tuxgeo
Adventurer
Over 700 hours DMing in 4e, and on average, a character is down every single fight rolling death saves, and on average, a character dies every 3rd or 4th level. More than 7 or 8 TPK's. And my monsters all have -15% hit points and since MM3 damage guidelines, I rarely go above n+2 fiights, and that's only for the big bad boss end of adventure fights. It is quite possible to challenge and kill players in 4e, although I will admit that a specialized healer cleric makes it more difficult, especially at paragon and epic levels.
maybe its just my players who suck.
It isn't your players who suck. Fourth edition can be lethal to PCs.
There were numerous reports in 2008 about TPKs against Irontooth in Keep on the Shadowfell.
I ran 4 PCs through the 4E Essentials Red Box: TPK in the Wizard's Laboratory. (The PCs used bad tactics.)
A new party of 5 PCs, going through KotS with added encounters from WotC to give more XP, had a scary encounter with Hobgoblin Slavers as the PCs were making their way toward the Keep for the first time:
5 of 5 perception checks were abysmal, allowing the slavers total surprise; the Subcommander and the 2 Soldiers each hit the unarmored human sorceress in the surprise round, dropping her below 0; the unarmored dwarf wizard dropped twice, once in Round 1 and again in Round 2; the party survived only by spending 5 of 5 Action Points and 4 of 5 Dailies. The sorceress missed her first death saving throw, and only acted in one round, using her Action Point to cast Burning Spray twice because she was adjacent to enemies and didn't want to provoke OAs, so she never had a good chance to cast her Daily.
(The dwarf wizard went from 8 healing surges remaining before that fight to 3 healing surges remaining after their next short rest, to get back to full; and that's with two leaders in the party.)
And that was with the last 2 surviving hobgoblins running away and vowing revenge, thus cutting the fight short before the PCs suffered even more.
Yes, 4E can be lethal--and a challenge even when no PCs die.