The mid-lifer schedule crunch

[freebfrost]

FYI, I've tried plugging the gaps between sessions with some on-line role-play via Internet forums, but we don't get enough participation to make that a reliable alternative.

I've found having a good forum is the best way to keep my players in touch and informed between sessions. We are in the same boat - a group of late thirty-somethings with family, jobs, and kids, and we're lucky to get together twice a month. So the board adds a lot of depth and provides an outlet for in-game discussions as well as out-of-game talk.

Are some of your group not very internet active? Do they not like the forum you use? What is preventing them from participating?

I also try to post a session journal after each game, so that everyone can review what has happened and ask any questions about that or previous games. It also keeps everyone up-to-date on locations, events, NPCs, etc.

You could also do mailed newsletters for this to keep the non-internet players more in the loop.

 

[scourger]

Here's what worked for me with our group.

First, design the RPG around the concept that players will miss. I was frustrated when I ran D&D or other RPGs and players didn't show up to play. I game with friends, which can make it feel even more personal. But it isn't. People want and need other activities. And they may just not like the current game. So, I designed my last two games around the idea that people will miss some sessions. For me, it meant going to different RPG systems; but I think it could be done with D&D. It is a little more challenging since D&D assumes a certain number of players and character classes, but I think it is possible. A city-based or ship-board campaign is a good way to set episodic, mission-based play. Even an army unit makes a good basis for characters to rotate in and out as players show and cancel from week to week. The characters whose players show up go on the current adventure or mission. Those that are absent stay at home, on the ship or at headquarters (or whatever). The important thing is that the present player characters finish the session and return to base. Then, whoever shows next time gets to play.

Second, make the RPG easy to run. I find that I can sustain a game much longer if it is easy for me to run. Again, I had to go to other systems for ease of play; but any game can be simplified. Some work keeps me engaged as a GM, but it easy to get overwhelmed. Savage Worlds was nice & easy. Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay is less so but has its own good points to compensate.

Third, schedule RPG time and stick to it. We play on Thursday nights. Sometimes we change a night or skip a week, but we're pretty steady. This year, we'll get about 60%-65% of weekly RPG time; and that includes a two-month summer break. Not bad considering all the other demands on our time.

Fourth, have back-up games. Keep some non-RPGs on hand just in case. I like the B-movie card games from Z-Man games. A friend loves the Zombies! line of games. A couple of weeks ago, it threated to be just two of us, so we broke out a non-RPG. A third arrived, so we decided to play our regular RPG. But, we were having fun in any event.

Fifth, don't be afraid to take a hiatus. The two-month break we took over summer was somewhat caused by some lethargy in our group. My currnet RPG stalled a couple of weeks, which was not a good sign. I think we all needed a break. Some vacations cemented it. I was concerned at first, but everyone was rearing to go when we all got back together. I used to the time to almost completely shut off my gaming activities. I didn't even read or post here & elsewhere for over a month. I didn't open the bag containing the RPG books. It was refreshing.

Some of this advice is echoes, but it is what works for me.

 

[buzz]

I'm currently in three biweekly groups; I'm married, but I do not have kids. With only two exceptions, everyone in my groups is married, and maybe a third of them have kids.

Schedule a consistent time to game

This is vital. All of my groups set up schedules at the beginning of the year and map out the sessions for the next twelve months, e.g., "biweekly starting on Jan 7" or whatever. Having a set schedule makes it much easier to plan around the obligations of adulthood. Honestly, nobody who isn't still in college can typically game at the drop of a hat. The more advance notice and regularity, the better the odds of consistent attendance.

Also, biweekly seems to be a lot easier to manage than weekly. I think for most employed, married folk, a weekly game is just too big a time commitment. Odds are people will end up missing enough games that it'll feel like a biweekly game anyway.

(My groups were also nice enough to cluster their schedules around the same weekends, so I get all my gaming in on the same "weekend" (Fri, Sat, and Mon), with a two-week break between each. This has made being a good husband much easier. )

I really like edemaitre's idea that the regular attendees get the majority of the story/plot attention while the folks who miss more often take on "supporting roles."

This is also critical. Unless you're playing a style of game where a missing player is easy to work around, it's vital that everyone be honest about who are the "regulars" and who are not. If there's a player who always seems to have to drop out at the last minute (or you are that player), do not let them play a vital PC role. In D&D terms, absolutely do not let that guy play, say, the only cleric in the party. If he doesn't show, your party is either going to get hammered, or else someone will get stuck having to run the guy's PC. The player needs to just put their ego aside and do what's best for the group.

 

[Ogrork the Mighty]

Over the years I've found that keeping a DM's copy of PC character sheets is immensely helpful. I have a custom excel version that I use and I have everyone fill it out and update it from time to time (and whenever they won't be making the next game). That has proved invaluable in enabling me (as the DM) to run absent players' characters.

I've also found there to be a momentum thing when it comes to game scheduling. If you play sporadically, chances are you're gaming time will continue to drop. If you play more, you play more. So try to schedule as often as possible. Setting a particular day is great if you can do it. We also try to schedule close to a month in advance.

Electronic aids. We set up a bulletin board that we use regularly and everyone communicates via email. Keeping interests up is important.

 

[talien]

Just to add to this:

I handle all the character sheets using e-tools. I'm also the DM, so at any point in time I have access to all the characters if we need them (although this is rare). It also means nobody can forget their character sheet.

PLAY RPGA ADVENTURES. I can't emphasize this enough. Here's why.
1) RPGA adventures are meant for between four and five hours of play. This is perfect for a busy adult who doesn't have the flexibility to game eight hours (I can't believe I used to play several eight-hour blocks in a ROW!).
2) RPGA adventures are instantly scaleable. Every adventure has different challenge ratings for each encounter, usually in a range of two up or down from the recommend level. So in other words, you can play the adventure for 5th level Average Party Level (APL) or for 3rd, 4th, 6th, and 7th. So if you don't have enough players, adjust the APL down (you subtract one from the APL when you have fewer players). This means the adventure is always ready to be used regardless of the party size and structure.

Hope that helps!

 

[Eridanis]

Another vote for keeping a consistent schedule, here. My wife and I are the worst schedule offenders, since we have kids, and the others do not. However, all of us know that Chuck's game (six players) is the first Saturday of every month, and Adam's game (seven players) is the last Saturday of every month, and people can either make those days or the game will go on without them. If too many people can't make a date, then the group can decide whetehr to make it a different date, skip the month altogether, or play the backup campaign (Age of Worms with gestalt characters). We're lucky that we have two regular campaigns that are fun and long-lasting (coming up on three years, now), so a missed month doesn't mean that our interest is going to wane.

 

[TheNovaLord]

Just to add to this:

PLAY RPGA ADVENTURES.

Hope that helps!

we have just started to do this, to get through a number of people on long holiday trips and to cover inevitable gaps during the christmas season.

All self contained and hours arent wasted on 'shopping', though obviously some NPC banter is lost as a result

JohnD

 

[Lalato]

Boardgames! I would suggest games that require group interaction like...

Arkham Horror
Betrayal at House on the Hill
Descent

And other games of that ilk... Good luck!
--sam

 

[WayneLigon]

As a member of a group that is all post-30, with careers and (save for me) children ranging from newborn to teenager, let me say that scheduling a game is possible if everyone commits to it being as important as any other recreation activity. We game on Fridays every week without fail save for major illness claiming two or more members, or if game night happens to fall on an anniversary, Thanksgiving or New Years. And even then we'll simply reschedule. One couple even drive almost an hour to come play.

If your spouse has a problem with it? I'll say that if he or she cannot be parted from you for 4-5 hours once a week, you have a larger problem than trying to schedule for gaming.

If they simply don't like you going off to 'waste time', sit them down and explain that not every hour of every day has to be spent doing something productive and that recreational downtime is just as important. They must have something they like doing that you don't like as much, but do anyway. They need to see that your need is as important as theirs. Relationship = give and take. Again, their problem, not yours.

If they don't like that you game, then explain to them that it's just as important to your recreational social life as something they do. If they don't have any hobbies they like doing other than 'watch TV', then again, they have a problem, not you.

 

[Tinker]

Not helpful, I just want to whinge...

I live in London, England.

I had a group of 5 players. My wife and 2 other couples. None of us have kids btw. One couple moved to Cornwall. That's about 3 hours by train, for you non-UK readers.

The other couple went to spend 2 years in Rwanda.

I haven't DMed since then.

On the bright side the Warhammer group I play in is finally getting together for a big campaign finale this weekend, after several years of gaming once-in-months.

You think you have it bad, you don't know how lucky you are. Once a month? Luxury! When ah were a lad, Father used to spring fatal traps on us, wi' no saving throw. (that's a Monty Python gag for you under-30s).