Odhanan said:
A DM who doesn't want everyone - and I mean everyone - to really enjoy the time they spend at the game table isn't a good DM.
Maybe it's just that I know my limitations, and maybe it's just that I have played with so many people in so many different areas, but I have to say that IME the best way to ensure that everyone who plays at my table really
enjoys the experience is to be somewhat selective with just who that "everyone" is.
Sure, I'll give just about anyone a chance to play. However, if the person's expectations are radically different from my own, or if the person's enjoyment of the game is derived from actions that detract from the enjoyment of others, then that person will not be invited back. That seems pretty simple to me. In all honesty, I think it is mandatory, whether I am the DM or not. If my expectations as a player diverge widely from that of the group (i.e., the DM cannot give me what I'm after, unless he changes the game so that it is no longer fun for him and/or others) and I am for some reason unable to realize this on my own, I
expect the DM to tell me it isn't working out. Life is too short to waste time on games you aren't
really enjoying, and I wouldn't be offended by someone removing me from a game if I was preventing real enjoyment.
Now, as previously stated, my DMing style can accomodate quite a few different player styles. Which is lucky for me, because that means that I have a really large player pool to choose from. Does this mean that everyone will like everything about every game session? Well, obviously not. I have bad nights, like everyone else. I have played with groups that contain players more interested in talking to the creatures than fighting them, and also contain players more interested in fighting. Obviously, not everyone is getting everything they want all the time.
What everyone does get, though, is the
potential to get what they want. Assuming, of course, that they are at all compatable with my DMing style.
If a player comes up with a character background that fits the world, I use it to heighten their experience of the game. If a player is looking for a dungeon crawl, interesting locations to explore are not hard to find. If a player is looking for political intrigue, there is plenty of that to go around. As a DM, I set up situations -- a
lot of ongoing situations of different types -- and the players decide what to follow up on.
However, if Joe wants to do dungeon crawls, and Bob wants to do politics, it is incumbant upon Joe and Bob to strike a compromise. I don't tell them where to go. I don't simply "think about a campaign {I} want to run" -- I think about a
campaign setting I want to run, develop that setting, and then set the players loose in it to follow the hooks they are interested in and build the campaign they want. This is, IMHO, a lot more satisfying than a 1-20 adventure path. YMMV.
My primary concerns as DM are
(1) that the players have a lot of different hooks of different types, so that they may find things that they are interested,
(2) that the players are challenged, with the potential of real loss and real gains, and
(3) that the players walk away from the table with some experience of a world that is different than the one they live their day-to-day lives in. In this last case, I like to throw in the potential for philosophical or (fantasy) religious debate, as well as bits and pieces that demonstrate how different our modern worldview is from earlier worldviews.
IME, these things make the game better for the players as well as for me.
However, if all you want to do is spend time with friends, roll dice, and eat pizza, and that is
consitently or
nearly consistently your reason for playing, then either you should have someone else DM or we should be playing a different game. Monopoly is just as good for those sorts of nights, and I am happy to join you in a game of Sorry.
While, beyond a shadow of a doubt, some players will come to my game table eventually and find something they dislike, it is not necessarily my job to rectify it. It depends upon what they don't like, why they don't like it, and why it is there. I mean, really, if you had a player come up to you and say "I don't like rolling 1d20 for attacks anymore; let's roll 2d10 instead!" would you necessarily change? Would changing result in everyone ending up pleased? In my world, elves are different than those in the PHB. If a player wants to play a PHB elf, should the world change to accomodate that player? Why is this any different than the 1d20/2d10 example?
If by then they tell it to you fair and square, and you answer "you agreed to the playstyle/campaign theme/whatever before playing, so too bad, man!", then I think you're not trying hard enough to make everyone have fun around the table, or in other words, you are too rigid with your own rules while we are speaking of real, breathing, inconsistant sometimes, complex most of the time, human beings.
How about, "I'm sorry, but there are no PHB elves in this world"?
Or do you imagine that, simply because I am DMing a game, that I have the players chained to their seats, unable to get up, unable to find a new game, unable to run a game themselves if they want something different?
For Cthulu's sake, man, the players are people. They are quite capable of taking responsibility for their own needs and desires. I run a game because I want to. Period. I run the game I want to run. Period. I don't have to run it; no one has to play in it. If it works out so that everyone is happy with the running and the playing, then that is great. If you think you'd be happier running your own game, or if you think you'd be happier playing with someone else running a game, both are perfectly fine. I don't break friendships because you'd like more plane-hopping and Joe's running Sigil.
I'd say, if your players are children -- or you are used to thinking of them as such -- then your point may be valid. I like to believe that my players are able to act like adults.
RC