The Cake is a Lie - Seven Swords of Sin (Victim #1)

[Creamsteak]

Visions of pretty bubbles of pink and green float around you. Some of the bubbles are normal, round, but others take strange unfamiliar bubble-shapes. Some are pyramids. Some are cubes. Others still are the shape of swords and shields. Some take on very fine appearances, almost like faces. Strange smiling faces with two short horns on top. The heads spin, floating gently down, down past your feet.

The faces speak in a strange chorus. Their voice is feminine, but slightly monotone. Somewhat reassuring, but at the same time disconcerting.

"I'm sittin on the ceilin feelin down,
yeah, since she left my world turned upside down
now I really should get up but i'm too afraid of gettin down
and my mind is really reelin as i'm sittin on the ceilin feelin down."

"I'm just sittin here drinkin my cracklin rose
but every time I take a swig, you know, it dribbles up my nose
that's just the way it goes
when you're sittin on the ceilin feelin down
with nothin else to do but hang around."

"Oh, I just sit here
and choke back a tear
and do my best impression of a
chandelier
but wait..... now I see!
It's so clear to me....
the situations simply lost
its gravity."

"So i'm sittin on the ceilin feelin high.
I think i'll climb out the window and fall
up through the sky
at least I think i'll try
and there's nothin left to say
except bye bye."

The voice continues, just as strangely feminine and monotone at the same time.

"Test subject name here are you able to function? Test subject name here are you awake? You have completed the first test. Please move on to the next room."

You open your eyes looking up at a set of stairs behind you. A massive stone door seems to have been shut up at the top. As you slowly wake up, you become more aware of your surroundings. You are completely naked, no weapon or armor in hand. You are in an elegant room tiled with white marble on the floors, walls, and ceiling. A long raised trough running through the center of the floor contains a few feet of crystal-clear water and lazily swimming orange fish. A random assortment of small rugs and reed mats covers the floor near the southern wall.

"Consumption of fish type delta nine seven five nine may result in blood loss, diarhia, vomiting, loss of vision, hallucinations, and death. In rare cases, consumption of fish type delta nine seven nine have been associated with loss of appetite. Consume at your own risk."

On the opposite side of the room, away from the stairs, there is an simple wooden door.

 

[Nac Mac Feegle]

OOC: Do you have a bigger thumbnail, I'm having a hard time figuring out what's what on that map.

 

[Creamsteak]

I can re-draw it in excel if that helps slightly.

 

[Nac Mac Feegle]

Jostan rises, looking around blearily. After giving his head a moment to settle down, the warrior makes his way towards the wooden door, testing the handle gingerly. "Well Jostan, what have you gotten yourself into this time," he mutters.

 

[Creamsteak]

The door is unlocked, and not jammed.

 

[Nac Mac Feegle]

Jostan pulls the door open, wary for trouble from the other side.

 

[Creamsteak]

The door opens up into a hallway going to the right or the left. Sitting in front of you is a heavy wooden shield and a club, resting against the wall opposite the doorway. To the north, the walls remain marble. To teh south, you can see rough stone along that wall. Both directions seem to turn to the east (at least, to the best of your current senses).

Items in this Room
A wooden club.
A heavy wooden shield.

Exits
North
South
West

 

[Nac Mac Feegle]

Picking up club and shield, Jostan eyed his surroundings. Wherever he was, it was clearly not going to be a friendly place, so best to be prepared. Reflecting that whoever had made the shield had clearly intended for it to be worn over sleeves, he headed North.

OOC: AC 15 as of now.

 

[Creamsteak]

This small stone room is dominated at the north end by a massive pile of treasure. Gold coins spill from open coffers draped with fine silks and furs, and glowing swords stand propped up against barrels and crates holding gem-encrusted armor. Sitting gently upon an 18 inch diameter silver platter in the center of the display is the most incredibly moist and delicious chocolate cake to ever be created.

"Excellent Work."

"You've passed the second test with flying colors. Because of your record-breaking achievement in solving the complexities of the previous puzzle, here is your reward! In addition, we will be sending your *insert subjects family unit* on an all-expenses paid trip to *insert place here*."

Items
Cake
Treasure

Exits
East
West (origin)

 

[Nac Mac Feegle]

Jostan takes one look at the room and pulls an about face. One thing in life is sure, and that's that no one gives away free treasure. Careful not to turn his back on the room he edges back around the corner and makes a beeline for the Southern exit instead.