Will said:Me, in those situations, I'd say the benefits of VoP are lost until the character has Atonement cast upon him.
And, if it was breaking a vow for a really really good reason, the Atonement would be something pretty simple:
And that is how I think it should be done too.
It was a role-playing decision and it was a player deciding not to be selfish (I've played with players who chosse to let the entire pary die just so they would not lose xp in the old 2nd ed dula classing rules - talk about hard-feeling with the remaining players).
I don't think a player should be "penalized" for being a good team mate.
But I think it should be along the lines of the player "thinks" his is giving up is VoP benefits by doing this act and then the DM allows an easy atonement for said choice. I would not allow it if the player "knew" that it wasn't really a sacrifice.
An example of having a player make a hard choice but still have it work out:
I was running a game with a player running a paladin (2nd ed with a campaign specific CG paladin - Birthright setting). We were running his paladin's quest for his mount (a solo mini-adventure).
His "sister" was in dnager and his "leige" was also in danger. He could either save hsi sister, which would cause the "rightful heir to the kingdom" to perish and allow the "evil" ursurper to remain in power as ruler or he could he save the leige and allow his sister to die.
If he had chosen to save is sister he would have gained a normal war horse as his mount, and the the ruler would have died. But he chose to make the personal sacrifice by sacrificing family for the greater good. This ended up yieldiing him a griffon mount, which subsequently allowed him to "save" both. The player did not know this when he made his choice so it was truely dramatic and a lot of tension.