Who is Gilbert Grape Eating?



There also might be a need for Fey-on-a-stick vendors. Continual Flame and an insulated pushcart should get that done. Bet you can't eat just one!

Let us expand a bit on your D&D snackbar wagon, what other creatures yould come served on a stick?

- Halfling on a stick (For the big hunger or if you are a troll :p)

  • The classic rat on a stick
  • bat on a stick
Lets just simplify and enhance those two:

Familiar on a stick! It comes in a multitude of flavours: Spider, Toad, imp, beholderling etc.

Now lets get mean when we are already at it:
Kobe unicorn tenderloin served with horn, the gourmet uses the horn instead of a fork, a real healthy diet
Dryad of the season
Kuo-toa flavoured instant noodles
Barbecue summon: Whatever gets conjured ends on the grill
Dungeon meat: This one comes canned .... You might need that unicorn horn after the meal though (As an universal antiseptic and a toothpick).


Sir Loin of Beef
the Red Lobster, rarely-mentioned sidekick of the Scarlet Pimpernel
Betty Crocker
General Mills - his army chews its way through the enemy
Liquor Ish, a candy store
The witch from Hansel and Gretel with the edible (gingerbread? and candy) house is a major villain in the adventure
One of the gods is known for causing manna to appear all over the ground overnight
I think Elf is too delicate to be grilled and served on a bun. Maybe a quick sear on both sides and then something in a light lemon cream sauce? Yeah, that'd do it. Garden veg on the side, and cauliflower mash. Pair with a sweet fruity white from the Southern Realms.

Halfling though, that was born to be in a burger. Slightly gamey, nicely marbled, and generally beer marinated. Grind in a little smoked bacon and lightly season. Mmmm. I'd probably go pretzel bun and handcut fries to round it out. Pair this one with a pint of Bruenor's Best Dark Ale (seasonally available).

And for dessert? Candied Brownies.


Tieflings naturally taste flaming-hot. Serve with bread (whole loaves), bleu cheese and ranch dressing.
Except the tieflings that taste like, ahem, deviled ham.


Staff member
Myconid is best served sautéed in butter with green onion and whole garlic cloves, on a bed of cheese-stuffed pasta.


Staff member
Wouldn’t Athasian halflings enjoy Gi-Kreen-Mul? (A Half-giant stuffed with a Thri-kreen stuffed with a Mul; baked.)


Staff member
A setting like this might have some interesting culinary aphorisms. For instance, their version of Emeril Legasse might claim, “Orc fat rules!”


Staff member
Margaret Chorizo
Soy Behar
Lamb Neeson
Veal Patrick Harris
Cheez-wiz Khalifa
Pat Mojito
Cherry J-Lo
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Scruffy and Determined
excuse my weebness, but...
thread: haha food-themed names because cannibalism
older manga artists: food-themed names because WHAT?!

but if I have to contribute something, then... Hammibal Lecter, yeah I'm not good at this.


Wouldn’t Athasian halflings enjoy Gi-Kreen-Mul? (A Half-giant stuffed with a Thri-kreen stuffed with a Mul; baked.)
No. Thri-Kreen are covered in armor-quality chitin and do not stuff into anything.

However a Halfling might be able to use the chest cavity as an impromptu oven for some other dish.