.


Let's let that sink in a moment.






How we doing with it?











Ok now that it sunk in, plan a fun weekend find OTHER things you guys share in common. Besides Caryn is going away to college, she doesn't need to go to it tired and consick.

Won't happen. He has already told me that if I told him there was no way he would go, he would still go even if that means giving up some of the last two weeks we have before I leave.

 

[ruaalien2]

Your girlfriend is thinking about you and wanting you to do what will make you happy, regardless of how she would feel; you're not really wanting the same, because you keep mentioning how "miserable" you'd be. How is she honestly supposed to not let you go when you keep talking about that? Pff.

As I've told him, I would never tell him not to go because I don't want him to miserable missing it. I know how much Gen Con means to him and how miserable he was when he missed Gen Con So Cal this year.

I'm okay with him going and me staying home because I don't want a grumpy, nasty. miserable boyfriend for that week.

 

[ruaalien2]

There'll be a Gen Con next year - but your time with Ruaalien is apparently quite limited. If you don't start putting that in its proper place of importance, I have my doubts that she'll be there next year, as well. PEOPLE are always more important than games - even the best four days in gaming. In particular, people you're really close to (as she seems to be), have to beat out gaming.

If I'm not around next year, it won't be because he chose Gen Con over me. If that was the case I would have left him when he told me that he will go to Gen Con even if I don't go.

 

[Hijinks]

He has already told me that if I told him there was no way he would go, he would still go even if that means giving up some of the last two weeks we have before I leave.

If that were me, I wouldn't be there when he got back. But you're not me and you've got your own priorities. He just sounds very selfish - he chooses to be miserable when he can't go - you can make a choice to accept what you cannot change, and just be happy where you are and with whomever you're with. If he chooses to be miserable because he can't attend a gaming convention - well, that's not someone I'd personally want to be with *shrug*

 

[ruaalien2]

If that were me, I wouldn't be there when he got back. But you're not me and you've got your own priorities. He just sounds very selfish - he chooses to be miserable when he can't go - you can make a choice to accept what you cannot change, and just be happy where you are and with whomever you're with. If he chooses to be miserable because he can't attend a gaming convention - well, that's not someone I'd personally want to be with *shrug*

As I've said to him, he wants the best of both worlds: Gen Con & me with him. He knows I won't be happy if he goes and leaves me at home, so he is seeing it as the best way, for me to go. At the same time, that means me taking of off work and spending money that I don't have to spend to make him happy.

I love him and don't want to loose him even though he tends to be a little to much into his gaming and stuff at times. I want him to be happy and I know how much it means to him, I couldn't tell him not to go.

 

[JesterPoet]

It's just a convention.

There will be one next year.

 

[ruaalien2]

It's just a convention.

There will be one next year.

Seems a lot of the recent posts feel this way. It makes me think if I'm doing the right thing to try and make him happy and go.

 

[The_Universe]

If I'm not around next year, it won't be because he chose Gen Con over me. If that was the case I would have left him when he told me that he will go to Gen Con even if I don't go.

I believe that's been stated - it's a matter (I would think) of general priorities, rather than a specific issue. You seem pretty mature about the whole thing - and so I would expect no less. Whatever you decide to do will be fine, I'm sure - I just think that if money's as tight for you guys as you have already implied, even just HIM going displays some seriously wacked out priorities.