D&D General Mixed Background

[Benjamin Olson]

You say that like it's not something players are supposed to be doing anyway.

The idea that players can just show up and do and present whatever they want for their characters because "the books say I can" and the DM has to allow it no questions asked... has never been a habit that the designers nor any DM would have ever wanted to actually promote.

Players are meant to talk with their DM and the DM is meant to talk with their players about how the characters and game are going to run? Oh darn. Whatever shall we do?

In 5e Classic, outside of helping absolute beginners pick one, I never once had a conversation about the mechanical choice of background with a player as their DM, or with a DM as a player, and that was just dandy with me. Had plenty of conversations about narrative background, but whether the mechancal choice (with its 2 skills, 2 tools or languages, never to be used special feature, and equipment pack) was tinker, tailor, soldier, or spy was up to the player and that was just fine.

Just because I can and should talk to my DM about my character before playing doesn't mean I want to ask DM permission to pick a name for my character not in the game's official list of suggested games, nor as DM do I want to have to field 40 Discord messages about whether it's okay if the character has tawny gray eyes, is slightly short for their race, etc. Players being empowered to make some independent decisions is better for everyone involved. I know it's a bummer to those DMs who should actually just write a novel that players have an inkling of a say. Probably also to people who just love sessions zero so much that they want them to stretch into countless hours of negotiating minutia. I don't think most people are in those categories.

But you say this as if it was something you weren't already doing in 5e Classic games. Friend, you can just give your players a modicum of autonomy, or your DM a modicum of a break from having to weigh in on every character decision when they already have a whole world to create. You can not haggle over every little thing about the character and the game runs just fine. Everyone can still have fun. And people who are introverts, as well as people who waver between multiple character concepts before their first session, have less stress.