My group ended up going with Con/Int for Tieflings, although we haven't figured out how to make the racial power into something we like yet.
I could totally see different stats for Male and Female Drow, but, on the other hand, I can also see that Dark Pact Warlock makes a lot more sense than the cleric class for Drow adventurers.
There was talk - in the DMG? -, however, of letting evil clerics use some other power source than radiant, which would do a lot to address the disconnect there.
I like dwarves as they are. The dwarf shaman really appeals to me - Stonespeakers for the win! - and they make really excellent fighters in terms of qualifying for completely bitchin feats.