Mine Groupen Broken Upen! Now What?

[ckirby]

Hello all,

Recently, I have had to pull the plug on my D&D group for an unspecified amount of time. My recent promotion, Summer weather, and other personal events have created a real problem for me and meeting weekly with my group.

In short, I was and am, burned out.

I was the DM, so me leaving does put a kink in peoples' plans, I am sure. There are a number of individuals in the group, however, that are more than capable of continuing on as the DM...no one stepped forward, though. In fact, when I left, a number of other individuals left with me...making it look like a group split..which it was not.

Now, here's the catch....I fear that there are a few members of our group who took my "jumping ship" personally. While I cannot do anything to make them "snap out of it", I do regret that we might not be able to play again in the future. Sad, really.

Any advice? Any stories? A number of the members from the group still talk to me but there are a few who seem to disbelieve that I even exist anymore. Pretty silly. All of the people I played with were fine examples of creative, energetic gamers...a real credit to the game. Loosing them as players is a hard hit to the gut.

 

[Henrix]

Tell them why you had to take a break, and try to set a time in the future when you thinnk you can start it up again, at perhaps a slightly slower rate, if necessary.
(Unless you are so burned out that you feel you never want to DM again, of course.)

These things happen, and sometimes people get upset, but if you just indicate that you're not angry or burned out atthem personally, it will probably be alright in a while.

Try to invite them to an occasional board game, or something, to show that you still want to meet them.

 

[ckirby]

Good advice. Thanks!

 

[Henry]

You do need to speak to those in your group to find out if anyone did take it personally, and if they did, reassure them.

What it might have been better to do was inform them that you would be unable to play due to job and life problems, but find out if anyone could DM beyond you, and offer to help them a bit if they wanted you to. It's sad to think that one person is the "lynchpin" of the group - I beleive I used to be that way for one of our old groups, since if I didn't make it, the rest of the group never even got together. Now it is not the case, were I ever to have to cease gaming, but then again the current group is a little...rabid in this aspect.

I do miss the days last year of having 10-player games, though. Some people who used to play are no longer able to.

 

[shouit]

I be a member of said group. The last gaming session before the break up, I unfortunately missed do to a once in a lifetime opportunity. I normally don't miss gaming unless I am dying. But, that is for another thread, Dedication to gaming. I come into work the next day to a barrage of emails stating that we all need to take an indefinate about of time off of gaming. I have been in enough groups that do such actions and they never get back together again. Actually the first time I moved out to MN, I found a group and we played for a few months and then the group decided to "break up." But, in actuality they wanted to get rid of a few players which they did not like. I was one of them. I have known ckirby for a while and was DM of the group, until I handed the reigns over to him cause I was have a trying time with work, relationship, and everything. I don't know if the group will ever get back together, but it was a talented group. I have asked the players of the group that still wanted to play into another group I run on Sundays. And so far, that seems to have worked out well. As for ckirby, I have asked him to play as well, when and if, he feels that he has the desire to do so.

 

[ckirby]

As for ckirby, I have asked him to play as well, when and if, he feels that he has the desire to do so.

It's true...he did.

 

[DMaple]

So is everybody happy now?

I get DM burn out every now and again but thankfully nearly everyone in our group is up for running a game so we rotate every few months.

Also one of our players works shifts so can't always make game nights.

Real life is going to muck up your games its something you learn to work around.

 

[Kalendraf]

It can still work!

I'm another member of said gaming group. I even volunteered to take over DM'ing duties, though I realized that doing so might be a bit taxing on me since I already run another weekly campaign on a different night of the week, along with a monthly campaign. But I was at least willing to give it a try. And it might have even happened, but suddenly two more members (players) in the group decided to pull up their tent stakes as well. They decided that they also needed some time off. So suddenly things were in a bind. It's tough to make a go of things with just 3 people. Yet those 3 of us really wanted to keep playing.

So decided to try continuing play on the weekly night, but pick up a previously started campaign used by some of the other members of the group. Doing so, we also picked up an additional player from that group. However, weeknights presently don't work well for at least one player, so the campaign is currently moved to weekends. This new campaign should not be viewed as a death knell for the old one.

I'm willing to resume the previous campaign whenever the DM and other players return. I realize that it can be difficult to take an extended break and then pick up like nothing happened. My monthly group proves that even just a 4-week break makes remembering details a bit difficult. We've even gone as long as 3 months between sessions making it difficult to remember anything about the campaign at all. The role-playing suffers greatly, but the campaign goes at least goes on. After a couple sessions, things tend to settle back into regular gaming. The difference here is that we were playing weekly, and are looking at a several week break, which may make the delay all the more noticeable. But I have had at least one campaign go thru exactly such a shift and it survived for another 2 years. So it can be done.