D&D 5E We Would Hate A BG3 Campaign

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The whole point of compromise is that both sides get something they can live with. And the first step in that is having a dialogue about what they actually want.

The DM really hates dragons for some reason, dragons don’t exist in the setting? If the reason I want to play a dragonborn is the cool mechanics, maybe I can use the mechanics of the dragonborn and just play a human circus performer who can breathe fire once per short rest. No more or less ridiculous than a wizard, right?

The DM hates the dragonborn mechanics with a passion. If I happen to think dragons are cool but don’t care about the mechanics, than my character can be a dragonborn (mechanically a lizardfolk) sorcerer and take the dragon breath spell to breath fire.
Hey if a wizard can toss chickens as magic missiles....
 

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It's only a problem if the person wants to play something at my table I don't allow and they argue about it. It's their choice, but the DM has the final say as far as I'm concerned.

But if you're okay DM hunting until you find what they want, more power to you.
When is DM hunting season?
How much is the license?
Do you issue tags?
What is my yearly limit?
Can I hunt them with a bow?
Can I hunt them with a crow?
 

When is DM hunting season?
How much is the license?
Do you issue tags?
What is my yearly limit?
Can I hunt them with a bow?
Can I hunt them with a crow?
Just when is DM hunting season?
Will it feature rhyme or reason?
What cost to pay to get a license?
Will I need to bring a nice lense?
Does the source now issue tags?
Does the source now count my bags?
What's the top, the yearly limit?
Do you know or will you 'stimit?
Can I hunt them, with a bow?
Can I hunt them, with a crow?
Can I hunt them, from my car?
Can I hunt them, near or far?
All these things I need to know
For DM hunting I must go.
 

When is DM hunting season?
How much is the license?
Do you issue tags?
What is my yearly limit?
Can I hunt them with a bow?
Can I hunt them with a crow?
I find that promises of snacks and potentially beverages works best. Typically the best hunting grounds I've found is on meetup.org.
 

The player backed down and let the DM's word be final. I have seen this happen many times and in each case, the group dynamic was not strained, and the campaign went on and all had a good time, including the player whose request was denied.
I have seen exactly the opposite happen. In multiple cases, the DM's denial was directly responsible for straining the group dynamic, and it led to further and further strain until the campaign broke.

I have seen this far more often with 5e than any previous system.
 


I have seen exactly the opposite happen. In multiple cases, the DM's denial was directly responsible for straining the group dynamic, and it led to further and further strain until the campaign broke.

I have seen this far more often with 5e than any previous system.
Why do you think that is? Is it an issue with 5e, or people who play 5e?
 

However, if you find yourself at odds with a DM who tells you, "no, you can't do that" the outcomes are as follows:
  • Humbly accept the ruling and continue in the game. You are very likely to have a good time anyway.
  • Insist you be allowed to do it anyway, appealing to the group if necessary. You will soon have no campaign (either the campaign will fold or you will appeal, lose, and be asked to leave the group) and also run the risk of alienating most of the people at the table.

Based on the possible final outcomes that bubble out of the above choices, it seems to me that unless you are in a truly remarkable situation (as mentioned above, an example would be a group of very experienced players where everyone takes it in turn to DM for a month or so making the DM role a shared responsibility) the best course of action for the long term health of the campaign as a player is to humbly accept the ruling and move on, and the best course of action for the long term health of the campaign as a DM to take is to stand your ground and refuse the player's request - as every time I've seen something else tried over the past 40 years and over a dozen gaming groups (not just D&D but multiple TTRPGs), it has always led to the quick death of the campaign at hand and often resulted in bad feelings among the players - just a negative experience all around
Is this not what I repeatedly said was demanded?

"Meekly submit, and you will always be happy. Show any defiance, and you will be a destructive saboteur who is personally responsible for ruining not just your experience, but everyone's experience."

Is there any wonder why I responded as I did? This is saying the quiet part out loud! But no, I was the monster here. I was the problem. I was somehow saying things I had explicitly rejected. I was advocating for something horrible and stupid and dangerous.
 

At least, not for them. That's the thing: one unhappy player does not necessarily make a bad game, but an unhappy DM does.
You have clearly not had that many groups where a player was having an actively bad time. Negative energy can very quickly metastasize. Especially if it comes from something one or more players see as inflexible, obstinate behavior on the DM's part.
 

I have seen this far more often with 5e than any previous system.
well, there are far more 5e players than for any previous system too ;)

EDIT: Wait, are you saying you frequently see groups being strained by the DM rejecting a player's request in the groups you are a player in? :D
 
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