The problem isn’t that fantasy realistic doesn’t track actual reality. The problem is two-fold:
1. GMs that claim their actions are constrained by realism, when the broad nature of fantasy realism means that it isn’t a meaningful constraint on their actions; and
2. GMs that point to fantasy realism as a justification for actions they have taken, when it is essentially a non-falsifiable position, since anything can be justified in fantasy realism.
A good example of the second point is the NPC with the conviction that they refuse to drink alcohol. It started out as an example of an unshakeable conviction an NPC might have. When
@soviet tested the conviction, pointing out that it would mean that the NPC would refuse to drink alcohol even if he or his family were tortured
that’s when fantasy realism was invoked, creating lore to justify why an NPC would refuse to drink alcohol even if his family were tortured. This is the opposite of what traditional play is claimed to be: the trait is supposed to follow from the lore, the lore isn’t supposed to be created to justify the trait.