• NOW LIVE! Into the Woods--new character species, eerie monsters, and haunting villains to populate the woodlands of your D&D games.

DM seeking advice

It's not malicious.... but the player is making decisions that are a bit reckless. Not recognizing when it's time to bail and let the tanks do tanky things. Not understanding the powers and limits of stealth. Also not recognizing subtle role-playing stuff, like an NPC asking for discretion - and then the rogue asking the NPC for papers or documents to connect the party to the NPC.
I always figure that one of the important aspects of older editions is the relative ease of rolling up new characters. Consequences are part of the game. Sometimes being recklessness gets you the gem eyes of the statute - sometimes it animates and pulps the party... Both results are the game working as intended.

That said...

One doesn't want to be the "killer DM". I find a lot of the time when players say they're about to do something obviously very dangerous that checking in with them and reiterating the obvious danger is a good referee tactic. A lot of the time the player may have missed some bit of description or context that should be obvious.

For physical dangers I even go so far as telling the players the mechanics I will likely use. e.g. "You want to jump onto the bar of the mummified chariot king's chariot as it charges you? Okay that is very hard, and you aren't an acrobat - If you make a 6d6 roll under Dex you'll succeed, if not you'll fall under the hooves and wheels and be stunned for 2 rounds while taking 5D6 damage with a Save vs. Paralysis for 1/2 damage." Generally I find players are okay with terrible consequences if they're making the decision to take the risk. I figure most characters can judge risks like that. Likewise NPC stuff. Like the player might not know that "The Knights of Not Putting Up With Your naughty word" train their entire lives to murder people who give them guff, but the character likely will and even if not that knight's expression and hand hovering over the hilt of their sword "PC Killer" should.
 

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One doesn't want to be the "killer DM".
IME there are no "killer DMs" - just "meat-grinder" adventures/campaigns.

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