dumbest game questions you never heard

[X-ray Crossbow]

From my last session of D&D:
"The Gnolls are looting the Yeth Hounds carcass. Barak (male dwarf fighter PC) and Sheva (NPC human female Cleric) are going into the cave. What do you do Jakob and Nary (male human wizard and male human bard PCs)?"

Nary: I pull off one of it's feathers.

DM: "Feathers? From where?"

Nary: It's wings.

DM: What wings?

(Darn my vague descriptions!)

 

[Stone Angel]

This was from a 2e game, and in highschool once every four or five months we had a D&D fest, where we invited almost everyone to come. This time was a low turnout and these two kids had never played before. I gave one a cleric and one a mace.

Me: Your party stumbles upon a group of slobbering, walking corpses with bloodlust in there eyes. They attack, initiative.

Newbie#1: I detect evil.

Me: OK

Newbie#2: I want to spray it with my mace.

Me: You two come here we need to talk about some things.

 

[Mark]

What do I get if I am Half-Elf and Half-Orc..?

 

[KDLadage]

What do I get if I am Half-Elf and Half-Orc..?

One of my favorite old campaigns, actually...

 

[Dagger75]

Since I am already cursed

Stupid question I heard once at my D&D game


Can I play a GNOME??



Oh I am so burning in gnome hell.

 

[jdavis]

Re: Since I am already cursed

Stupid question I heard once at my D&D game


Can I play a GNOME??



Oh I am so burning in gnome hell.

So what if somebody wanted to play something different, like say a half gnome/half dragon? this is the stupid questions you never hear, I wonder if anybody has ever heard that one. Gnome Hell is probably full of Half Gnomes.

 

[Mark]

Re: Re: Since I am already cursed

Gnome Hell is probably full of Half Gnomes.

Half-Gnome/Half-Fiends maybe...

 

[Psionicist]

PC: "I uppercut the darn wizard before he can cast any spells".
DM: "Do you have any unarmed combat feats, or do you have any levels of monk?".
PC: "No".
DM: "Then you can't".

 

[WattsHumphrey]

Sadly, I got this one:

BBEG: Don't move or I'll kill the girl!
Player (Raising hands and casting Fireball): I'm sorry, girl, we'll bring you back!

The BBEG's jaw hit the ground as quickly as mine did.

 

[Skade]

Heh, you joke, but something very similar happened to one of my players. She was leaving work, and one of her co-workers asked where she was headed.

"I'm got my role-playing game tonight," she said. He looked confused.

"Is that the thing you do with masks and handcuffs?"

She was very amused.

My old group got this a lot. The same people also thought D&D stood for Dungeons and Domination, and for some reason they always thought I was the sub. I'm the Dungeon MASTER people, my ego would never let me sub. It did not help that many of us wore black latex on a daily basis, but still...