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D&D General Suggested executions for when your dice commit capital offenses


A Title Much Cooler Than Anything on the Old Site
I just use the bad dice for when you're DMing.

There's four grades of dice:

1. As DM for fodder
2. As DM for boss fight
3. As player for normal use
4. As player for boss fight

2 and 3 are basically the same, but you've got to keep them separate so as not to confuse things.
But I still get to execute the inconsistent ones, right?

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Executed mine with petrol plus ignition then used a hammer.

I made the other dice watch and turned all the ones one the d6 towards the spectacle. Had help from my players.

Aged 18 or so.


Victoria Rules
Probably apocryphal… but I have heard tell of a player who used to execute the offending die by melting it down in the microwave.

And forced all his other dice to watch, as a lesson to them all.
A couple of players I knew used to do the same thing, only it was on the back steps using a blowtorch.

Yes, the steps were made of concrete...




Title? I don't need no stinkin' title.
Y'all have it wrong. With dice, it's about faith and trust. If you have faith in your dice, not giving up on them, not telling them they are "bad" dice their trust in you will grow. A die that does not trust itself will never perform optimally, it will always be looking over it's shoulder looking at the cold hammer of doom.

Faith is rewarded with performance, as my players can attest when I roll yet another 20. Occasionally they test my faith with a series of bad rolls but the series is always short lived.

Of course if this doesn't work, they go into the pile of dice that people can use if they forgot their dice at home. I'm religious about my faith in dice, I'm not stupid. ;)


So, I went through a phase where I always played with a carefully curated set of high-precision metal dice.

The problem is that it is too expensive to punish said dice for bad behavior, especially when only capital punishment fits the crime.

So, I'm thinking of going back to cheap dice from the bulk game-store dice bins so I an affordably indulge my sadistic, DM power trips, and my random-number-generating minions who disappoint me.

What are the best capital punishments for dice. I don't mean temporary punishments like freezing them in ice, putting them in a time-out box, or other soft treatments unworthy of an evil egomaniacal tyrant.

Some come easily to mind:

  • smashing with a hammer is an oldie but goodie, nothing creative about this, but it is satisfying
  • slowly tightening in a vice until crushed--now that's getting into the spirt
  • projecting it with a wrist-rocket-style slingshot at a hard surface or into a lake...hard to ensure destruction, though, and there is a risk of ricochet injuries (best delegate this to a player).
  • use a Dremel to sand off all the numbers, drill holes into it, and circular saw it in half
  • drill a hole through it and string onto a necklace to be worn when running games as a continued warning to your other dice
  • throw into a rock-polisher until it is a marble
  • melt it down with an acetylene torch, something about a welding mask shouts modern-day executioner

Please help me increase this list. I have so many dice to execute.
I love the one with the possibility of injuring the players in the process. Well done, sir.


A Title Much Cooler Than Anything on the Old Site
Not sure I like the direction this thread is going. Civilized, enlightened, rehabilitation... Did I find myself on some parallel Internet dimension?

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