D&D 5E GMs of EN World: What player behavior annoys you the most?

[Waterbizkit]

I bet you've never DM'ed a session in your life. You realize how much work we put into running a game, and then you can't even be bothered to take notes, or take an interest?

Lazy players are the worst.

It's not your players responsibility to be invested in your world as much as you are. Expecting them to be is probably one of worst mistakes a DM can make.

Crafting detailed worlds and letting our imaginations run amok is one of the greatest parts of being a DM. You get to breathe life into your creation, where every location has a reason to be there and every NPC has their own deep personality and daily routines. There's even a long and storied history to be revealed as the secrets of ages past are laid bare. The world lives!

For the love of god don't expect your players to give a censored. It's great when they do, but don't expect it and don't treat them as lazy, disrespectful people because they're just not that interested. Of course you're interested. Of course you care. You made it. Don't expect others to share that passion just because.

And even on a smaller scale, with regards to the effort required to run a session, never mind craft a world, I look at it the same way to be honest. Yes it can be a lot of work, but it's work you chose to do. At the end of the day this is a game and expecting people to take it as seriously as you might is unrealistic.

However, at the end of the day what all this points to is that each of us needs to find the group we fit best with. We all play the game in our way and finding those who view it the same way is key to the enjoyment of everyone. I fit with my players like a glove. Reading this thread, some of you would lock the doors with my players inside and light the house on fire.

Anyway, I had more to say on the OPs subject since my last response was (mostly) tongue in cheek, but alas... work demands my attention.

 

[Oofta]

I bet you've never DM'ed a session in your life. You realize how much work we put into running a game, and then you can't even be bothered to take notes, or take an interest?

Lazy players are the worst.

Right. I haven't been DMing since the 70s. I don't DM far more than I play.

I like to pay attention to and participate in the game. If I'm constantly taking notes, I'm not doing that. Taking notes, trying to remember how to spell Grazzet (Graze-it? Grazz't?) takes me out of the game and out of the moment. I'd rather give my attention and focus to the DM and the other players building a scene, thinking about how my character would react, what they know (instead of player knowledge) and so on.

The best games are like a good book to me. I get lost in them, caught up in the moment, start visualizing what's happening.

It's called getting into character. Roleplaying, not note taking. If that makes me lazy, so be it.

 

[jasper]

I got to agree with the OP, cellphone use annoys me to no end. But I also agree with Iserith. It is really important for the players to get along, and to make some effort to cooperate.

pttttt. Why! Morrus would not let me copy his homework Tuesday. Flexor the Mighty told Debbie I had a Crush on her on Thursday!. I backstab Morris Cleric!

 

[DRF]

Someone hasn't been paying attention. Before you make accusations like that you should really check their posting history and see if you are correct. Guess you couldn't be bothered to put in the effort, or take an interest before going off half cocked.

Lazy posters are the worst.

Lol, posting history. Is this one of those types of forums where a high post count equals more respect and reverence? Before you answer, check my posting history.

 

[robus]

Lol, posting history. Is this one of those types of forums where a high post count equals more respect and reverence? Before you answer, check my posting history.

No, but this is a forum that is generally a pleasant place to be (though we do have our squabbles ) - but new posters who throw their weight around calling out longtime members are not doing their reputation any favors.

 

[jasper]

I bet you've never DM'ed a session in your life. You realize how much work we put into running a game, and then you can't even be bothered to take notes, or take an interest?

Lazy players are the worst.

YES YES YES LAZY PLAYERS ARE THE WORST!
WE SLAVE IN OUR BASEMENTS TO CREATE GREAT WORLDS!
LAZY PLAYERS DON'T CARE!
(note state farm, allstate, and other insurance companies do not cover house collapse when you hand dig your own basement without a permit. ps water tables. look them up).
WE DMS CARVE OUR OWN DICE OUT OF THE PITTSBURGH PLASTIC MINES.
SUFFERING LUNG DAMAGE AND EYE IRRATION.
LAZY PLAYERS DON'T CARE.
(note OSHA is mute on the effects of plastic mining in the NorthEastern seaboard)
WE LOVELY MAKE PLAYER HANDOUT OUT OF SHEEP PARAMENT.
WE MAKE OUR OWN INK FOR HANDOUTS.
LAZY PLAYERS DON'T CARE.
(note sheep ranchers have shot guns. Rock salt hurts. And grandmas hate reseasoning their cast iron skillets. Wooden spoons do a d6 damage I tell you.)
WE SELL OUR SOULS FOR GREAT CAMPAIGNS!
LAZY PLAYERS DON'T CARE.
(note demigorgon does not take recycled, or previously sold souls. PS he hates Stranger Things).
LAZY PLAYERS DON'T CARE!

 

[iserith]

Here's the thing with players remembering things in your game:

Maybe your game isn't very memorable.

I mean, of course you remember it. You created it. You know all the plots and NPCs and lands and mysteries. And perhaps you have an expectation that the players will be all into discovering the amazing things with the weird names you've created and committing them to memory or at least take notes during the game. But maybe I'm just a jaded old DM but that expectation does not seem in line with reality.

What you can do to help is don't make your game so complex that it's hard to remember who's who and what's what week to week. Stick to archetypal stories. There's a reason those stories have existed for thousands of years. Keep the quests to a manageable number. Give your NPCs memorable names, even if they're a a bit silly. (Or do what I do and make them purposefully silly so nobody forgets them.) Do a quick recap at the start of the session like TV shows do.

Do that sort of thing and then reset your expectations and you won't find yourself disappointed in the players because you'll have adjusted the things you can control and stopped worrying about the stuff you can't.

 

[CrimsonCarcharodon]

Mine is cellphone use at the table. Unless someone has a good reason to have their phone at the table during a game, like if they're waiting for an important text from a family member in the hospital or something, I generally ask all my players to leave their phones in my kitchen away from my game room, or at the very least to put them on silent. It's where I leave my phone during games.

 

[Dausuul]

It's not your players responsibility to be invested in your world as much as you are. Expecting them to be is probably one of worst mistakes a DM can make.

Crafting detailed worlds and letting our imaginations run amok is one of the greatest parts of being a DM. You get to breathe life into your creation, where every location has a reason to be there and every NPC has their own deep personality and daily routines. There's even a long and storied history to be revealed as the secrets of ages past are laid bare. The world lives!

For the love of god don't expect your players to give a censored. It's great when they do, but don't expect it and don't treat them as lazy, disrespectful people because they're just not that interested. Of course you're interested. Of course you care. You made it. Don't expect others to share that passion just because.

Yeah, this I agree with. Worldbuilding is something I do for myself. If I can get the players to care, that's a win for me, but it's my job to make it interesting to them, not theirs to be interested. As for keeping track of the plot, sometimes I have trouble with that, so how can I expect them to remember all the plot threads I kicked off? I encourage note-taking, but I'll happily supply details that have slipped people's memory, or remind them to look in the world documents I've provided.

What I do want them to do is learn how to play their own damn characters that they themselves built. That much really is on them. If you can't be bothered to learn to play a caster, don't build a freakin' caster. I have a world, a plot, a bunch of monsters, and a zillion NPCs to manage. I have neither the time nor the desire to play your PC for you.

 

[MechaPilot]

I was going to try to list my biggest peeve, but (apparently) I have a few of them.

1) Players who aren't going to show up to the session, for whatever reason (whether the reason is good or not), and who don't have the courtesy to notify the group about it until we call them 15-30 minutes after the game was supposed to have started.

2) Players who insist on telling other players how to play their characters. I don't mind a player making a suggestion or giving a warning to another player (e.g. "Maybe wait on the Fireball until the rest of us are out of the blast radius." or "Let's take out their caster first, because those AoE spells are really screwing us over."), but outright telling another player what they should be doing bothers me. In particular, the phrase "no, no, what you should do is _____" really gets my Irish up.

3) Players who show up too drunk or high to play. I'm not exactly a party girl, but I don't begrudge people their chemical recreation (as long as you're not hurting anyone else, do what makes you happy). However, if you're going to play at my table, you need to show up sober enough to actually play. And maybe brush your teeth and have a few mints to kill the booze smell (or change your clothes so you don't completely stink like skunky weed).

4) Players who consistently forget their stuff. Yes, I can loan you a pencil, paper, and some dice for the session; none of those are a big deal, but they can get annoying if it's done with any real frequency. But, you need to show up with your character sheet at the very least. I put in a fair amount of effort reading the adventures beforehand, modifying them to fit with my setting, bookmarking pages, etc., and I bring everything I need to run the session. It's not my job to bring your character sheet too. If you want, I'm willing to keep a copy of your character in with my stuff, but it's on you to make that copy and to make sure my copy is up to date with your main character sheet. If you forget to put your new treasure on it, or advance it when you level up, that's too bad. Fix it on your own time.

5) Players who make characters incapable of working with others. Look, I don't mind a little interpersonal strife between characters; it can be a good thing that makes the characters feel more like real people. But, for the love of god, you gotta be able to work together without throwing each other under the bus.

6) Players who turn everything into a joke. I like humor at the table (D&D is a game, and it's about having fun) but, you need some moderation to keep the whole thing from just becoming one big joke that I didn't need to actually prepare and bring books for. And if your jokes are going to be a bit lewd or risque, go the extra mile: don't aim for the low-hanging fruit, how about a clever double entendre instead of a tired old "that's what (s)he said" joke.