Pineapple Sherbet
Okay so here's what you do.
Go to the store, and buy the ripest pineapple they have. Get some brown sugar and some heavy cream while you're there. On your way home, swing by the liquor store and get a small bottle of spiced rum (or a large bottle, I'm not your dad.)
When you get home, peel and core the pineapple, then cut it into chunks. You can put those peels and core into a glass gallon jar to make
tepache, but that's a different recipe.
Put the pineapple chunks in your food processor, and puree them until very smooth. Seriously, blend them way longer than you think you need to, and then blend them some more. Pineapple won't give up without a fight. Then pour it into a bowl. Stir in 1d3 tablespoons of brown sugar and a generous pour of rum. (About an ounce? Maybe less? You don't measure rum with measuring spoons, you measure it with your heart.)
Finally, stir in 1/3 cup heavy cream and immediately pour it into your ice cream freezer. This is the only part of the recipe where timing is critical: milk + acid = curdles, so you want to get it into the freezer right away. Freeze until soft set, then transfer to an airtight container and freeze completely.
Serves six (or one, if it's 100°F outside and you have the day off.)