D&D General Reminder: Spellfire can come out of any body part…

[DarkCrisis]

…according to the creator of The Forgotten Realms.

You see, I’ve started reading the old old FRs novel: Spellfire. Written by Ed Greenwood.

A fresh on the job 16 year waif of a girl goes on her first adventure and ends up being able to channel Spellfire (primal spell blasts by way of Dragonball Z)

Elminster tells this young lady that when she lets loose it will come out of her eyes and/or mouth and/or hands.

So she starts going all DBZ on the bad guys and as blasts are coming out of her mouth and hands, I kid you not, rips her shirt open and adds breast blasts to the barrage.

Dot dot dot.

This is a weird fricking story. And it’s the first of a trilogy.

Edit: I have been made aware he probably meant "Chest" not "Boobs". Also, 2nd half of the book is pretty good.

 

[Haplo781]

Greenwood has always been a perv.

 

[Seramus]

Greenwood has always been a perv.

As his wife has happily mentioned many times on Candlekeep.

 

[Paul Farquhar]

I thought it came out of Ed Greenwood's backside.

 

[Andvari]

Greenwood Novels = Young woman becomes a powerful spell caster.
Except Elminster who is male until a god turns him into a young woman who becomes a powerful spell caster.

Edit: Actually not true as some of the FR novels I'm thinking of weren't by him. Consider it my homebrew version of Ed Greenwood.

 

[EzekielRaiden]

Wait, so you mean you COULD shoot spellfire from your hindquarters?! (That's probably a safer joke than the one I originally intended.)

 

[Stormonu]

Wait, so you mean you COULD shoot spellfire from your hindquarters?! (That's probably a safer joke than the one I originally intended.)

William Wallace lightning bolts, eh?

 

[toucanbuzz]

Lol, yep. Been awhile since I cracked that open but there it is, in all its glory:

Shandril laughed. Her blazing fingers found the throat of her tunic and ripped it open. From her bared breast poured out spellfire as she backed down the tunnel. Rock cracked and burst into fragments.

 

[Steampunkette]

The more I read about the earliest creators of D&D and their attitudes well into the 2000s towards... literally any minority group...

The more I realize they'd have hated me for existing in their spaces and for all the kindness they might smear over that hatred in favor of the illusion that everyone is equal at their table it just makes me super uncomfortable.

Thank the universe for EN World and other spaces that actively push back against bigotry and do not tolerate it.

 

[DarkCrisis]

The more I read about the earliest creators of D&D and their attitudes well into the 2000s towards... literally any minority group...

The more I realize they'd have hated me for existing in their spaces and for all the kindness they might smear over that hatred in favor of the illusion that everyone is equal at their table it just makes me super uncomfortable.

Thank the universe for EN World and other spaces that actively push back against bigotry and do not tolerate it.

I wouldn’t go so far to call this something that is hateful. Not to say you are wrong about the “boomer attitude”.

It’s definitely juvenile and sexist but it’s also really really horribly written. Like amateur hour. And definitely trying to appeal to the core reader at the time… boys.

I mean, In this spellfire scene she obliterates like 100 cultists and a dracolich just by walking towards them and “I’m firing my laser!” And she’s been adventuring for like a week. (Man the xp she’s about to gain…)

While the boob beam thing is very stupid (the most juvenile and sexist so far) it’s a drop in the bucket to the rest of it and how badly written it is and I’m like half way in.