Paragon Badger
First Post
Here are random (and less than serious) thoughts/desc. on every monster in the Monster Manual 2, just because I have nothing better to do right now. (Who needs sleep?)
Monsters
Abeil- My first reaction was “I already have lawful ant people why do I need lawful bee people?” However, after reading the entry I think I actually like these guys better. The soldiers Stormwing attack (6d6 in 40’ burst) just rocks. Plus they have better colors…
Ash Rat – Cool little monster, more amusing if they named it fire shrew…
Asperi – Skywalking cold subtype horses. Can I get one as a mount?
Automaton – Hey, Chainmail monsters! Nice to see lower CR constructs but where are the creation rules?
Avolakia- Lovecraft-type aberration. Their saving grace is their cool, “We maintain undead as moving food stock” routine.
Banshee – Save or die. You either love it or hate it.
Bladeling – Spiky goblin-like humanoids from Acheron. Seems bleh to me.
Blood Ape – Apes that can enlarge themselves to Huge size. The jungles got a bit more dangerous.
Boggle – They like to steal shiny objects. So this is like an ugly Kender?
Bogun – Vegetable constructs! For those that think Homunculi are icky.
Bone Naga – Look the dark naga got a new friend!
Bone Ooze – Gargantuan ooze with tons of bones floating inside it. Finally an ooze that will scare my PCs!
Braxat – A rhino/beetle with psionics?!? Umm… at least it hits hard.
Breathdrinker – It looks like you and steals the breath from your lungs. Cool monster, so-so art.
Bronze Serpent – A big scary bronze snake. Cool moster, cool art.
Catoblepas – I don’t know what the heck this thing is, but death rays from the eyes! Ouch!!!
Celestials – A satyr and a werewolf from Elysium. Useful for some planar ally.
Chain Golem – A personal favorite. It slices, it dices. It is a freaking moving blender!!!!
Chaos Roc – A colossal bird with prismatic spray. Don’t piss it off!
Cloaked Ape – Take a monkey and cross it with a flying squirrel.
Clockwork Horror – Their robots trying to take over the world. I like robots trying to take over the world. I can see an Electrum and the Adamantine Horrors reconstructing Pinky and the Brian
scenes.
Cloud Ray – BIG desert flying manta rays. So cool. If you’ve seen Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust you’ve seen these guys.
Corollax – A bright parrot that can do color spray. The first thing I thought of is a Bird of Paradise from Magic: the Gathering
Corpse Gatherer – An animated graveyard that seeks to gain more bodies. This sucker just has a lot of nasty potential.
Crisom Death – A favorite from 2E. But no mention of the possibility of this being a type of vampire that lost it’s physically body and survived.
Darktentacles – Is this where Evard got his inspiration?
Deathbringer – The undead general. His negative burst could be nasty with undead allies.
Demon – A bunch of chainmail monsters (Abyssal Maw) then some interesting demons. My favorite is the everburing Palrethees, a demon that failed his BATs (Balor Apptitude Test)?
Desmodu – Duna-duna-duna-duna! BATMAN! Sorry failed my Will
save.
Desmodu Bat – Big bats the Desmodu grow.
Devil – Cool wasp devil thingy in here, the rest aren’t shabby either.
Dinosaurs – Alright!!!! Plesiosaur, Allosaur, Ankylosaur, Quetzcoatlus, Seismosaur, and Spinosaur. Lost World here we come!
Dire Animal – Mostly stuff from Masters of the Wild
Gem Dragons – (Images of Amethyst telekinesising PCs, off walls, flash through head) Manical laughter follows. BADD will be happy.
Dread Guard – Also known as Stygian Warrior in Myth 2: Soulblighter
Dune Stalker – Desert Monster, bleh.
Effigy – Cool art. Don’t let this thing control you.
Elemental Weird – Seers rock!
Ehter Scarab – Ethereal vermin. whooppee…
Ethereal Doopleganger – Just like a material doopleganger, only ethereal…
Ethereal Slayer – Now this is an ethereal monster. Amubsh the PCs when they try to be sneaky and ethereal there way out of a problem.
Famine Spirit – Open up and say “Ahhhh!”
Felldrake – Chainmail monsters but cool ones.
Fiendwurm – One day I’m an earthworm but now I’m really big, have a portal to the Abyss in my gut, and REALLY bad heartburn. Unless you have some Bigby-sized Tums don’t bug me.
Fihyr – Look it’s a Feyr!
Firbolg – Another giant with big swords.
Fire Bats – “They propel themselves by expelling heated gases
from tubes within their bodies…” Not quite a flumph but getting there.
Flesh Jelly – A big blob o’ skin. Gross yet effective.
Fomorian – U – G – L –Y You don’t need no alibi, you ugly!
Forest Sloth – They aren’t slow and aren’t docile. Sloth is a misnomer here, think prehistoric sloth.
Frost Salamander – Ice lizards are cool… (pun intended)
Galeb Duhr – Another 2e favorite
Gamboi – Blue monkeys!
Giant – Mountain giants are big.
Glimmerskin – Pop goes the hero! Postive energy overload is
soooo amusing…
Golems – Stained glass, Brass, and Dragonflesh. Don’t let a dragon know you are making a dragonflesh golem.
Gravecrawler – A intelligent slug they turns flesh to stone and sees dead people. Interesting potential.
Gravog – a really big and hungry lemur?
Greevise – It’s a Venus flytrap gone bad.
Grell – They’re back…
Grimalkin – A shapeshifting cat with 8 Int. Do they still like catnip?
Grizzly Mastodon – More prehistoric fun.
Half-fiend, Durzagon – What happens when a duergar gets a succubus drunk.
Hellfire Wyrm – I’m thinking Shivan Dragon here. It’s from the
Nine Hells and would make a great campaign villain.
Hook Horror – Cool monster, so-so art.
Immoth - An ice giant, literally.
Ixitxachiti – How do you pronounce that?
Jahi – Possesion undead style!
Jermlaine – Awww, look at the wittle little evil thingys… (My fiance’s reaction)
Juggernaut – Now I know this is from Magic: the Gathering!
Julamus – More blue monkeys!!!!!!!
Kopru – Weird underwater monsters.
Leechwalker – Ugh, a ball of leeches in humanoid from.
Legendary Animals – More stuff from Masters of the Wild.
Leviathan – The whale that ate Pittsburgh…
Linnorms – A personal favorite fairy tale monster. These are large and in charge.
Loxo – An elephant-man. The desc. doesn’t match the art exactly.
Marrash – Looks like a Gnoll with wings.
Meenlock – Shudder- These used to be humans? Ouch.
Megalodon – Even more prehistoric fun.
Megapede – My fiancé hates these things.
Moonbeast – Lovecraft-type monster
Mooncalf – I think this is from a WotC adventure.
Moonrat – Rats that are intelligent during the full moon. The art for this speaks volumes.
Morkoth – An underwater aberration. Who’s arm is sticking out of it’s mouth?
Mudmaw – A croc with a weird mouth…
Myconid – Alright!!! Mushroom people!!!
Needlefolk – A plant person. Don’t squeeze the needlefolk.
Neogi – Spelljammer favorites.
Nethersight Mastiff – Because the shadow mastiffs weren’t enough.
Nightmare Beast – The name says it all.
Nimblewight- rapier-wielding constructs that hide among the living. Potential here.
Ocean Strider – A killer whale giant. Cool art.
Orcwort – Possibly my favorite monster from the book. It’s a tree that can move and make orc shaped “fruit” that goes out to grab some food (think people) for the tree.
Ormyrr – I’d call this an aberration.
Phase Wasp – Ouch those magic missles sting… (Another bad pun)
Phoenix – D*** near unbeatable. Thank your lucky shoes this is NG. Of course if some evil DM decided there was an evil version…
Planetouched – Aren’t lawful and chaotic planetouched already covered?
Psurlon – An earthworm person. I’ll pass.
Ragewind – Another blender.
Raggamoffyn – This win the award for cutest name.
Rampager – A big strong thing that hates metal. Regard beware.
Reason Stealer- I eat intelligence. This would have starved on some people I know….
Red Sundew – I guess they had a plant quota?
Rogue Eidolon – These are freaky. I love the art.
Rukarazyll – They should just say this is from the Far Realms.
Runic Guardian – Shield Guardian 3000
Shadow Spider – Anything from the Plane of Shadows can’t be nice.
Sirine – Wins the award for 2nd cutest babe in the book. (See Sylph)
Spawn of Kyuss – Wormy undead.
Spell Weaver – I like the multi spellcasting ability.
Spellguant – Magic items beware
Spirit of the Land – This is a cool idea. Are your PCs not being ecofriendly?
Stone Spike – Is this a Chainmail monster?
Swamplight Lynx – Lynx were underrepresented.
Sylph – The winner of the Miss Monster Manual 2 crown.
Tempest – A intelligent thunderstorm. Cool concept, I wouldn’t want to fight it.
Teratomorph – Weird, just weird.
Thri-keen – Dark sun favorite
Twig Blight – From the Sunless Citadel
Vaporighu – From Gehenna and hungry
Windghost – Lovecraft-type monster
Wyste – Lovecraft-type monster
Yakfolk – Don’t underestimate the yakfolk they have some nice tricks up their sleeves.
Yugoloth – Nice to see the ferrymen here.
Templates
Captured One – For the Raggamoffyn ability
Chimeric – a bleh template for me.
Death Knight – Do I really need to comment on this one?
Half-Golem – I kinda of like this idea.
Monster of Legend – When you want to use a monster but need to bump up the CR. Great art.
Spellstitched – Undead + Magic = Pain
Tauric – This is so cool. Take X humanoid + X animal/beast/vermin and spit out a result.
Titanic – Titanic Badger anybody?
Warbeast – When the typical old Dire Badger won’t do for your gnome paladin whip out the Warbeast Dire Badger (O’ Doom)
OGC
Razor Boar – Don’t cross these in a forest or anywhere else.
Scorpionfolk – Isn’t this already covered by the Stingers?
Well that wraps it up. If you’d like a more specific/serious opinion I might try after I get some sleep. ;-) All in all I think the MM2 is a good book overall. But both the art and monsters are hit or miss.
Monsters
Abeil- My first reaction was “I already have lawful ant people why do I need lawful bee people?” However, after reading the entry I think I actually like these guys better. The soldiers Stormwing attack (6d6 in 40’ burst) just rocks. Plus they have better colors…
Ash Rat – Cool little monster, more amusing if they named it fire shrew…
Asperi – Skywalking cold subtype horses. Can I get one as a mount?
Automaton – Hey, Chainmail monsters! Nice to see lower CR constructs but where are the creation rules?
Avolakia- Lovecraft-type aberration. Their saving grace is their cool, “We maintain undead as moving food stock” routine.
Banshee – Save or die. You either love it or hate it.
Bladeling – Spiky goblin-like humanoids from Acheron. Seems bleh to me.
Blood Ape – Apes that can enlarge themselves to Huge size. The jungles got a bit more dangerous.
Boggle – They like to steal shiny objects. So this is like an ugly Kender?
Bogun – Vegetable constructs! For those that think Homunculi are icky.
Bone Naga – Look the dark naga got a new friend!
Bone Ooze – Gargantuan ooze with tons of bones floating inside it. Finally an ooze that will scare my PCs!
Braxat – A rhino/beetle with psionics?!? Umm… at least it hits hard.
Breathdrinker – It looks like you and steals the breath from your lungs. Cool monster, so-so art.
Bronze Serpent – A big scary bronze snake. Cool moster, cool art.
Catoblepas – I don’t know what the heck this thing is, but death rays from the eyes! Ouch!!!
Celestials – A satyr and a werewolf from Elysium. Useful for some planar ally.
Chain Golem – A personal favorite. It slices, it dices. It is a freaking moving blender!!!!
Chaos Roc – A colossal bird with prismatic spray. Don’t piss it off!
Cloaked Ape – Take a monkey and cross it with a flying squirrel.
Clockwork Horror – Their robots trying to take over the world. I like robots trying to take over the world. I can see an Electrum and the Adamantine Horrors reconstructing Pinky and the Brian
scenes.
Cloud Ray – BIG desert flying manta rays. So cool. If you’ve seen Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust you’ve seen these guys.
Corollax – A bright parrot that can do color spray. The first thing I thought of is a Bird of Paradise from Magic: the Gathering
Corpse Gatherer – An animated graveyard that seeks to gain more bodies. This sucker just has a lot of nasty potential.
Crisom Death – A favorite from 2E. But no mention of the possibility of this being a type of vampire that lost it’s physically body and survived.
Darktentacles – Is this where Evard got his inspiration?
Deathbringer – The undead general. His negative burst could be nasty with undead allies.
Demon – A bunch of chainmail monsters (Abyssal Maw) then some interesting demons. My favorite is the everburing Palrethees, a demon that failed his BATs (Balor Apptitude Test)?
Desmodu – Duna-duna-duna-duna! BATMAN! Sorry failed my Will
save.
Desmodu Bat – Big bats the Desmodu grow.
Devil – Cool wasp devil thingy in here, the rest aren’t shabby either.
Dinosaurs – Alright!!!! Plesiosaur, Allosaur, Ankylosaur, Quetzcoatlus, Seismosaur, and Spinosaur. Lost World here we come!
Dire Animal – Mostly stuff from Masters of the Wild
Gem Dragons – (Images of Amethyst telekinesising PCs, off walls, flash through head) Manical laughter follows. BADD will be happy.
Dread Guard – Also known as Stygian Warrior in Myth 2: Soulblighter
Dune Stalker – Desert Monster, bleh.
Effigy – Cool art. Don’t let this thing control you.
Elemental Weird – Seers rock!
Ehter Scarab – Ethereal vermin. whooppee…
Ethereal Doopleganger – Just like a material doopleganger, only ethereal…
Ethereal Slayer – Now this is an ethereal monster. Amubsh the PCs when they try to be sneaky and ethereal there way out of a problem.
Famine Spirit – Open up and say “Ahhhh!”
Felldrake – Chainmail monsters but cool ones.
Fiendwurm – One day I’m an earthworm but now I’m really big, have a portal to the Abyss in my gut, and REALLY bad heartburn. Unless you have some Bigby-sized Tums don’t bug me.
Fihyr – Look it’s a Feyr!
Firbolg – Another giant with big swords.
Fire Bats – “They propel themselves by expelling heated gases
from tubes within their bodies…” Not quite a flumph but getting there.
Flesh Jelly – A big blob o’ skin. Gross yet effective.
Fomorian – U – G – L –Y You don’t need no alibi, you ugly!
Forest Sloth – They aren’t slow and aren’t docile. Sloth is a misnomer here, think prehistoric sloth.
Frost Salamander – Ice lizards are cool… (pun intended)
Galeb Duhr – Another 2e favorite
Gamboi – Blue monkeys!
Giant – Mountain giants are big.
Glimmerskin – Pop goes the hero! Postive energy overload is
soooo amusing…
Golems – Stained glass, Brass, and Dragonflesh. Don’t let a dragon know you are making a dragonflesh golem.
Gravecrawler – A intelligent slug they turns flesh to stone and sees dead people. Interesting potential.
Gravog – a really big and hungry lemur?
Greevise – It’s a Venus flytrap gone bad.
Grell – They’re back…
Grimalkin – A shapeshifting cat with 8 Int. Do they still like catnip?
Grizzly Mastodon – More prehistoric fun.
Half-fiend, Durzagon – What happens when a duergar gets a succubus drunk.
Hellfire Wyrm – I’m thinking Shivan Dragon here. It’s from the
Nine Hells and would make a great campaign villain.
Hook Horror – Cool monster, so-so art.
Immoth - An ice giant, literally.
Ixitxachiti – How do you pronounce that?
Jahi – Possesion undead style!
Jermlaine – Awww, look at the wittle little evil thingys… (My fiance’s reaction)
Juggernaut – Now I know this is from Magic: the Gathering!
Julamus – More blue monkeys!!!!!!!
Kopru – Weird underwater monsters.
Leechwalker – Ugh, a ball of leeches in humanoid from.
Legendary Animals – More stuff from Masters of the Wild.
Leviathan – The whale that ate Pittsburgh…
Linnorms – A personal favorite fairy tale monster. These are large and in charge.
Loxo – An elephant-man. The desc. doesn’t match the art exactly.
Marrash – Looks like a Gnoll with wings.
Meenlock – Shudder- These used to be humans? Ouch.
Megalodon – Even more prehistoric fun.
Megapede – My fiancé hates these things.
Moonbeast – Lovecraft-type monster
Mooncalf – I think this is from a WotC adventure.
Moonrat – Rats that are intelligent during the full moon. The art for this speaks volumes.
Morkoth – An underwater aberration. Who’s arm is sticking out of it’s mouth?
Mudmaw – A croc with a weird mouth…
Myconid – Alright!!! Mushroom people!!!
Needlefolk – A plant person. Don’t squeeze the needlefolk.
Neogi – Spelljammer favorites.
Nethersight Mastiff – Because the shadow mastiffs weren’t enough.
Nightmare Beast – The name says it all.
Nimblewight- rapier-wielding constructs that hide among the living. Potential here.
Ocean Strider – A killer whale giant. Cool art.
Orcwort – Possibly my favorite monster from the book. It’s a tree that can move and make orc shaped “fruit” that goes out to grab some food (think people) for the tree.
Ormyrr – I’d call this an aberration.
Phase Wasp – Ouch those magic missles sting… (Another bad pun)
Phoenix – D*** near unbeatable. Thank your lucky shoes this is NG. Of course if some evil DM decided there was an evil version…
Planetouched – Aren’t lawful and chaotic planetouched already covered?
Psurlon – An earthworm person. I’ll pass.
Ragewind – Another blender.
Raggamoffyn – This win the award for cutest name.
Rampager – A big strong thing that hates metal. Regard beware.
Reason Stealer- I eat intelligence. This would have starved on some people I know….
Red Sundew – I guess they had a plant quota?
Rogue Eidolon – These are freaky. I love the art.
Rukarazyll – They should just say this is from the Far Realms.
Runic Guardian – Shield Guardian 3000
Shadow Spider – Anything from the Plane of Shadows can’t be nice.
Sirine – Wins the award for 2nd cutest babe in the book. (See Sylph)
Spawn of Kyuss – Wormy undead.
Spell Weaver – I like the multi spellcasting ability.
Spellguant – Magic items beware
Spirit of the Land – This is a cool idea. Are your PCs not being ecofriendly?
Stone Spike – Is this a Chainmail monster?
Swamplight Lynx – Lynx were underrepresented.
Sylph – The winner of the Miss Monster Manual 2 crown.
Tempest – A intelligent thunderstorm. Cool concept, I wouldn’t want to fight it.
Teratomorph – Weird, just weird.
Thri-keen – Dark sun favorite
Twig Blight – From the Sunless Citadel
Vaporighu – From Gehenna and hungry
Windghost – Lovecraft-type monster
Wyste – Lovecraft-type monster
Yakfolk – Don’t underestimate the yakfolk they have some nice tricks up their sleeves.
Yugoloth – Nice to see the ferrymen here.
Templates
Captured One – For the Raggamoffyn ability
Chimeric – a bleh template for me.
Death Knight – Do I really need to comment on this one?
Half-Golem – I kinda of like this idea.
Monster of Legend – When you want to use a monster but need to bump up the CR. Great art.
Spellstitched – Undead + Magic = Pain
Tauric – This is so cool. Take X humanoid + X animal/beast/vermin and spit out a result.
Titanic – Titanic Badger anybody?
Warbeast – When the typical old Dire Badger won’t do for your gnome paladin whip out the Warbeast Dire Badger (O’ Doom)
OGC
Razor Boar – Don’t cross these in a forest or anywhere else.
Scorpionfolk – Isn’t this already covered by the Stingers?
Well that wraps it up. If you’d like a more specific/serious opinion I might try after I get some sleep. ;-) All in all I think the MM2 is a good book overall. But both the art and monsters are hit or miss.
