Winter IrondDM (Winner)!
MerakSpielman
First Post
my money's on Wicht this round.
incognito
First Post
Round , set 1
Judging ( Nifft vs. Wicht)
Ok, there will be a direct correlation between the rounds, and how harsh I am when the contestants under whelm me with submission. Since this is the first round, first set, I am going to be positively benign.
I do have 1 general complaint – and Greybar guessed it right off the bat - Bright Llama. Maybe I should have used an adjective besides bright – like unobtrusive, or dignified. I might have gotten a less tacked on feel in both Wicht, and Nifft’s submissions. It amazes me that posters can come up with their own Challenging Riddle, but not use a Llama in anything but comic relief – and that is how this ingredient struck me in both submissions.
I’ll start with Wicht, because he submitted first…
Wicht has a tendency to craft scenario’s which are less than dark, even though their content is meant to be taken seriously --> the setting often belies this purpose. Take for example, the deity used to set the scene; Ferfinigu, who is foppish enough that I might have thought one of the ingredients was self indulgent deity. The sphinx analogy Llama is another comical point, although I am not sure if this was intended. Of course you can see a DM telling players “you see before you, a Llama! shining like the sun – it wants to ask you a riddle…” and the subsequent south park laughter.
Ingredient weakness in Wicht’s adventure: I have to say, at the risk of being over-critical, that they ALL seemed tacked on. Why is the captain kept prisoner with Iron Bands of Billaro? because it is an ingredient, no other reason. Why do Xill attack the city? Why not fiendish, Dire Llama’s or Awakened, Llama Wizards? I am also not sure I like the implied sarcasm in Fretch’s mercy killing. I think that may be just a personal preference though, other times the use of ingredients in an unusual way has tickled my fancy. Finally, what is the deal with the sword and shield – they were like an adventure thread that never materialized – perhaps Wicht meant to use them as a plot hook? We’ll hopefully find out in his exposition…
So, what to like? Well, we have three distinct, hooks, an unusual minor deity, the potential for some interesting combats at the PCs dash about the city, and a riddle that a person with a 100 (average) IQ might actually figure out – ‘cause other wise that Dire Llama might stomp the crap out of a party not well equiped with +3 weapons (and hey, that **would** be funny!)
I also do not find too many PC spell holes that ruin this adventure, a considerable risk, at the levels creep up (perhaps a reason that so many submission are for characters of 3-6th level.
Speaking of spells ruining you plot hooks, let’s more over to Niffts submission!
Nifft, nifft, nifft. So many spells, so little time. If the Efreeti has access to clerical magic, via the “commune” spell, why does he not cast “speak with dead” on Tchakrix’s followers. Oh, and “commune” does not provide riddles, just yes or no, (up to five words as well) – but the 4th level spell “divination” does. Looks like Nikret could saved some coin on that, eh? Speaking of divinations, what savvy L9 cleric PC isn’t going to cast “Commune” and ask if Tchakrix did it? Could be a short adventure. Stupid divination magic!
Perlfive has to be some kind of computer humor as well…I can’t remember what the exact joke is though, and worse still, NIfft used his lantern disciple, custom PrC to flesh out this already unusual Llama. Overkill, perhaps.
On the other hand, I found the ingredient use in this adventure quite wonderful! Xill, and Efreet, are both Lawful Evil outsiders, and would respect a pact. The Challenging Riddle is exactly that, and I find it a great one to come up with in 24 hours (hat’s off to Nifft!), and the mercy killing “feels” genuine. I buy into the fatherly efreet – he even willing to grant wishes that might screw himself over – esp. if the PCs have already talked with the Llama. The smoke filled room, although perfectly sensical in the body of the story, probably should had more story impact, but it certainly was not contrived, just underused.
One thing that bothers me slightly is the first plot hook, I have a hard time seeing the body of this adventure getting played out (figuring out the mystery of Nikret’s son) if a party of L10 characters has contact with the Llama first– god I hate Nifft’s Llama - I do like the fact that there is the possibility of the conundrum with PCs possibly wishing Nikret to leave, but him needing to offer that as a gift in order to save him son. Good stuff that!
The potential for role-play: decent. This adventure is certainly not all hack and slash.
Anyone who knows me might have guessed the victor. I found Niffts entry to be exciting, AND interesting, with good use of several ingredients, and only one that really offended me (wink). I found Wicht’s to be surprisingly average, with not enough thought given to making the ingredient use seem integrated, rather than superfluous.
This round goes to
Nifft!
Judging ( Nifft vs. Wicht)
Ok, there will be a direct correlation between the rounds, and how harsh I am when the contestants under whelm me with submission. Since this is the first round, first set, I am going to be positively benign.
I do have 1 general complaint – and Greybar guessed it right off the bat - Bright Llama. Maybe I should have used an adjective besides bright – like unobtrusive, or dignified. I might have gotten a less tacked on feel in both Wicht, and Nifft’s submissions. It amazes me that posters can come up with their own Challenging Riddle, but not use a Llama in anything but comic relief – and that is how this ingredient struck me in both submissions.
I’ll start with Wicht, because he submitted first…
Wicht has a tendency to craft scenario’s which are less than dark, even though their content is meant to be taken seriously --> the setting often belies this purpose. Take for example, the deity used to set the scene; Ferfinigu, who is foppish enough that I might have thought one of the ingredients was self indulgent deity. The sphinx analogy Llama is another comical point, although I am not sure if this was intended. Of course you can see a DM telling players “you see before you, a Llama! shining like the sun – it wants to ask you a riddle…” and the subsequent south park laughter.
Ingredient weakness in Wicht’s adventure: I have to say, at the risk of being over-critical, that they ALL seemed tacked on. Why is the captain kept prisoner with Iron Bands of Billaro? because it is an ingredient, no other reason. Why do Xill attack the city? Why not fiendish, Dire Llama’s or Awakened, Llama Wizards? I am also not sure I like the implied sarcasm in Fretch’s mercy killing. I think that may be just a personal preference though, other times the use of ingredients in an unusual way has tickled my fancy. Finally, what is the deal with the sword and shield – they were like an adventure thread that never materialized – perhaps Wicht meant to use them as a plot hook? We’ll hopefully find out in his exposition…
So, what to like? Well, we have three distinct, hooks, an unusual minor deity, the potential for some interesting combats at the PCs dash about the city, and a riddle that a person with a 100 (average) IQ might actually figure out – ‘cause other wise that Dire Llama might stomp the crap out of a party not well equiped with +3 weapons (and hey, that **would** be funny!)
I also do not find too many PC spell holes that ruin this adventure, a considerable risk, at the levels creep up (perhaps a reason that so many submission are for characters of 3-6th level.Speaking of spells ruining you plot hooks, let’s more over to Niffts submission!
Nifft, nifft, nifft. So many spells, so little time. If the Efreeti has access to clerical magic, via the “commune” spell, why does he not cast “speak with dead” on Tchakrix’s followers. Oh, and “commune” does not provide riddles, just yes or no, (up to five words as well) – but the 4th level spell “divination” does. Looks like Nikret could saved some coin on that, eh? Speaking of divinations, what savvy L9 cleric PC isn’t going to cast “Commune” and ask if Tchakrix did it? Could be a short adventure. Stupid divination magic!
Perlfive has to be some kind of computer humor as well…I can’t remember what the exact joke is though, and worse still, NIfft used his lantern disciple, custom PrC to flesh out this already unusual Llama. Overkill, perhaps.
On the other hand, I found the ingredient use in this adventure quite wonderful! Xill, and Efreet, are both Lawful Evil outsiders, and would respect a pact. The Challenging Riddle is exactly that, and I find it a great one to come up with in 24 hours (hat’s off to Nifft!), and the mercy killing “feels” genuine. I buy into the fatherly efreet – he even willing to grant wishes that might screw himself over – esp. if the PCs have already talked with the Llama. The smoke filled room, although perfectly sensical in the body of the story, probably should had more story impact, but it certainly was not contrived, just underused.
One thing that bothers me slightly is the first plot hook, I have a hard time seeing the body of this adventure getting played out (figuring out the mystery of Nikret’s son) if a party of L10 characters has contact with the Llama first– god I hate Nifft’s Llama - I do like the fact that there is the possibility of the conundrum with PCs possibly wishing Nikret to leave, but him needing to offer that as a gift in order to save him son. Good stuff that!
The potential for role-play: decent. This adventure is certainly not all hack and slash.
Anyone who knows me might have guessed the victor. I found Niffts entry to be exciting, AND interesting, with good use of several ingredients, and only one that really offended me (wink). I found Wicht’s to be surprisingly average, with not enough thought given to making the ingredient use seem integrated, rather than superfluous.
This round goes to
Nifft!
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Quickbeam
Explorer
** Congrats to Nifft.
** I'm ready whenever someone else chimes in, and I'd love to start tonight if possible.
** And at the risk of upsetting our judge, I'm not surprised the bright llama was used "weakly" or as "comic relief" in the entires posted by Wicht and Nifft. It's not exactly an inspiring ingredient, now is it? I mean, when I first read the theme element list I thought, "What the heck does he mean by bright llama? Is this some new creature from BoVD? or ToH?" Incognito, I understand the challenge you (and nemmerle) face in coming up with unrelated and often unusual story ingredients for us to use. But you must understand that some ingredients just beg to be used in silly ways, like kazoos from the Holiday Iron DM tourney. It's damn hard to take llamas seriously.
I mean you no disrespect and I hope you don't penalize me for speaking my mind herein. I take this tournament very seriously, but that doesn't mean an odd ingredient can't be used to provide comedy in an otherwise thrilling adventure story. You're saddled with the task of providing us with unique theme elements (and judging), while we're asked to employ them in a clever, cohesive, compelling manner. Sometimes (like with llamas and kazoos) that's mighty hard to do without a silent wink wink, nudge nudge.
** I'm ready whenever someone else chimes in, and I'd love to start tonight if possible.
** And at the risk of upsetting our judge, I'm not surprised the bright llama was used "weakly" or as "comic relief" in the entires posted by Wicht and Nifft. It's not exactly an inspiring ingredient, now is it? I mean, when I first read the theme element list I thought, "What the heck does he mean by bright llama? Is this some new creature from BoVD? or ToH?" Incognito, I understand the challenge you (and nemmerle) face in coming up with unrelated and often unusual story ingredients for us to use. But you must understand that some ingredients just beg to be used in silly ways, like kazoos from the Holiday Iron DM tourney. It's damn hard to take llamas seriously
.I mean you no disrespect and I hope you don't penalize me for speaking my mind herein. I take this tournament very seriously, but that doesn't mean an odd ingredient can't be used to provide comedy in an otherwise thrilling adventure story. You're saddled with the task of providing us with unique theme elements (and judging), while we're asked to employ them in a clever, cohesive, compelling manner. Sometimes (like with llamas and kazoos) that's mighty hard to do without a silent wink wink, nudge nudge
.
incognito
First Post
I am leaving work now, please post exposition
Round 1, set 2 begin's tomorrow, around 9:30 AM EST!
Who can make it (Quickbeam)?
Oh, and just to help out with the llama ingredient: How about a llama statuette with bright, glittering diamond eyes? Or, if you want to go the Llama_as_humor route, go all the way! Create other funny animal references, or make all the bad guys wear dunce caps, of have the fighter NPCs wear red shirts (star trek).
3e does not have to be serious, but I do want internal consistency.
An no, Quickbeam, I will not hold it against, you - I'll save that for Nifft
Round 1, set 2 begin's tomorrow, around 9:30 AM EST!
Who can make it (Quickbeam)?
Oh, and just to help out with the llama ingredient: How about a llama statuette with bright, glittering diamond eyes? Or, if you want to go the Llama_as_humor route, go all the way! Create other funny animal references, or make all the bad guys wear dunce caps, of have the fighter NPCs wear red shirts (star trek).
3e does not have to be serious, but I do want internal consistency.
An no, Quickbeam, I will not hold it against, you - I'll save that for Nifft
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Quickbeam
Explorer
I'll be ready tomorrow, although tonight would have been better for me. C'est la vie and all that jazz.
Fair enough, and point well taken. I just wanted to make sure I could have a little fun with some of the ingredients given to me, if the urge hit.
incognito said:
Oh, and just to help out with the llama ingredient: How about a llama statuette with bright, glittering diamond eyes? Or, if you want to go the Llama_as_humor route, go all the way! Create other funny animal references, or make all the bad guys wear dunce caps, of have the fighter NPCs wear red shirts (star trek).
3e does not have to be serious, but I do want internal consistency.
An no, Quickbeam, I will not hold it against, you - I'll save that for Nifft
Fair enough, and point well taken. I just wanted to make sure I could have a little fun with some of the ingredients given to me, if the urge hit
.
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