Well, this seems a good place for the use of that "tl;dr" thing. So apologies if any of this has been said before...
But to the original title of the thread, my feeling is the "REAL reason 5e can't unite the base" (which I will maintain hope that it can/will, to a degree!) has nothing to do with which edition one prefers or generalist mages, specialist fighters, skills or feats, or lions and tigers and bears.
It is a (or
the) core perception each individual one has of Dungeons & Dragons. It goes to how one approaches the game. The "crunch v. fluff". The character "build v. create". Is the game a "mathematical one viewed as a series of numbers and equations and feat choices that makes me duh bestest to win!" or is it a game that's "creative and imaginative that makes me what I envisioned to exist in this world and grow the story?"
There's no right or wrong here. There's only preference and perception. Yes, generational considerations may apply. Which edition you were introduced to D&D with may apply. Whether you are a more "left-brained" or "right-brained" person may apply. Whether you were a computer programmer or literature major may apply. But all of those considerations boil down to how you perceive/approach the game and what you expect out of the game experience...the
why you want to play?
The fluffernutters will never want the crunch to impede on their imaginations, disrupt their immersion or limit their options. The crunchybits will never want the fluff to interfere with their numbers or displace their immersion or limit their options. And BOTH sides will always aver that their preference(s) gives them MORE options, more versatility and an overall "better/kewler/bestest" experience...the problem there is that very few ever take into consideration that "better" is completely subjective...more appropriately stated as "more enjoyable
for me."
Compromise is certainly the way to go. It's a diplomatic nightmare, of course. lol. And as at least a few have noted, that means that not everyone gets everything they want. Again, this is a perceptional concern...an approach/view to the game. Some people (of
any age/edition/preferences!) simply believe they are entitled to have everything the way they want...RIGHT NOW! Others believe they are entitled to everything the way they want...like/cuz it was always like that.
People want D&D to be Burger King, I need to have it MY way, right away...and no one should tell me otherwise or take away my bacon double cheeseburger. (mmmm...bacon double cheeseburger...)
In the end, however, D&D is McDonalds (or if you prefer, a Wendy's or KFC or whatever your fast food of choice is). They do what they do, whether you think it good or ill, and they are enjoyed by those looking for a McDonalds!
It will give you
their menu...not yours or mine or someone else's. 1) You can choose to eat there, or not, in the first place. 2) Pick something that you think you will like and 3) enjoy it for what it is (all the greasy saltiness of a McDonalds. mmmm. So good when that McDonalds craving hits).
OR you can do 1 and 2 and then sit around saying "I wish we'd gone to KFC or I wanted Popeye's [Long John Silvers, Roy Rogers, whatever]. McDonald's sucks!" In which case, then I'd say, DON'T go to McDonalds in the first place!
The arguments over this 3e mechanic or that 4e mechanic are completely justifiable preferences to have...but they are just that. A preference. A
perceived "better" for your game. (all proclamations that Xor Y mechanic, playstyle, game system, design "evolution", etc. etc. is objectively "better" aside. Because saying it a million times STILL does not make it Truth..simply "True
for me/
from my perspective")
The real reason we won't be united is because not everyone comes at the game from a mechanical perspective (or desire for certain mechanics at all!). Not everyone comes at it from an imaginative perspective. Not everyone wants to use pencil and paper in today's day and age. Not everyone wants to have to use a computer, either. Not everyone wants hairy-footed halflings or half-orcs. Not everyone wants dragonborn or eladrin (gods ANYthing but the eladrin!

)...Etc. etc. ad infinitum.
The real reason is how people approach (what they want out of) the table before they're ever even there or pulling out their dice (hells, some people don't even want to be bothered with dice!).
And that is regrettable...but I feel, something of D&D's own making and all too accurate.
STILL, I'll hold out hope for compromise and maturity and mutual enjoyment for all. But to get there, we have to let go of [at least some of] our personal perceptions of "Xe or Y mechanic [or class or race or skill or whatever] is the bestest!"...be able to recognize that [everything about] MY D&D is not the twue way.
Cheers...now where's my bloody bacon double?...
--SD