Your game sucks...

[Agamon]

This has been mentioned a couple of times in this thread. It surprises me that tardiness for a D&D game can be so important. D&D is a time of relaxation and fun; it's not a job. We already have to worry about tardiness with our jobs, I don't really care to worry about being late to hang out with "friends" also.

I honestly don't care when someone is late to a game. I'm perfectly fine waiting on them and talking with whoever is there. I'm there to socialize with friends as much as game with them. 30 minutes is not a big deal to me. I suppose it would be different for a game being held at a store or event. But to be 30 minutes late to a friends house is not an issue with me and if it was a big deal it would make the event much too formal for my tastes.

I have a problem with it. It's a social contract. Games may not be important, but one needs to schedule time around the important stuff, which may not be easy. Its not fair to everyone else, evryone has busy lives, those that don't care aren't any more special than those that go out of their way to make sure they aren't wasting other poeple's time.

If it's just chilling out, I don't care when anyone shows up. But if we're gaming, if you're going to be late, don't bother. One of my pet peeves is someone committing to play a game and then not really taking the commitment seriously.

 

[Pentius]

This has been mentioned a couple of times in this thread. It surprises me that tardiness for a D&D game can be so important. D&D is a time of relaxation and fun; it's not a job. We already have to worry about tardiness with our jobs, I don't really care to worry about being late to hang out with "friends" also.

I honestly don't care when someone is late to a game. I'm perfectly fine waiting on them and talking with whoever is there. I'm there to socialize with friends as much as game with them. 30 minutes is not a big deal to me. I suppose it would be different for a game being held at a store or event. But to be 30 minutes late to a friends house is not an issue with me and if it was a big deal it would make the event much too formal for my tastes.

I care about lateness. It isn't about formality, or D&D being a "job", it's that we schedule games specifically when everyone says they can come, several days to a week in advance. If you tell me, "I will be at this place, at this time." I want you to do it. If something's up, if you're sick, if your kids need you, if traffic's bad, I get that. If you just really needed to spend 15 more minutes messing about, we have a respect issue going on.

Are these actual issues you have dealt with? Are they common with you? I have played with 30+ players in my time and I have never once dealt with any of these issues you mentioned. Some of them are mind boggling.

I'd assume they are. They're things I've seen before. Heck, I remember one game where we finally had to ask a guy to leave, and when the DM picked up his character sheet, he noticed that the only thing filled out was a spell description for Chromatic Orb. 3.5's version. In our 4e game.

No you were not. As the GM if you pull the plug and stop running it, guess what? It stops.

But that's exactly the problem. If Jon pulls the plug, the problem player wins. The game Jon wants to play ends, the game the problem player clearly does not want to play ends.

 

[ExploderWizard]

But that's exactly the problem. If Jon pulls the plug, the problem player wins. The game Jon wants to play ends, the game the problem player clearly does not want to play ends.

Vs. what, continuing to put effort into something that you dread doing because you know all the fun has has been sucked out of it?

Any time I can stop doing something that isn't fun, I win. Keeping a situation like that going will never end in a victory.

 

[Rechan]

This has been mentioned a couple of times in this thread. It surprises me that tardiness for a D&D game can be so important. D&D is a time of relaxation and fun; it's not a job. We already have to worry about tardiness with our jobs, I don't really care to worry about being late to hang out with "friends" also.

I'm setting aside time during my schedule (and for many people, free time is precious and in small supply), and I try very hard to be there and be on time - it's important to me to not leave people waiting. If someone doesn't show the same courtesy/respect, it means to me that they don't care enough about anyone else to make the effort to be there when they said they would.

When it comes to gaming it's a commitment, and it's time sensitive. You're having 4-6 people whose time has to mesh. Usually there's only a short amount of time - I've known people who only have 3 hours to spare for a game. So when someone shows up 45 minutes late, that's at max 2 hours (because it takes 15 minutes for everyone to settle and get into gear).

I understand things outside of someone's control, but when they're late because they flakes, there's no excuse. If someone isn't dependable, they get cut out. Simple as that. In games I've ran, if you miss 3 games in a row (and it's not your health/you're in a move), you're out, period. I have a similar attitude towards chronic lateness.

 

[Umbran]

This has been mentioned a couple of times in this thread. It surprises me that tardiness for a D&D game can be so important. D&D is a time of relaxation and fun; it's not a job.

Yes. But tardiness can cut into everyone's fun.

I run my game on weeknights. So, I cannot just tag an extra hour onto the end of my session is someone's tardy. If you're late, I either have to delay the game for you, shortening the session for everyone, or I have to run without my full compliment of players (which is sub-optimal for everyone), and then stop and recap when you do show up. It's a pain.

In addition, I'm usually providing dinner for the players. So, again, either you're delaying everyone's meal, or you're taking up time once you do arrive to get food. Again, it is a pain.

My group is taking time out of their busy lives to do this. As a player, you are signing on to help make it fun for everyone. That implies at least some basic effort to show up at the right time.

 

[Pentius]

Vs. what, continuing to put effort into something that you dread doing because you know all the fun has has been sucked out of it?

Any time I can stop doing something that isn't fun, I win. Keeping a situation like that going will never end in a victory.

Yes, but again, that's the problem. The desired outcome, if I'm reading it right, was "Having fun with a supers game". The problem player made it so the only choices were "No game" or "Bad game". Thus, pissing in his game. Just like pissing in the cornflakes, you can eat pissy cornflakes or throw them out, but you poured the bowl hoping to eat non-pissy cornflakes.

 

[S'mon]

This has been mentioned a couple of times in this thread. It surprises me that tardiness for a D&D game can be so important. D&D is a time of relaxation and fun; it's not a job. We already have to worry about tardiness with our jobs, I don't really care to worry about being late to hang out with "friends" also.

Do you have wife, kids, a schedule to keep? As GM I can usually work around tardy players, but as a player tardy GMs, or GMs who wait for tardy players, drive me nuts. I don't appreciate losing 1/3 of a 3-hour game slot (which took nearly 2 hours round trip to get to) because someone can't be bothered to turn up/be ready on time.

Hanging out chatting is something to do *before* the appointed start time, and at a stretch for 10-15 minutes after it, not 45 minutes past time.

 

[Oryan77]

Do you have wife, kids, a schedule to keep?

Yes, I do have a wife and a 1 y/o. I also live in the Bay Area, CA where traffic is absolute hell and it isn't uncommon to drive an hour away to game. Which is why tardiness is not a concern to me.

Sometimes I may be 30 minutes late because of my son. Or I might be late coming home from work. Many times I've been stuck in traffic. Other players also have families and live more than 30 minutes away. I am not bothered when they are late. Someone being late in our group is almost a regular occurrence.

I don't just consider my time "precious". Sure, I appreciate when I get some free time to game, but I also appreciate it when that free time to game allows me some free time to hang out with my friends and discuss what we did since we last talked.

I don't know, it's just a pet peeve of my own when I hear someone utter the words "my free time is precious". It's like they put their own life before others regardless of what others have going on as if they are royalty or something. And as I do like to actually play D&D, I can be content to chat it up with my friends while waiting on someone. As long as I get some good gaming time in, I don't care if anyone is 30 minutes late or so.

Now if someone is screwing around playing xbox or something, and is late, ok, that's annoying. But people in this thread don't seem to be specifying that. They seem to be annoyed about tardiness regardless because their time is precious and they can't be bothered to actually socialize with people for 30 extra minutes.

 

[Bedrockgames]

I find as I get older it gets harder for everyone to schedule games. We just have more responsibilities and more people in our lives (spouses, kids, ailing parents) that need us. If people are late or cant make it because of these things that isn't a problem for me at all.

 

[Dice4Hire]

Now if someone is screwing around playing xbox or something, and is late, ok, that's annoying. But people in this thread don't seem to be specifying that. They seem to be annoyed about tardiness regardless because their time is precious and they can't be bothered to actually socialize with people for 30 extra minutes.

Well if socializing is above gaming for you then I don't see the problem.

But I do understand people who want to game. I can socialize with one guy and it is easy to mesh two schedules. But to game I need at least 3-4 and that is harder. Go up to a bigger group of 7-8 and it is much harder. I can understand why people who are set to game want to game.