Thomas Shey
Legend
To me it depends. Are they asking or demanding?
I think there's a place in between those. Its the difference between "expecting" and "insisting" (which I think very much some people--and to make it clear, I don't mean you--in this thread have conflated). "Expecting" is "The thing I want here does not seem like it should cause a problem for the GM and other players from my understanding of both" wheras "insisting" is "My understanding of this is paramount and no pushback is acceptable". Unlike some in this thread, I do think a legitimate response is "This is a structural and look-and-feel thing I'm trying in my campaign and this doesn't work with that" is a legitimate response, but I also think that's worlds away from "I have to hyper-curate every single thing a player wants to introduce, and my default reaction is 'no'". The latter only makes sense if either the GM has no faith in his players' ability to assess what fits and doesn't at all, has what sure looks like an overly rigid view of what can fit (and I don't have any more respect for that than I do of players who have a completely inflexible view of their character), or just has bought into a picture of how all-power-eminates-from-the-GM that was tiresome a half century ago and is even more so now. That's why I've used those people (and to be clear, I don't think that's super common even among pretty trad GMs, but I have hit it) as examples of degenerate examples of the GM curation urge.


