I would play a bard if. . .

[Darklone]

What's so bad about singing?

 

[seans23]

Its called a bard for a reason. You want an orator I say you make a class called the Orator.
Refusing to be a singer or musician runs absolutely contrary to the class as intended.

I imagine a large crowd of mimes would pummel you for saying that, if they weren't trapped in those invisible boxes.

 

[Vyvyan Basterd]

Poncy singers with lutes? I'm sorry, I wasn't aware that Magic-blooded Orcs with as much strength as the party fighter were "poncy". Bards are often played as against-the-grain warriors by people seeking a fun challenge. Savage Bards fit the bill for that perfectly.
I'd make custom devices for people who want to play without instruments, people who want to vocalists are fine. But no music=no Bardic MUSIC. Its called Bardic MUSIC for a reason. Nothing is stopping your bard from maxing ranks in Perform(oratory) and making fancy speeches.

Did you even read the SRD quote above?

"While these abilities fall under the category of bardic music and the descriptions discuss singing or playing instruments, they can all be activated by reciting poetry, chanting, singing lyrical songs, singing melodies, whistling, playing an instrument, or playing an instrument in combination with some spoken performance."

While it is called MUSIC, it doesn't actually have to be music. How much clearer can the rules be?

 

[Firebeetle]

Its called a bard for a reason. You want an orator I say you make a class called the Orator.
Refusing to be a singer or musician runs absolutely contrary to the class as intended.

Call me contrary, My LG bard is an "actor", my high level bard started as a comedic performer. I've also encountered a dancing bard in LG. You're being very narrow in your interpretation here.

 

[Vyvyan Basterd]

I've also encountered a dancing bard in LG. You're being very narrow in your interpretation here.

Using Perform (dance) to activate bardic music would seem to go against the intent. All the forms listed in the Bard's description involve sound. Perform (tapdancing) maybe?

 

[Chimera]

Using Perform (dance) to activate bardic music would seem to go against the intent. All the forms listed in the Bard's description involve sound. Perform (tapdancing) maybe?

Oh come on now.

Dancing automatically summons Background Music.

 

[lukelightning]

I've thought about making a performance art bard. Same exact features as a regular bard, but uses "performance art" instead of music. He'd hit himself in the head with a stuffed frog while clutching a painting of a naked samurai and sing happy birthday.... he could captivate people not out of vertuosity, but out of weirdness.

I'd play a bard if I was sure the DM wouldn't nerf bards' fascinate and suggestion abilities. Some DMs act like merely looking at an opponent counts as a hostile action, and that a suggestion is nothing but a command spell.

 

[Vyvyan Basterd]

Oh come on now.

Dancing automatically summons Background Music.

So does Perform (montage). Hmmm, off to write up my next bard!

 

[Vyvyan Basterd]

Poncy singers with lutes? I'm sorry, I wasn't aware that Magic-blooded Orcs with as much strength as the party fighter were "poncy". Bards are often played as against-the-grain warriors by people seeking a fun challenge. Savage Bards fit the bill for that perfectly.

You've reminded me of another character concept I'm waiting to play. The TWF orc wardrummer. Probably Bard/Warchanter using light maces as both instruments of percussion and weapons.

 

[lukelightning]

Probably Bard/Warchanter using light maces as both instruments of percussion and weapons.

At the same time too, if you use your enemies as drums.