Magical swords that no one will make

[Thanee]

A pacifist sword, but actually, that kinda makes sense, depening on what purpose it has been created for.

Bye
Thanee

 

[Staffan]

These ideas came up at tonights game. Not really the most useful of items, but we found them funny.

An intelligent feminist broad sword.

The card game Munchkin has both the broad sword and the gentleman's club, usable by women and men respectively. It also has the Singing and Dancing sword, and the Sneaky Bastard Sword.

 

[RangerWickett]

I just like that in Munchkin, you get cursed with a sex change rather regularly. And you get a penalty for a while because you're 'distracted.' *sigh*

I recall that in 2e's Night Below adventure, there was an intelligent sword that kept mixing up gendered pronouns. It's not like it really had any frame of reference, y'know?

 

[jmucchiello]

- A Ring of Invisibility that won't shut up. Even if you beg it to.

Only starts blabbing when you are alone. As soon as it "sees" your friends again it shuts up. But if it "sees" people you don't know it calls out to them in a pleasing, inviting way. It's actually a ring of socialization. When you are alone (and feeling invisible) it tries to cheer you up. When you are around someone new, it must make use of the opportunity to get you more friends. And, when you are with friends, it knows it can rest until the next time you NEED it. Quite a noble ring, I'd say.

 

[Crothian]

There are some good ideas here

How about mixing of classes? An intelligent sword that used to be a wizard and wants anyone that uses it to study magic under it.

A Paladin that gets put into a sword of subtety so it can convince rogues not to attack in a sneaky, unhonorible way.

A monk weapon that basically has the personality of Cane from Kung Fu.

A torch of endless light that's afraid of the dark.

A Magical cape that believes he once belonged to Superman.

a magical mask that keeps saying " you don't know who I am" in a very sing songy voice

magical helmet of Mind Blank that always asks its wearing "What are thinking?"

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

Love the ideas, Crothian and all.

One of my characters (a Bard/Cleric/Virtuoso/Divine Agent of Sune) had an intelligent harp that insisted that it used to me a very handsome male Elf. He only let beautiful Elven women touch him and got very indignant if someone else did (epsiecially if it was a man).

 

[Sejs]

A Sword of Subtilty that tries ever so hard to do its job, but it's possessed of a really twitching, loud personality. Worse, it likes to think of itself as a helper.

"Okay.. we're sneaking up on this guy.. I'll stab him good for ya, he won't know what hit..er.. right.. being quiet now.. mmm hmm hmmm mm HEY LOOK OUT FOR THAT GUY OVER THERE!"

"You should maybe try using the crow's nose on this lock. WHAT? Whaaat? I'm just offering advice. Sheesh. Okay, fine I'll just play lookout for guards the.. hey look, here comes some now!"

"AAAAAH! What was THAT?!! Kill it kill it kill it!...
... oh. Just a rat. Sorry, false alarm."

 

[apsuman]

A great club that constantly yammers "Swing batter batter swing batter batter, SWING!"

A great sword that decreases one size category (to longsword, then shortsword, then dagger, etc) every time it crits, and reverses the process everytime it gets dropped in combat.

 

[Macbeth]

A sword that loudly apologizes everytime it hits in battle, no matter how much the person deserved to get hit.

 

[Staffan]

Once, a long time ago, there was a setting sourcebook/adventure for the Swedish RPG Drakar och Demoner called Svavelvinter (Sulphur Winter). One of the more unique items in that adventure was a dagger called Demens. Demens was really the mind of a well-learned sage, thousands of years old, who had been trapped in the dagger as a result of a magical accident. However, most of Demens's knowledge was woefully out of date (he had been lying around in a tomb for centuries if not millenia, after all), and it was pretty useless as a weapon too. Each time you hit someone with it, there was a chance that the blade would come loose, which would result in the dagger shouting "My teef! My teef!"