Joining a new group.

[modernist]

So, I haven't played any pen and paper games for several years. Back when I did, it was almost exclusively with a group of friends and occasionally we added new people in.

Well, we got older and all moved away and I drifted out of it. Now, I'm wanting to get back into it so I've been using several tools to find people in the area (Lexington, KY basically) and have contacted several.

Thing is, I've never joined someone elses group, really. Nor have I ever really gamed with a complete group of strangers before. As I wait to hear back, I'm starting to get a hair nervous about it.

So, I'm asking around for any tips, or things I should/shouldn't do as the "new guy" coming in to a group. I'm really worried about striking a balance early on between not being really "over the top" in anything I do as a character that may rub some folks the wrong way and also between not being too timid or boring for fear people might not think anything of me at all.

Thanks!

 

[S'mon]

Hm - relax, be friendly, keep your eyes open as to the group's playstyle, see if you fit in. Don't be afraid to grasp opportunities for the kind of thing you enjoy, whether that's flashy tricks in combat or in-depth RP interaction. Other people should enjoy your enthusiasm - but don't hog attention if it seems they're not. If you enjoyed the game, email the DM afterwards to express your thanks. Any suggestions you make should be phrased appropriately: 'I'd love to fight drow at some point' or 'The NPCs are cool - it'd be great if you could describe them more, to help me visualise them' (as a new player told me a few days ago) and anything that sounds like criticism should be combined with effusive thanks.

Be polite, be friendly, relax and enjoy yourself. Look to increase the enjoyment of everyone at the table through both your IC and OOC actions and talk.

Otherwise, it's hard to be specific. You need to get an idea what the GM & group is like. Do they roleplay in-character? Does the DM want one-line, one-page, or five-page backstories for the PCs (I like about 1-2 paragraphs, personally)? Is it an adversarial 'Gamist' game, or more one of co-operative story creation? Do you like it?

 

[modernist]

Is it really ok to, say, email the DM after a session or so and say things like "I'd like to fight some Drow".

I just don't want to come off as some strange new guy in the group trying to change things or whatever. In my contacting of people, I've been pretty upfront that I'm now a rules lawyering kind of player, nor do I really powergame at all but I do happen to get OCD about spell DCs as a caster. I figure that's enough of a start.

Did get recommended that, to start, I bring chips and pop and whatnot to show I can contribute and such.

I've got some solid support characters sitting around from play by posts game I'd probably try to join with initially. None of them really had any extreme personalities when I thought them up, but again, I don't want to come across as shy, boring or unoriginal.

 

[S'mon]

Is it really ok to, say, email the DM after a session or so and say things like "I'd like to fight some Drow".

You can ask the GM that - "Is it ok to give suggestions for what we'd like to do?" The traditional way to do it is to put it IC in your character backstory - "Vili's clanhold was raided by Drow when he was young, he hates them and looks for any opportunity to battle them" - but I think asking the GM whether he takes suggestions is good practice. If he's running an Adventure Path or similar, then there may not be that flexibility, the trick is to make a PC who integrates well into the campaign. That's a good idea in general - I wish more players would ask me what kind of PCs would be most suitable for the themes of the campaign, in a RP rather than just mechanically-allowed sense. Until they ask, I don't always know myself - eg I'm running a Swords & Sorcery 4e D&D campaign and only just starting to realise that Primal-source classes don't seem to fit in well.

 

[modernist]

the trick is to make a PC who integrates well into the campaign. That's a good idea in general - I wish more players would ask me what kind of PCs would be most suitable for the themes of the campaign, in a RP rather than just mechanically-allowed sense.

Certainly planned on it. It's why, for the most part I'm being a little upfront on my "preferred" methods of play. I, for example, much prefer playing something like a Wizard as opposed to a Barbarian. I don't like anything too straight forward, really.

But I definitely do plan on discussing initially if it's something homebrew, or an adventure path and whatnot, and also what the rest of the party is and how long the campaign is planning on being run. If it's going to be a long thing, definitely will double check if after I get more used to the group I'd be allowed to reroll a character at some point that may blend in better or fill a better niche, or gap as opposed to a character that may be good up front just to help ease me into the group a little easier.

At the moment, my current itch is Pathfinder. So I'm starting to whip up, aside from that support Wizard, something like an Oracle that can sort of fill different little support roles, or an Inquisitor which is a little versatile as well. I figure coming with a few ideas initially that can serve different purposes that are potentially interesting characters is only a good thing as well.

 

[S'mon]

I've got some solid support characters sitting around from play by posts game I'd probably try to join with initially. None of them really had any extreme personalities when I thought them up, but again, I don't want to come across as shy, boring or unoriginal.

Do you enjoy playing support characters? If so, then good. Check what would fit well into the group - if there are 2 Clerics already you might not want to bring a 3rd in.

I'd go for a PC personality that was extroverted, pleasant, and had a moderate schtick the other players can pick up on - slight accent, older, younger, etc. You should probably play a PC of the same sex as yourself for your first PC, IME, though this varies by player group. If the PC group is non-evil, I'd recommend playing LG or maybe NG alignment.

Re 'characters sitting around from play by posts game' - be careful here, don't bring the 5-page-backstory, 3-years-in-a-PBEM character into a new game. As a DM it's a big red flag for me if I get an 8 page backstory of a new PC's old adventures in some other guy's campaign. The new PC can be inspired by your old PC, but should be essentially a new, fresh character for the new game.

 

[S'mon]

But I definitely do plan on discussing initially if it's something homebrew, or an adventure path and whatnot, and also what the rest of the party is and how long the campaign is planning on being run. If it's going to be a long thing, definitely will double check if after I get more used to the group I'd be allowed to reroll a character at some point that may blend in better or fill a better niche, or gap as opposed to a character that may be good up front just to help ease me into the group a little easier.

I think that's a good approach. Really, I think the very fact that you're concerned about these questions indicates that you're likely to be a good, considerate player, and most decent groups will be happy to have you.

 

[modernist]

I think that's a good approach. Really, I think the very fact that you're concerned about these questions indicates that you're likely to be a good, considerate player, and most decent groups will be happy to have you.

Yeah, I'm mostly worried about fitting in, I suppose.

Like I said, I've never really seriously played with complete strangers like this.

I guess I'm initially worried about finding a group I inevitably wouldn't fit in with. Like, for example, finding a group and making an interesting backstory for a character, showing up, relaying all this and in turn find out I come across as the "way too serious guy" as we dungeon crawl for hours with no real roleplaying.

 

[S'mon]

Yeah, I'm mostly worried about fitting in, I suppose.

Like I said, I've never really seriously played with complete strangers like this.

I guess I'm initially worried about finding a group I inevitably wouldn't fit in with. Like, for example, finding a group and making an interesting backstory for a character, showing up, relaying all this and in turn find out I come across as the "way too serious guy" as we dungeon crawl for hours with no real roleplaying.

Yes, I'd say keep your initial backstory to 1-2 paras. Leave room to expand later if it seems appropriate.

 

[modernist]

Ok, so for another direction of questions:

Pathfinder has enough info around that I can get an idea of the system even though I don't own any books for it at the moment. But, I'm also looking around for groups for other games and such I'd like to find.

So, for other DMs out there. How do you handle a new player coming in unfamiliar with the system? What do you ask of them ahead of time?