Like the game, hate the habits

[noretoc]

I really hate to say this, but I think you made the right decision on not playing there. I would like to point out that asking them not to, no matter how politely, as some have mentioned would in my opinion be selfish. Now I know how that sounds, but fist I want to say I don't smoke. I have never had a rule about it, by I host the game and all my friend who have smoked have gone outside without me asking. If I smoked I would do the same. In a way it is selfish for someone to smoke in front of other who do not. But. Being a new guy coming into a place where custom is already established, and asking them to change for you is simply rude. It does not matter what they are doing. If they all had a habit of sitting naked and masturbating (pardon the example) it is obvious they are comfortable with it. If you wanted to join you should be the one to adapt, or not join. It is unfair for everyone else to change because or you (no matter how unpleasant). If a new player came in to my group and ask us to put on our shoes (as most of my players make themselves at home in my house), I think I would be offended. The fact that someone who is coming into my place and asking me to change to make him more comfortable would irk me. Also if he left and said "I can’t take the no shoes. If you guys want to play at my house with shoes come on" I would be offended. Not only did he come into my game, have a problem with the way it was done, but then invited MY players to possibly leave my game is also rude.
Please don't get me wrong. I completely understand your problem, but the fact that you are upset they are doing this, and that you are trying to pull some of them away from the game they are playing bothers me. (I know you didn't ask any not to play in their original game, but sometimes that is how it can seem. Many people have limited playtime, and would not be able to make both. It just seems wrong. You should look for players elsewhere, instead of possibly breaking up a group, because you didn't like their smoky house.

 

[Maldur]

Please ignore the: Walk around coughing really loudly, wear a gasmask, or other obvious clues.

Its insulting. Just ask. I smoke, but when it bothers someone I wont . I have no problems with stepping out for a smoke but dont be immature about it.

I know its very unfashionable to smoke, I also its VERY fashionable to not smoke. But being friendly, and mature about it works better than acting like a git.

If someone would show up wearing a gasmask I would chain smoke the rest of the evening! cigars! big ones! in the direction of the mask!

But if you just ask normally, I wont....

 

[Sixchan]

Please ignore the: Walk around coughing really loudly, wear a gasmask, or other obvious clues.

Its insulting. Just ask. I smoke, but when it bothers someone I wont . I have no problems with stepping out for a smoke but dont be immature about it.

I know its very unfashionable to smoke, I also its VERY fashionable to not smoke. But being friendly, and mature about it works better than acting like a git.

If someone would show up wearing a gasmask I would chain smoke the rest of the evening! cigars! big ones! in the direction of the mask!

But if you just ask normally, I wont....

But, umm, if he's wearing a gas mask, what difference will that make? It's not like he's going to smell it...

 

[Maldur]

But, umm, if he's wearing a gas mask, what difference will that make? It's not like he's going to smell it...

I said that to prove a point, if you dont want to get it, fine!

 

[ced1106]

Most disappointing will be the fact that I reckon I could've made some good friends there. But ultimately, the smoking and the guy who felt it necessary to tell everyone to shut-up (even though he had no problem interrupting everyone else) all the time, made the decision for me.

Hope it works out. Every smoker I've met was courteous enough to smoke outside (well, except the relatives and I bet if that guy bothered you, he bothered others in the group as well. I wouldn't be surprised if others would be interested in gaming without him. And you can always invite the DM -- maybe he wants to be a player, too!

I don't know what the best way of approaching this would be and would be interested in hearing how others did it. Maybe start a new thread.


Cedric.
aka. Washu! ^O^

 

[Terraism]

Ask nicely if the actual gaming area could be non-smoking (or at least better ventilated, it's not as if it would be to cold at this time of year), but respect the answer. As Ced1106 said: "Host's house, host's rules."

I just got a chuckle out of this, because it's somewhere around -10 outside just about now. Then I realized that you're in Australia. Still, it was worth a good laugh.

 

[Umbran]

I just got a chuckle out of this, because it's somewhere around -10 outside just about now.

Hey, Terraism! I went to Clarkson! And we didn't count it really cold until it got to -20

 

[DDK]

Please don't get me wrong. I completely understand your problem, but the fact that you are upset they are doing this, and that you are trying to pull some of them away from the game they are playing bothers me.

The game they're playing is set to finish in a few sessions time and part of the reason I was going was to meet other players in order to form another group. Although I forgot to mention it in the session, the DM knows and will be passing on the information to the other players.

Although in part I agree that it would be a big call to ask everybody else to change their habits, in this particular case I think you're wrong. The example you used of masturbating doesn't hurt me, whereas constantly being wreathed in smoke does.

And you can always invite the DM -- maybe he wants to be a player, too!

And that's exactly what I did!

 

[Terraism]

Hey, Terraism! I went to Clarkson! And we didn't count it really cold until it got to -20

Oh, joy. Actually, I don't mind it much - with the exception of running to class, I don't have to go outside that much. Now, I do enjoy being outside, and when it's nice (meaning 10 or above) I tend to take 2 AM walks, but I can live with it. So, when'd you leave?

 

[Tyberious Funk]

Wow. I'm pretty amazed. Even the heaviest smokers I know wont do it inside ... even in their *own* house. Even they don't like the smells and stains it leaves around the house. I thought this was fairly accepted protocol these days.

I must say, what has particularly suprised me is the number of respondants to this post admitting they smoke. I don't recall having met a single smoking roleplayer before... ever. Given the sort of demographic that RPing attracts, I would have though smoking wasn't very common.

Errr... that is, smoking *tobacco*. Have known more than the occasional roleplayer that indulged in smoking other substances, particularly to help fuel their imagination.