Gencon Couples, Help me!

[Shadowdancer]

If she enjoys playing games, I don't really see the problem. She can find plenty of games to play during the times you two aren't doing something together. I suggest picking one thing to do together each day, and then pick some things to do seperately.

I went to my first GenCon last summer with my wife, who does not game and thinks its all pretty silly, esp. the idea of a big convention for people to get together to play games. But I knew there was no way she would let me go to Indy without her. So I went on the Internet and found some things she is interested in that had nothing to do with GenCon.

My wife's a big sports fan, esp. baseball. There is a minor league baseball team in Indy, and the stadium is right across the street from the convention center. The team was in town for games on Thursday and Friday. She went to both games. There also is the NCAA Sports museum or hall of champions or something like that in Indy. So she went there on Sat., and visited some other museums and historical monuments, etc. We met for dinner before I had to go back for a 7 p.m. session, then went to a movie at the mall.

I think if you two just sit down together and talk about it, you can find a way to make it work, and make it a fun trip to take together.

 

[diaglo]

i know numerous gamer couples.

it helps if you share an interest in the hobby. but isn't necessary. there will be plenty to do.

just visiting any new city can be fun.

show her the sights, sounds, experience of traveling together to a new place.

not to mention getting to rub elbows with gamers of lesser and greater geekitude than yourself... you can show her all ranges of gamers...

 

[der_kluge]

Although I believe they are fighting a losing battle, I thought it would be funny to point out that, according to the website, the "proper" way to write "Gen Con" is as two words. heh.


Anyway, my time at Gen Con is far too important to me to spend it doing something frivilous like having sex. I'm there to game, damnit!

 

[diaglo]

Anyway, my time at Gen Con is far too important to me to spend it doing something frivilous like having sex. I'm there to game, damnit!

do both.

i have a set of dice on a string, mang

diaglo"pulls out the string" Ooi

 

[CarlZog]

It's also the fact that I know how much you enjoy it, and I know you will hardly realize I'm there until it's time to curl up and go to sleep.

As much as I know you would like me to go, I think it will be better for you to go without me, Art. You'll enjoy it so much more then I will, and your not gonna want to deal with me if I'm not enjoying myself.

This is exactly why my wife doesn't go, and I strongly agree. Caryn may find stuff to do on her own, but I guarantee she's not going to be as raptured with the event as you, Art.

And as for other stuff to do: You guys live in NYC; this is Indianapolis, Indiana. There's just not much there by comparison (no offense to the locals).

And when she does get bored, she'll rightly want to find you and do some non-game stuff together. Are you ready to surrender half-a-day of GenCon to take in the sightseeing tour of Indy? Honestly, I think you'll both end up unhappy.

The week of Gencon is 2 weeks before Caryn (Ruaalien2) leaves for her new college in Rhode Island. ... After she leaves, due to financial and time constraints, as well as other responsiblities (working to pay rent), It will be weeks/months between our visits together.

Well, one way to save money would be for her to NOT spend a wad of cash going to Indianapolis!

By the way, I think you overestimate the difficulty of getting between NY and RI. I live in Providence and my father-in-law lives in Manhattan; I've been making this trip for years. It's a three-hour drive, or $60 round-trip on the bus. With the high number of other colleges in RI, it also shouldn't be too hard to find shared weekend rides to NY and back. (Lots of kids are heading back and forth on the weekends.) Amtrak is a lot nicer option, but it's about $150 round-trip these days.

One last note: Long-distance relationships stink, especially when you're young and the love is new. My wife and I were together for eight years before we finally got around to getting married. For a couple years of that time, we were both working on different sailing ships -- thousands of miles apart and often unable to communicate at all for weeks at a time. We survived. If your love is remotely real, and you put even a slight amount of effort into the relationship, you'll survive 200 miles connected by interstate highway.

Carl

 

[BOZ]

my wife doesn't like gencon as much as i do or in the same way, but she likes to be there with me nonetheless. i never had to coerce her to come with me - in fact i'd have to convince her not to. though having her by my side might mean i don't get to do everything i would otherwise want to do, i have a lot of fun with her there all the same.

 

[der_kluge]

"What happens at Gen Con - stays at Gen Con."


My wife has commented that she'd like to go, but maybe just for a day, just to see the circus. I told her she could open up a little therapy booth (ala Lucy Van Pelt) and make a fortune giving therapy to all the depressed gamers there.

 

[Dextolen]

My first thought was 'give her an easy out', have her attend for one day - but you kids are from New York, so that's a big investment in time and $ just to get to Indy.

She sounds cool with you going, it's only 4 days away from her. You'll both live!

 

[The_Universe]

If she likes games, and you're conscientious about how you spend your time (you shouldn't be ignoring her, even when you're at Gen Con) I'm sure she'll have a wonderful time - there's a lot of great stuff for couples to do, and what could be more romantic than a few hours spent in the True Dungeon or something?

My wife and I are in a slightly different situation, in that neither of us had ever been to Gen Con until we went together. So, it's "our" thing, rather than mine or hers.

 

[nakia]

I understand you wanting to bring your girlfriend to GenCon. I want to bring my wife some day, just to show her the spectacle and so she can participate a little in a hobby of mine. You want to spend as much time with her as possible before she moves away. You want her to particiapte in something that's important to you. You want to go and have fun.

Here are your options:
1. You go and she stays. It seems like she is cool with this option. You get to go, throw yourself into the con, miss her a little, and miss out on a couple of precious days you would normally get to spend together before she takes off to school. Go with this option if you will seriously be bent out of shape if you don't make it to Gen Con. No one, especially your girlfriend, wants you to be bummed out for weeks because you missed it.

2. Don't go. You get to spend extra time with her, which is very cool. Is that more important than you going? Will you be bummed out and/or resentful if you don't go? Only go with this option if you can commit yourself to NOT going and be happy with that. (This was my situation last year, due to some family choices that had to be made. I was a little bummed, but committed myself to my choice and made the best of it. No resentment. No anger.)

3. Both go. You get to spend more time together. She gets to particiapte more in the hobby. Realize, though, that your Gen Con experience will be different if your girlfriend is there. If you both go, it should be a trip for the both of you. It would by wrong, IMHO, if she went and then you just did what you wanted the whole four days. Will it be okay if you skip some gamng events to go to a baseball game, or out to a nice dinner, or see some of Indianapolis (which is a nice city, I think)? Is she at all interested in any of these things? If you can make Gen Con a trip for both of you, then this sounds like a good option. You get some Gen Con and some couple time -- a nice compromise.

And I second CarlZog's post about long distance relationships. My wife and I were apart for a year and a half before we were married -- our entire engagment period. You have to have love, commitment, and some credit cards, but it worked out for us.