Player's Favorite Sayings?

[Kaleon Moonshae]

Most of the common sayings in my groups over the years have been not for public consumption. But a couple that are still popular with my old group (for some reason) are:

"Oh boy...the DM is going to skull**** us again!" Ususally used when the DM gets a mean look in his eyes, comes from a veyr mean GM we had.

"Help mommy I'm being tentacle-*insert word meaning taken advantage of here*!" used whenever a character is taking massive damage from something. Originally came about because a character in one of ours games was taken avantage of by a shoggoth ala la blue girl. For the record I will state it was *not* my idea as GM, but she was...odd...and ran with it when the chance came.

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

"I have shoes." -Used when we fail a spot check horribly. The variant "Look, my shoes are untied!" is used if the fail wasn't quite as bad.

"Just Keep Swimming" is used whenever things look really bad (and whenever we're doing a water adventure). We also use "Mine?" but mostly just to annoy the DM.

"He's on my list" is said nearly every session by a particular player to denote his annoyance with some NPC. I believe Satan remains at the top of his 'to kill' list.

"Do caves often chase you?" is a line used to point out a particularly stupid question. We started using it after a player actually asked said question.

"Sing, you bastard!" Our bard never remembers to sing. Even after repeated requests from round to round in combat. So, we've made signs.

 

[Hypersmurf]

"He's on my list" is said nearly every session by a particular player to denote his annoyance with some NPC.

Heh.

I just finished a one-shot where two of the PCs slipped over the course of two sessions from Chaotic Neutral to pretty firmly Chaotic Evil. They had a combined List.

They actually managed to cross off most of the names on it. Although they didn't get Tiggy-Winks' dad.

Tiggy-winks was a nine-year-old half-orc kid they terrorised. Tiggy-winks at one point sniffled something about how 'My dad could beat you up...'

Tiggy-winks' dad went on the List.

They made a couple of references from time to time about 'Damn it, we still have to track down that half-orc kid's dad!', but never quote got around to it.

I made the players' day during the second session when the PCs informed a city official about Manfredwood's corruption.

"Hmm," the official replied. "It would appear I must put Manfredwood on my List."

Instant camaraderie

-Hyp.

 

[Pierce]

Ah, there's many. Here's a sampling:

Any spectacularly failed Spot/Listen check: "What did you roll?" "Brocolli!" From when the original spectacularly-failed-Spot-check-maker answered "I see nothing but a small patch of brocolli"

When you roll a 3 on a d20: "Burke!" From a 1/2 orc character in a one-shot. In every combat, the player rolled 3s almost exclusively.

And finally, when the DM asks you what your AC/Save/Defense is, the correct answer is always, "What did you roll?"

 

[TheGemini]

"Can I roll again?"

 

[Twowolves]

Once upon a time, we were fighting a party of vampires; vampire fighter, vampire wizard, vampire cleric, etc. Our agnostic cleric (he was 10th lvl, but only could cast 1st and 2nd lvl spells) had fled, the fighter was bleeding to death, the 4th lvl cleric out of spells, the wizard was trapped by a Maze spell, and myself, the druid, had resorted to melee. The vampires, being the regerating sort, were at full hp. The other players looked at me and asked if we should run, to which I reply....

"Run?? We've got them right where we want them!"

(We won that battle, btw.)

Whenever having a "philosophical debate" about how the rules worked back in the days before 3rd edition, we'd always come up with a hypothetical situation and our test subject would be a goblin. "So you take a goblin...." Even if the question had nothing to do with a creature at all, we'd start the question "So you take a goblin, get rid of the goblin, then you....."

Also, some random tidbits from various campaigns:

"You want the Fireball here?" "No, here." "You mean HERE, don't you?" "No, I want it HERE." "Ooooo-Kay... now your unconscious body is on fire."

"FLURRY O' BLOWS!!" (or sometimes "Flurry... of blows.")

"Torm guide my hand!"

"That was my roll!"

"I'm saving it for the BIG fight."

"Coooooold steel!"

"Can I have a monkey?"



Twowolves Howling

 

[Toras]

Player sayings...
"F...ing 'Loths" Due to the perchant of DM for the infernal creatures, especially the arcano variety. Usually it then went sexual and wrong after that but it started off as a saying.

Of course now that one player is dating Akin the friendly fiend we have to follow any "I hate f....king loths." with a "No Offense Aiken"

"F.... off, Go Die." Is a personal favorite response to Fiends trying to mess with head.

 

[Sejs]

The PCs are trying to stop a group of thieves from breaking into a certain shop for ... some godawful reason. I can't remember why anymore. Anyway, not important.


DM: OKay, as you round the corner into the alleyway, you see two men standing on eachother's shoulders.

*long, dead-silent pause drifts around the table*

PC1: Waitaminute - how can they both be standing on eachother's...
PC2(interrupting): F@^& it! We're fighting Cirque de Soleil! Run for your life!

 

[Talon5]

Monk- "Using Flurry of Misses."

"Whats for dinner?"

 

[DrZombie]

"I'm not dead yet"

Came from a heroic battle from one of my characters that ambushed a bunch of clanners in her mech. She got a few serious hits, lost all her armor on her center torso, but would taunt the clanners by shouting "I'm not dead yet" on the radio whenever she somehow survived another attack. We won the fight.

We now often use it whenever someone low on hp (usually me) keeps on fighting instead of running away.