Stupidest things PCs/DMs have done

[SorvahrSpahr]

the party cleric casting light on a zombie

while fighting a DM custom-made monster, which could cast Phantasmal Killer, the monster casts it, and everyone saves, the monster said "there's plenty more from where that one came", the cleric's turn came, he didn't protect the party with the right spell, instead she cast a freakin' bless, a couple of turns later, we get hit with another phantasmal killer. the cleric was no more.

with a desperate way to avoid a tough fight, the party's rogue was trying to negotiate with a demon (thank you guys for helping me with the creation of the demon, it was a great battle), the party's ninja kept insulting and pissing her off. as I was going to ask for initiatives, the party's rogue yells at the ninja to shut up. when he turned around, the ninja said one last thing against the demon, they rolled initiatives, the ninja was knocked unconscious in 3 rounds

 

[STARP_Social_Officer]

This should spawn two more threads: "Stupidest Rules Designers have done" and "Stupidest rulings DMs have made"

I think it's hilarious. I only wish it'd happened to me. Reminds me of the time a mage in my old campaign cast a dispel magic in a strong wild zone and ended up dispelling himself (ie. wiping all spells from his memory). That was cool.

 

[shilsen]

In the three sessions of a game I'm in run by Rolzup, I've done three of the dumber things a PC of mine (human rogue/duskblade) has done. All with full awareness and intentionally, because that's what my PC would do at the time:

1) The PCs (3rd lvl) are in an underground complex, surrounded by a bunch of creepy blind tunnel-dwellers, talking to their leader near a well. Suddenly, a song wafts up from the well and we have to make Will saves. I succeed, but two of the other PCs fail and head for the well. One jumps in before I can get there, but I grab the other right on the brink. And then one of a bunch of hidden enemies charges and bull-rushes us both in.

We land in a spider-web, and some distance below us is the first PC who fell in, trying to fight off a huge half-woman half-spider. We're stuck in the web, with no way to climb out or get down and help the lone PC, who's way out of his league. So I pull out a wand, look at the other PC, and say, "Set the web on fire." He looks at me like I'm nuts. "No, really - set it on fire; it's the only way we can reach him."

So, for the next two rounds, I fall through a burning web, taking damage all the way, firing a wand as I fall (and hitting every rd), until I land next to my ally with 4 out of my 21 hp left.

2) We chase the spider-creature into a series of rooms, and then get ambushed by it as it hits us with some sonic damage, sticking its head around a curtained doorway. The dwarf fighter goes rushing in after it, and I follow. As I come through the door, the creature takes an attack on me, dropping me to 7 hit pts. I'm too close to use my ranseur and if I back out, draw an AoO. So, instead of using Combat Expertise and going defensive, I drop my ranseur, use a spell (Blade of Blood, PHB2), causing 3d6 extra dmg but doing 5 pts of damage to myself (taking me to 2 hp) and punch it in the face with a spiked gauntlet. And roll a 20 and an 18 for a 23 pt crit. Then it hit us with a sonic attack, I blew my save, dropped to -9 hp and was dragged away and healed in the nick of time. But it was worth it.

3) Next session, we're in a fight where I and the party rogue have 5 enemies surrounding and attacking us (we're 3rd lvl, & four of them are 2nd and one 4th). I just got critted and would have been killed if it wasn't for the group using three of the swashbuckling cards we use. And the dwarf decides to cover our escape by throwing in two smokesticks. Which, he fails to calculate, leaves the two of us down to half speed, surrounded by enemies, in a smoke cloud, and unable to take 5 ft steps.

I manage to barely make my way out of the smoke, to find that the other PCs are busy fighting new enemies. And, more importantly, that the rogue is stuck in there alone, with all the enemies.

So I look at my character sheet, look at the DM, and say what I fully expect to be my PC's famous last words - "I have 7 hit pts. I'm going back in."

I survived, the rogue survived, and so did everyone else. Fortune favors the brave and the really, really stupid.

So there are three of my stupid PC acts, none of which got me killed. Didn't do any really stupid acts yesterday, but did get dropped to -5 twice in four rounds. I think I'm running through my nine lives fast.

 

[Chimera]

Last night we came awful close to what would have been a remorseless TPK on my (GM) part. Not so much a 'stupidest thing' story, but a near miss.

Party is thrashing around too interested in being heroes to actually stop and think about the PLOT that is going on. Scads of opportunities to talk to people and figure things out are going by with them too interested in fighting first.

They've killed the 'advance party' in a battle that took pretty much everything they had. All but one of the Cleric's spells, all but the Wizard's Detect Thoughts spell, several Dork Tower cards, a bunch of Hero Points. They foolishly kill the one guy who is begging them not to kill him and could have provided a wealth of information. They save the enemy cleric from dying only to have her laugh at their foolishness and provide a small amount of information that they've so far lacked. (Strangely, after mentioning that he has the Detect Thoughts spell remaining, the Wizard doesn't bother to use it on the prisoner!)

That was in the morning. They 'Power Nap' (Dork Tower card) to get their spells back and prepare for the main force, which is coming after dark to perform a large sacrifice on the hilltop they occupy. They've previously been told, by a prisoner they freed from a Kobold prison, that on one occasion, 3 humans and 24 Kobolds were sacrificed. On another, it was 6 Humans and 12 Kobolds. Astonishingly, the players don't "get" the numbers and seem to be expecting a small group to be arriving.

That night, a large procession of over 200 Kobolds and their prisoners comes in to view. Sorcerers, Clerics, Bards, Rangers.... With lots of prisoners (more than needed?), bags of supplies, litters, animal cages, etc.

The players leave the enemy cleric on top of the hill, alive, as they head down the back side of the hill and circle around.

They spend close to an hour arguing about attacking the Kobold force directly, "in order to save the prisoners". Got pretty heated at times, with one player ready to walk out the door.

I would not have had a single moment of regret for killing the lot of them. Six 4th level characters against over 200 Kobolds, many with class levels. Suicide, and I won't pull an entire nerf factory out of my butt to save people from that kind of willful stupidity.

Fortunately, they settled on a hit-and-run attempt at the back end of the train, which succeeded only due to some additional card-and-hero point action followed by RUN AWAY!!!

That and the fact that, while they managed to free 3 Human prisoners and get them out, the Kobolds still had enough to carry out the sacrifice.

You'll see this in my Story Hour next weekend.

 

[Lalalei2001]

My cousin told me about this one.

DM: "You know, you're 6' high and sitting on a 3' high horse in a saddle designed to keep you from falling. Now you're charging at full speed into a 7' high cave. What are you going to do?"
PC: "Hit my head on the cave roof?!"

He died.

 

[SorvahrSpahr]

this must be THE greatest thread ever. someone get this one stickied for eternity

 

[Lalalei2001]

^ Lol, thanks

My cousin had another dumb RPG moment.

After single-handedly defeating scores of goblinish guardsmen to rescue his princess, Sir Althegol burst into her chamber and struck a dramatic pose...only to get his skull smashed in by the ogre who was currently residing there. The princess' cell was on the other side of the hallway (which the DM had pointed out, but which Sir Althegol had forgotten in his romantic fervor, the idiot).

 

[SorvahrSpahr]

that must've been one of those "What the..." moments for the player

 

[Slife]

More of a had to be there moment, but still pretty stupid.

So the semi-neutral party is interrogating one of the halfings who broke into their brewery and had a wild party, trashing the place. They've tortured him a bit, and he's starting to spill the beans

Pc1: Where are the others
Halfing: They're -
Pc2: *Slap*
Halfling: All right, I'm telling you they're -
Pc2: *Slap*
Player 1: Stop slapping the halfling.
Player 2: No. I slap him again. It's in character. I'm roleplaying.
GM: What's your alignment?
Player 2: Chaotic good.

 

[Lalalei2001]

Ok, so Causabon accidently cut off the head of an old man's assisstant, the only one who could tell us where he had gone. The town was going to search the old man's house the next day becasue they were worried about the old man, so we had to hide the body. Avo and Causaon snuck the body out of the center of town and into the woods.

We got a half mile into the woods. Did I mention we had quartered the body to make it easier to move? The rest of the party was disgusted and stayed behind, so there was just 2 of us. The smell of carnage drew wolves, 12 uber-dire wolves. Did I mention we were in Ravenloft?

No problem, Causabon has a nifty chaos bag. He reaches in and pulls out...a hole! It must be a hole to somewhere so Causabon yells "Avo, in the hole!" and jumps in, followed by the fighter. It was a hole that was 200 feet deep.