Pineapple Express: Someone Is Wrong on the Internet?

[dragoner]

Kind of like car insurance where the vehicle isn't covered for damages by civil war, or acts of God.

 

[Maxperson]

In cases like that my character falls on his sword and dies instantly. Walk away.

That reminds me of this kid(we were in junior high) I played with back in 1e. If he rolled really badly on character stats he would announce to the DM that his character would buy some rope and walk to a nearby bridge, then tie a rock to his leg and jump into the river.

 

[Maxperson]

Kind of like car insurance where the vehicle isn't covered for damages by civil war, or acts of God.

What about your sports team winning the championship?

 

[dragoner]

What about your sports team winning the championship?

I think that would be vandalism.

 

[dragoner]

It started raining frogs, then my car was destroyed! Though I would guess in the past the government would declare something an "act of God" and that is where that makes it into the boilerplate of the document.

 

[Maxperson]

I think that would be vandalism.

Depending on the team, some might call it an act of God.

 

[Scribe]

Supposed to be working this weekend. Client didnt send me data.

Thats not how this can work people!

 

[RealAlHazred]

That reminds me of this kid(we were in junior high) I played with back in 1e. If he rolled really badly on character stats he would announce to the DM that his character would buy some rope and walk to a nearby bridge, then tie a rock to his leg and jump into the river.

"Unfortunately, your character is so bad at things due to his low stats, that the rope becomes undone and you float to the surface, unconscious. There, you are found by goblin minions of the BBEG for the next encounter, who bring you to their camp. When the rest of the PCs arrive, you have just undone the ropes they tied you up with. Yes, while unconscious. Please roll initiative!"

 

[payn]

"Unfortunately, your character is so bad at things due to his low stats, that the rope becomes undone and you float to the surface, unconscious. There, you are found by goblin minions of the BBEG for the next encounter, who bring you to their camp. When the rest of the PCs arrive, you have just undone the ropes they tied you up with. Yes, while unconscious. Please roll initiative!"

Rocks fall, but you don’t die.

 

[overgeeked]

"Unfortunately, your character is so bad at things due to his low stats, that the rope becomes undone and you float to the surface, unconscious. There, you are found by goblin minions of the BBEG for the next encounter, who bring you to their camp. When the rest of the PCs arrive, you have just undone the ropes they tied you up with. Yes, while unconscious. Please roll initiative!"

Or, better yet, “Okay your PC is dead. Please gather your stuff and leave immediately.” I cannot stand whiny players who’re bad sports. If you can’t be bothered to at least try to make the best of bad die rolls then you have no place at the table. The dice will frequently go against you. If your imagination is so limited that “screw it, jump off a bridge” is the only thing you can think off, then these kinds of games are just not for you.