Trying to be funny with insults
- Thread starter BlackSilver
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![:]](http://www.enworld.org/forum/images/smilies/devious.png "Devious :]")
Goobermunch
Explorer
Felix--
The problem is that many of those people you describe aren't really that quick. They just think they are.
See, if they were really as quick witted as they claim, they'd be able not only to compose the rapier jab, but also consider the likely emotional impact of their statement, and maybe exercise some discretion before they let fly, especially at someone who's already expressed a desire not to be the butt of such jokes.
Unless, of course, they're just mean. Then there's not much you can do for them. If they were a vicious dog, you could put them down, but the law frowns on doing that to people. Still, you can employ some of the same logic you'd use around a dog you know to be vicious--namely, avoid the areas the dog can be found.
Yours,
--G
The problem is that many of those people you describe aren't really that quick. They just think they are.
See, if they were really as quick witted as they claim, they'd be able not only to compose the rapier jab, but also consider the likely emotional impact of their statement, and maybe exercise some discretion before they let fly, especially at someone who's already expressed a desire not to be the butt of such jokes.
Unless, of course, they're just mean. Then there's not much you can do for them. If they were a vicious dog, you could put them down, but the law frowns on doing that to people. Still, you can employ some of the same logic you'd use around a dog you know to be vicious--namely, avoid the areas the dog can be found.
Yours,
--G
First,
Back at you - narcissist, mysogynist, etc. The issue is Blacksilver doesn't like to be teased.
Second,
The fact that both you folks seems to were your "pain" openly does make you an easy mark. Right, wrong or otherwise. If the fella picks solely on the two of you (making an assumption that you are in different groups), then he is, in all probabilty, being malicious. And then, a trip to the woodshed would be in order. However, it sounds as though the thinness of your skins is getting in the way of developing relationships with individuals who are not a "pained" as you.
Lastly,
This comparision is the proverbial apples and oranges. You correllate a physical attack on the defenseless with verbal interplay between friendly associates, if not friends. (Again, making an assumption here because I would not play in a campaign with people who were or who I did not want to be my friends). Additionally, what is a "professional bully?"
[edited for proper quote attribution]
Back at you - narcissist, mysogynist, etc. The issue is Blacksilver doesn't like to be teased.
Second,
and
The fact that both you folks seems to were your "pain" openly does make you an easy mark. Right, wrong or otherwise. If the fella picks solely on the two of you (making an assumption that you are in different groups), then he is, in all probabilty, being malicious. And then, a trip to the woodshed would be in order. However, it sounds as though the thinness of your skins is getting in the way of developing relationships with individuals who are not a "pained" as you.
Lastly,
This comparision is the proverbial apples and oranges. You correllate a physical attack on the defenseless with verbal interplay between friendly associates, if not friends. (Again, making an assumption here because I would not play in a campaign with people who were or who I did not want to be my friends). Additionally, what is a "professional bully?"
[edited for proper quote attribution]
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Desdichado
Hero
That depends on you, though. I've had plenty of real friends that attacked me with jokes and insults, which I returned in kind. Yet these were the people that I turn to in a pinch; people that will drop their entire Saturday to help me fix my garage door, or what have you. Don't be so restrictive in your definition of a "real friend." Not everyone is so thin-skinned. Our culture lately has had a radical and very odd redefinition recently of what is acceptable behavior to the point where it's extremely easy to play the role of the victimized martyr and actually get real sympathy instead of just rolled eyes anymore.Talon5 said:
I wouldn't guess as to his motives, if I were you. I also lost track of where you were going there at the end; are you saying you carry around raw emotion because you see too much? Or because he does? Please clarify.Talon5 said:
What an absolutely ridiculous non sequiter.Talon5 said:
There you go making wildly unsupported assumptions again; how do you know anyone here is a witty conversationalist? Or that any witty conversationalist would "have no clue that some people ... have no idea how to do such things?" It never helps to assign motives or positions to people if you haven't directly witnessed it yourself.Talon5 said:
See my comment above. Read it again.Talon5 said:
Why would you do that? The best solution is to sit down with him and talk about it, not come and get your daily dose of therapy from a bunch of message board faceless people. If he really is the jerk you make him out to be (the initial post doesn't bear this out, it seems) then this is the time to find that out and tell the guy that you have no interest in continuing an association with someone who is so clearly determined to be a jerk.Talon5 said:
That's an odd position to take in a thread about hurtful comments at the game table.Talon5 said:
BlackSilver
First Post
Stop- Please
Stop
Stop
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BlackSilver
First Post
Stop
Please, stop.
I wanted only thoughts on what I should do, I have an avenue that I will try this weekend.
You have all made very good points, and I thank you for them, but I would rather you all got along in some measure. Obviously some of us are not as capable at taking this kind of abuse- Talon5 as an example seems to have taken more then he can handle and the individual that he speaks of obviously knows what "buttons" to push and sees a weakness in him so that individual goes after him- that does not make a true friend.
Thank you, now- please- stop your harmful statements and let us return to gaming discussion.
Please, stop.
I wanted only thoughts on what I should do, I have an avenue that I will try this weekend.
You have all made very good points, and I thank you for them, but I would rather you all got along in some measure. Obviously some of us are not as capable at taking this kind of abuse- Talon5 as an example seems to have taken more then he can handle and the individual that he speaks of obviously knows what "buttons" to push and sees a weakness in him so that individual goes after him- that does not make a true friend.
Thank you, now- please- stop your harmful statements and let us return to gaming discussion.
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BlackSilver said:
Sorry
BlackSilver said:
Me too. Unfortunately it seems taht some people just don't get- sorry, rambling again.
BlackSilver said:
I have known him for fifteen years, and like him a lot. I am the best friend that I can be to him, and have spoken to him on a number of occasions, but it just doesn't seem to sink in.
BlackSilver said:
Okay.
I am sorry for destroying your thread BlackSilver. Good luck.
Blacksilver, if you meant to end this thread, then I am sorry for continuing it, otherwise...
You really need to figure out how much of a friend this person is.
I have engaged in the sort of friendly social sparring that has been refered to and it can be great fun. However, I also have sufficient social skills to realize when it isn't appropriate (some hard learning there). Just because some people like to do it doesn't mean that EVERYONE likes to. People may call it being thinned skinned or overly sensitive or whatever, and it may even be true, but a real friend (TM) doesn't take advantage of a friend's weak points. Once you have told him you don't appreciate his jokes, that is his cue as a friend that he has stepped over the bounds and he needs to adjust.
Needless to say, I would have alot of questions to ask to properly address your specific situation: How long have you known each other? Do his jokes step into the personal? Does he verbally spar with the other players? Are the comments in game (directed at characters) or out of game (directed at players)? Is he only this way at the table or is it also when doing things away from the game? How does he handle it when things come back his way?
From my own personal experience, once you have let someone know they are stepping on your boundaries and they continue to do it, then they aren't really friends. Friends (or even socially balanced people) understand that you don't treat everyone the same and that forcing your 'style' of friendship on someone is inappropriate, to say the least.
It is good that you have a course of action and I hope it works for you. If you could post how it goes, I for one would like to see how it was handled and if it worked, since I rather expect I will have to deal with this sort of person in the future.
You really need to figure out how much of a friend this person is.
I have engaged in the sort of friendly social sparring that has been refered to and it can be great fun. However, I also have sufficient social skills to realize when it isn't appropriate (some hard learning there). Just because some people like to do it doesn't mean that EVERYONE likes to. People may call it being thinned skinned or overly sensitive or whatever, and it may even be true, but a real friend (TM) doesn't take advantage of a friend's weak points. Once you have told him you don't appreciate his jokes, that is his cue as a friend that he has stepped over the bounds and he needs to adjust.
Needless to say, I would have alot of questions to ask to properly address your specific situation: How long have you known each other? Do his jokes step into the personal? Does he verbally spar with the other players? Are the comments in game (directed at characters) or out of game (directed at players)? Is he only this way at the table or is it also when doing things away from the game? How does he handle it when things come back his way?
From my own personal experience, once you have let someone know they are stepping on your boundaries and they continue to do it, then they aren't really friends. Friends (or even socially balanced people) understand that you don't treat everyone the same and that forcing your 'style' of friendship on someone is inappropriate, to say the least.
It is good that you have a course of action and I hope it works for you. If you could post how it goes, I for one would like to see how it was handled and if it worked, since I rather expect I will have to deal with this sort of person in the future.
Gort
Explorer
This thread is now about how a REAL pirate fights!
This is the END for you, you gutter-crawling cur!
And I've got a little TIP for you, get the POINT?
Soon you'll be wearing my sword like a shish kebab!
First you better stop waiving it like a feather-duster.
My handkerchief will wipe up your blood!
So you got that job as janitor, after all.
People fall at my feet when they see me coming.
Even BEFORE they smell your breath?
I once owned a dog that was smarter then you.
He must have taught you everything you know.
You make me want to puke.
You make me think somebody already did.
Nobody's ever drawn blood from me and nobody ever will.
You run THAT fast?
You fight like a dairy farmer.
How appropriate. You fight like a cow.
I got this scar on my face during a mighty struggle!
I hope now you've learned to stop picking your nose.
Have you stopped wearing diapers yet?
Why, did you want to borrow one?
I've heard you were a contemptible sneak.
By the way, Talon 5 is so goth he sh;ts bats.
You're no match for my brains, you poor fool.
I'd be in real trouble if you ever used them.
You have the manners of a beggar.
I wanted to make sure you'd feel comfortable with me.
I'm not going to take your insolence sitting down!
Your haemorrhoids are flaring up again, eh?
There are no words for how disgusting you are.
Yes there are. You just never learned them.
I've spoken with apes more polite then you.
I'm glad to hear you attended your family reunion.
I thank you.
This is the END for you, you gutter-crawling cur!
And I've got a little TIP for you, get the POINT?
Soon you'll be wearing my sword like a shish kebab!
First you better stop waiving it like a feather-duster.
My handkerchief will wipe up your blood!
So you got that job as janitor, after all.
People fall at my feet when they see me coming.
Even BEFORE they smell your breath?
I once owned a dog that was smarter then you.
He must have taught you everything you know.
You make me want to puke.
You make me think somebody already did.
Nobody's ever drawn blood from me and nobody ever will.
You run THAT fast?
You fight like a dairy farmer.
How appropriate. You fight like a cow.
I got this scar on my face during a mighty struggle!
I hope now you've learned to stop picking your nose.
Have you stopped wearing diapers yet?
Why, did you want to borrow one?
I've heard you were a contemptible sneak.
By the way, Talon 5 is so goth he sh;ts bats.
You're no match for my brains, you poor fool.
I'd be in real trouble if you ever used them.
You have the manners of a beggar.
I wanted to make sure you'd feel comfortable with me.
I'm not going to take your insolence sitting down!
Your haemorrhoids are flaring up again, eh?
There are no words for how disgusting you are.
Yes there are. You just never learned them.
I've spoken with apes more polite then you.
I'm glad to hear you attended your family reunion.
I thank you.
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