Thanks for all the suggestions!
@
(Psi)SeveredHead for asking about the surroundings and looking for the coolest move
@
steenan for thinking about whether some powers focus a lot more on the system than the story
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Dragonblade for suggesting to think about how each power should play out for the character
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TheFindus for focussing on what the character would do in the situation
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Dungeoneer for avoiding analysis paralis by trying to simplify some things in the build
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Balesir for thinking about what I want to achieve and then grabbing a power that helps that, instead of the other way around
Next game is tonight.
One of the other players suggested printing out the various spells and powers (index card size) instead of literally having them on a big list. I'm hoping that having them sorted into thematic piles will make it easier to follow the suggestion to think about what I want to do, and then grabbing the action that enables it. (Seems obvious thinking about the power cards in 4e, but something I'd never used in the editions I've played more).
Since a bunch of the domain powers are buffy/quick actions, I think I'll also try to move back into my old-fashioned comfort zone a bit by subbing out one or two of the buffy/quick action spells for some with more direct effects (damage and healing). I can then change the mix when I'm feeling it more.
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Most importantly, 13th Age makes it clear this is not a simulator of any sort, and because it doesn't carry the D&D Brand nobody seems emotionally invested in trying to force the issue.
That seems like a good explanation of why no hub-bub to me.
The bottom line is you're unlikely to see a lot of hand wringing over 13th Age's unapologetic embrace of non-simulationist mechanics because the folks who get upset over those things probably wouldn't be playing 13th Age in the first place.
I think I was conflating all the positiveness over 13thA's release here on the boards and the fact it was d20, with a level of popularity that would have caused it to overlap with the pro-3/3.5/PF crowd. Silly of me in retrospect, since that ignores all the other ways that d20 has been used that pull away from its origins into the wider world of gaming, and that of course the number of posts relative to other things was huge right at the release.
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I can't help you with immersion. This is something I have never experienced with RPGs. I am well aware I am playing a game when I have played any RPG.
As @
dd.stevenson says I don't plan on forgetting that I'm playing a game.
Is "get into character" a better word choice? (Is there a good web-page that describes the subtleties in their definitions?)
I was trying to get at the difficulty I was having trying to view things from the point of view the character would have instead of just choosing things from a list based on their mechanical effectiveness. Or as @
pemerton says, getting some emotion out of it that corresponds to how the PC would be feeling. If it's all just plusses and minuses and moving little squares through a grid, then why bother giving the parts of the game names like elf, dwarf, or spell or call it role-playing?
Its possible I miss understand them but I really don't care enough about it question them further.
But don't let me get in the way of your dismissive non-caring