I've "met" the perfect woman (for me).
- Thread starter BrooklynKnight
- Start date
Hida Bukkorosu
First Post
RangerWickett said:
you think you got it bad, for me its the past 26 years. and i'm 26.
Angcuru
First Post
Well, in my circle of friends (from HS, not the gaming circle), I have the strange position of being the go-to man when relationship problems arise, despite having always been single. :\ And so, I've developed a good deal of insight on the matter.
A few bits of advice to men and women alike.
Guys: when the woman speaks, listen up; think before you speak; don't try to be manly or macho; be sensitive, it's not that hard; surprise her with a gift every now and then, and don't be stingy on the compliments; let the woman win the argument.
Women: don't think that expecting a guy to be caring and sensitive is too much, 'cause it isn't; men are more than capable of doing stupid things, so don't go crazy if we forget something minor/non-major; TELL HIM when something is wrong, don't make him guess.
Both: don't expect your partner to always be the way s/he is, people change; if you've got something important or heavy to say, say it gradually, not all at once: a few hits with a hammer are less shocking than a heavy whack with a sledge.
A few bits of advice to men and women alike.
Guys: when the woman speaks, listen up; think before you speak; don't try to be manly or macho; be sensitive, it's not that hard; surprise her with a gift every now and then, and don't be stingy on the compliments; let the woman win the argument.
Women: don't think that expecting a guy to be caring and sensitive is too much, 'cause it isn't; men are more than capable of doing stupid things, so don't go crazy if we forget something minor/non-major; TELL HIM when something is wrong, don't make him guess.
Both: don't expect your partner to always be the way s/he is, people change; if you've got something important or heavy to say, say it gradually, not all at once: a few hits with a hammer are less shocking than a heavy whack with a sledge.
Angcuru said:
I'll disagree with this one tidbit. Ditch the idea of wining and losing an argument altogether.
If it is about something important, the darned thing needs to be settled, and settled honestly. Allowing someone to win leaves the disagreement to fester. It'll come back and bite you on the butt.
If it isn't about something important, you shouldn't have been arguing in the first place!
Djeta Thernadier
First Post
This is so turning into the EnWorld Guide to Dating...
Here's a few things I'd like to say...
Guys -
Don't spit. It's just icky. Do it in private if you must.
Do not EVER honk at women from your car. That disgusts those of us who have at least some level of class and we think you are sleazy. Don't.
Do not get pissy when we want to listen to OUR music in the car now and then.
Do not argue when we want to drive, or critique us the whole way through.
Do not obsess over old girlfriends. Unless you have a child or some other reason to be a part of each other's lives, let the past go or we will get fed up with waiting for you to get over her, and we'll leave if it comes to that , BUT find a middle ground .....don't constantly berate old girlfriends either. This makes you come off as bitter and hard to deal with. Unless she killed your dog or something, don't refer to her as a ____.
(I've experienced both of these, several times. They're equally bad.)
Call your mom. Unless she is deceased or disowned you or something. Calling your mom regularly shows us you care about family and generally respect women. Don't know why, but it does.
Don't whine about the bad things in your life. If you have problems, fix them. Male drama queens are worse than female ones.
Do not suddenly start listening to the Clash alot and start speaking with a British accent and then dump your girl because she is not "punk enough" for your new image. (okay...this has probably never happened to anyone else, but I had to throw it in there)
Do not put a big ridiculous spoiler on your car. Unless it came with the car, and is reasonably small, we find them to be idiotic. You're driving a car; not a small aircraft. Get over it.
Stuffed animals are your friends. Cute animals are your friends. Babies are your friends. Even those of us who never want children (ie. me) think babies are cute. Don't refer to them as smelly screaming brats, unless the child in question actually is.
We get moody. Accept it and don't take it personally. But if we do something that truly annoys you - tell us. We are not mind readers any more than you are. If we've annoyed you or made you mad, inform us of this, so we can fix it. We're not as unreasonable as stereotypes make us out to be.
No real life woman will ever look like the girls in Playboy. This is because , off camera, THEY don't even look like the girls in Playboy. There are things called effects. Airbrushing and such. They aren't real.
Have Playboy or pron or whatever. We like that stuff too you know. But please do not plaster your bedroom/garage/gameroom with posters of half naked chicks. That is just tacky.
Don't be jealous or clingy. But act like you care. If we're going out with our best guy friend from college who is happily married with children - HE IS NOT A THREAT. If we want time alone to write, watch girl flicks, or shop - we are not trying to blow you off....
Women , contrary to popular belief, enjoy sex. If you're bored with your gf or whoever, tell her, so she can move on. Don't string her along after you're sick of being with her because she's not shiny and new anymore.
NOW - from my experiences in life...
GIRLS -
Guys like a lot of alone time. Don't hound them for attention every 5 minutes.
Guys like guy things. You may or may not be interested in it. Get over it and accept it. Surely you have plenty of things in common to do / talk about together. If he wants to spend a day a week watching NASCAR or something, find a hobby or something to keep you occupied.
Guys ogle at skanky looking women. Sometimes they think they are attractive. Sometimes they think they look ridiculous. But it's a fact. Guys look at women (or men, depending on what kind of guys we're talking about here. Often ALL people check out ALL other people. It's called peoplewatching. I look at guys/girls/small children/animals everyone and everything. You probably do too. Don't start a fight over your bf glancing at some woman for 3 seconds on the street. Let it go.
Orlando Bloom is not real. (see my male comment about Playboy girls). Off camera he's not Legolas/ Will/ Paris.
Don't lay on guilt treatments. It's annoying to guys and nothing good will come of it.
If something is wrong, say so.
Guys don't care what you wear, what color lipstick you have on etc. Don't constantly bug them for fashion advice.
Do not be clingy. And do not freak out if he wants time alone once in a while.
Don't gossip. Please don't.
Don't whine about your weight, your problems etc. Unless you want advice. Guys are tactical by nature. If you want to fix the problem, fine, tell them. But if you just want sympathy - talk to your mom or your best girl friend.
We don't always want to win arguements. Sometimes we really want to hear and discuss an issue.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
That's just a few things I've learned in my 27 years on this planet. I've found it to be very true in most cases.
Here's a few things I'd like to say...
Guys -
Don't spit. It's just icky. Do it in private if you must.
Do not EVER honk at women from your car. That disgusts those of us who have at least some level of class and we think you are sleazy. Don't.
Do not get pissy when we want to listen to OUR music in the car now and then.
Do not argue when we want to drive, or critique us the whole way through.
Do not obsess over old girlfriends. Unless you have a child or some other reason to be a part of each other's lives, let the past go or we will get fed up with waiting for you to get over her, and we'll leave if it comes to that , BUT find a middle ground .....don't constantly berate old girlfriends either. This makes you come off as bitter and hard to deal with. Unless she killed your dog or something, don't refer to her as a ____.
(I've experienced both of these, several times. They're equally bad.)
Call your mom. Unless she is deceased or disowned you or something. Calling your mom regularly shows us you care about family and generally respect women. Don't know why, but it does.
Don't whine about the bad things in your life. If you have problems, fix them. Male drama queens are worse than female ones.
Do not suddenly start listening to the Clash alot and start speaking with a British accent and then dump your girl because she is not "punk enough" for your new image. (okay...this has probably never happened to anyone else, but I had to throw it in there)
Do not put a big ridiculous spoiler on your car. Unless it came with the car, and is reasonably small, we find them to be idiotic. You're driving a car; not a small aircraft. Get over it.
Stuffed animals are your friends. Cute animals are your friends. Babies are your friends. Even those of us who never want children (ie. me) think babies are cute. Don't refer to them as smelly screaming brats, unless the child in question actually is.
We get moody. Accept it and don't take it personally. But if we do something that truly annoys you - tell us. We are not mind readers any more than you are. If we've annoyed you or made you mad, inform us of this, so we can fix it. We're not as unreasonable as stereotypes make us out to be.
No real life woman will ever look like the girls in Playboy. This is because , off camera, THEY don't even look like the girls in Playboy. There are things called effects. Airbrushing and such. They aren't real.
Have Playboy or pron or whatever. We like that stuff too you know. But please do not plaster your bedroom/garage/gameroom with posters of half naked chicks. That is just tacky.
Don't be jealous or clingy. But act like you care. If we're going out with our best guy friend from college who is happily married with children - HE IS NOT A THREAT. If we want time alone to write, watch girl flicks, or shop - we are not trying to blow you off....
Women , contrary to popular belief, enjoy sex. If you're bored with your gf or whoever, tell her, so she can move on. Don't string her along after you're sick of being with her because she's not shiny and new anymore.
NOW - from my experiences in life...
GIRLS -
Guys like a lot of alone time. Don't hound them for attention every 5 minutes.
Guys like guy things. You may or may not be interested in it. Get over it and accept it. Surely you have plenty of things in common to do / talk about together. If he wants to spend a day a week watching NASCAR or something, find a hobby or something to keep you occupied.
Guys ogle at skanky looking women. Sometimes they think they are attractive. Sometimes they think they look ridiculous. But it's a fact. Guys look at women (or men, depending on what kind of guys we're talking about here. Often ALL people check out ALL other people. It's called peoplewatching. I look at guys/girls/small children/animals everyone and everything. You probably do too. Don't start a fight over your bf glancing at some woman for 3 seconds on the street. Let it go.
Orlando Bloom is not real. (see my male comment about Playboy girls). Off camera he's not Legolas/ Will/ Paris.
Don't lay on guilt treatments. It's annoying to guys and nothing good will come of it.
If something is wrong, say so.
Guys don't care what you wear, what color lipstick you have on etc. Don't constantly bug them for fashion advice.
Do not be clingy. And do not freak out if he wants time alone once in a while.
Don't gossip. Please don't.
Don't whine about your weight, your problems etc. Unless you want advice. Guys are tactical by nature. If you want to fix the problem, fine, tell them. But if you just want sympathy - talk to your mom or your best girl friend.
We don't always want to win arguements. Sometimes we really want to hear and discuss an issue.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
That's just a few things I've learned in my 27 years on this planet. I've found it to be very true in most cases.
BrooklynKnight
First Post
Things are slowly slowing down, getting more serious.
Man i really really like her.
Man i really really like her.
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