Pineapple Express: Someone Is Wrong on the Internet?

[Snarf Zagyg]

@trappedslider

Snarf is your only friend
But not your only friend
But Snarf is a little glowing friend
But really I'm not actually anyone's friend


To quote The Count, TWO, TWO, TWO posts on this page that left me laughing and groaning in equal measure.

 

[Snarf Zagyg]

I am a computer geek. But apparently not the right kind of computer geek...

COBOL forever, AMIRITE?

 

[Cadence]

COBOL forever, AMIRITE?

Can we blame the COBOLds who saved us from global computer catastrophe excitement as we rolled into the year 2000 for everything bad that has happened since?

 

[Snarf Zagyg]

Can we blame the COBOLds who saved us from global computer catastrophe excitement as we rolled into the year 2000 for everything bad that has happened since?

True Fact: An alliance between Bards and Tucker's COBOLds pushed out the security update last week.

 

[trappedslider]

To quote The Count, TWO, TWO, TWO posts on this page that left me laughing and groaning in equal measure.

 

[Reynard]

My dude, you GOTTA start reading your posts before you hit send. You thumbs hate you.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

When I don't feel like just marking the texter's number as spam, what is a good reply? '"They died! Why can't you vultures go away?". "We would be happy to have <not our address sold>, can you drive by today in person?". Or...?

Besides the basics you’ve mentioned, I’ve tried using alternative languages, invitations to prayer, intimations that the number they’ve reached is involved with organized crime/national security/black ops, a faux cypher and so forth.

If it’s a voice call, I sometimes sing nonsense songs- “Space Hippos!” is a favorite- or engage in nonsequitors. If I’m certain I’m talking to a bot, I occasionally resort to profanity, and LOTS of it.

 

[Ryujin]

Besides the basics you’ve mentioned, I’ve tried using alternative languages, invitations to prayer, intimations that the number they’ve reached is involved with organized crime/national security/black ops, a faux cypher and so forth.

If it’s a voice call, I sometimes sing nonsense songs- “Space Hippos!” is a favorite- or engage in nonsequitors. If I’m certain I’m talking to a bot, I occasionally resort to profanity, and LOTS of it.

Occasionally I'll state my extreme interest in what they're selling, state that I need to turn off the stove, then just put my phone down and walk away from it for a half hour or so. At least however long they're waiting is time they aren't bothering someone else.

 

[Saracenus]

Peanut Butter soup is a real dish out of African cultures. I’m not aware of any cuisine that puts pimento & olives in mashed potatoes, or lauds off-color ham. And flat out lying about roast beef vsprime rib? C’mon, son!

(Also, BTW, at an expensive liberal arts college! )

Maybe context will help. When I was growing up my family got government (US) cheese and peanut butter, due to spiral inflation in the 70s food was super expensive, kinda like it is now. It would keep you fed but it wouldn't earn any awards for flavor or texture.

Cut to the 80s and I got into a collage I didn't think I could get into. It was very expensive to the point where my family and myself had to take out major loans for me to attend. We were not poor by government definitions but we did not have a great deal of cash on hand to afford collage for my 2 siblings and myself.

While the learning environment challenged me I was shocked at the poor quality of the food that our dinning hall had. I didn't understand the concept of the lowest bidder at the time. It felt like my public elementary school had better food.

The soups in our dinning hall were terrible as a whole. And yes I know that peanut soup is a cuisine in Africa, but the Peanut Butter soup that was served in that dining hall had nothing in common with that dish and only shared the name. What I am saying it was basically warmed up government peanut butter with some vegetable stock.

Sure, my culinary expectations were sadly high for my choice of college where my family was spending a lot of money to send me. And I was also experiencing flashbacks to the food struggles of my family that I had thought I was escaping.

So, C'mon son right back at ya.

 

[Saracenus]

COBOL forever, AMIRITE?

Plenty of work here in Oregon if you know COBOL because we still have government systems using it.