D&D 5E Give me your craziest, most GONZO PC concepts!

Zardnaar said:

A mounted halfing with the mounted feat using 2 lances they RAW can dual wield.

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Mallus said:

You rang? (sorry for the delay - was observing a period of mourning for the New York Giants after getting smoked by the Packers).

My most gonzo PC was created for a Mutants and Masterminds campaign. I played him for a couple of years.

Name: Joséirus, the Egyptian God of Mexican Wrestling (or Wrestlers).

Real Name: José Pacifico Juan-Maria Ramirez. Age 14 1/2.

Birthplace: East L.A. Currently living in Empire City on the East Coast, attending the Empire Valley Institute of Learning.

Joséirusis is the current incarnation of the ancient Egyptian god of Mexican wrestling. He is a master of the "Seven Souls Wrestling" of the Meso-Egyptian pantheon. His signature moves include the Cheops Drop (which summons a pyramid out of thin air and drops it on opponents), the Nile-Driver (which causes a poison-snake infested cube of Nile river water to materialize around a target's head), the Khonsuplex (a "hold" that nullifies the target's superpowers), and the Nut-Buster (a prayer to the sky-goddess Nut asking her to pick the target up and drop them from an enormous height).

José can also summon the Chariot of Ra, a horseless war-chariot made of fire that flies "as fast as a fast sports car". With the help his tag-team partner Epic (an ancient Greece-themed brick known for hitting girls) he would deliver the Lariat of Ra, which was José nullifying a villain's powers and then Epic punching the Hell out of them.

Origin: José was a completely normal Latino boy who played way too much Pokemon on his Nintendo DS until the day the spirit of his ancient ancestor appeared before him and told him he was a god and should fight crime.

Which of course was utter nonsense. The "ancient spirit" was actually José's distant descendent, a bored post-human humantiies grad student from the 41st century named RAMirez who had access to a) 41st century designer drugs, b) friends with a time machine, and c) a prototype reality-hacking device. RAMirez applied a series of "cheat mods" to José code in his current universe-instance. In theory this was part of an experiment to demonstrate the "Ontological Burn-In Hypothesis", AKA, the "Fake It Until You Make It Principle". In practice, it was because RAMirez and his cronies were bored.

So they went around in the past and created fake gods and mythological creatures using super-science to see if they eventually became "real" at some point in the timeline. Other examples of these fake deities include Vespa, the Roman Goddess of Motor-Scooters, Hello Savior! (by Sanrio), El Diablo Robotico, and José's nemesis, Juannubis.

The best part about José's powers is that the wrestling is entirely fake. He doesn't know how to wrestle, at all. He's physically average, except for being a bit quick. When he uses his powers, it looks like a really crudely animated video game, with Joséirus usually flying up to a target, slapping at them, and then the effect techno-magically just happening.

Crowning Moments of WTF?!: In his first outing, José threw a cut-rate Cthulhu into low-earth orbit. Later, fought the Hulk on a plane (in "Hulks on a Plane!"). Once, he put a bespoke sombrero on the Sphinx and accidentally summoned the Robot Devil. In his last adventure, he stole the Spear of Loginus from Hitler's office in 1945 (o he could give it to the Pope as a gift), causing the Nazis to win WW2.

Did I mention Joséirus was a devout Catholic? He went to confession regularly, usually flying into the Empire City Cathedral on his fire-chariot. The GM strongly hinted José would eventually be canonized, thus becoming the Saint of Ancient Egyptian Mexican Wrestlers).

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Mallus said:

You rang? (sorry for the delay - was observing a period of mourning for the New York Giants after getting smoked by the Packers).

My most gonzo PC was created for a Mutants and Masterminds campaign. I played him for a couple of years.

Name: Joséirus, the Egyptian God of Mexican Wrestling (or Wrestlers).

Real Name: José Pacifico Juan-Maria Ramirez. Age 14 1/2.

Birthplace: East L.A. Currently living in Empire City on the East Coast, attending the Empire Valley Institute of Learning.

Joséirusis is the current incarnation of the ancient Egyptian god of Mexican wrestling. He is a master of the "Seven Souls Wrestling" of the Meso-Egyptian pantheon. His signature moves include the Cheops Drop (which summons a pyramid out of thin air and drops it on opponents), the Nile-Driver (which causes a poison-snake infested cube of Nile river water to materialize around a target's head), the Khonsuplex (a "hold" that nullifies the target's superpowers), and the Nut-Buster (a prayer to the sky-goddess Nut asking her to pick the target up and drop them from an enormous height).

José can also summon the Chariot of Ra, a horseless war-chariot made of fire that flies "as fast as a fast sports car". With the help his tag-team partner Epic (an ancient Greece-themed brick known for hitting girls) he would deliver the Lariat of Ra, which was José nullifying a villain's powers and then Epic punching the Hell out of them.

Origin: José was a completely normal Latino boy who played way too much Pokemon on his Nintendo DS until the day the spirit of his ancient ancestor appeared before him and told him he was a god and should fight crime.

Which of course was utter nonsense. The "ancient spirit" was actually José's distant descendent, a bored post-human humantiies grad student from the 41st century named RAMirez who had access to a) 41st century designer drugs, b) friends with a time machine, and c) a prototype reality-hacking device. RAMirez applied a series of "cheat mods" to José code in his current universe-instance. In theory this was part of an experiment to demonstrate the "Ontological Burn-In Hypothesis", AKA, the "Fake It Until You Make It Principle". In practice, it was because RAMirez and his cronies were bored.

So they went around in the past and created fake gods and mythological creatures using super-science to see if they eventually became "real" at some point in the timeline. Other examples of these fake deities include Vespa, the Roman Goddess of Motor-Scooters, Hello Savior! (by Sanrio), El Diablo Robotico, and José's nemesis, Juannubis.

The best part about José's powers is that the wrestling is entirely fake. He doesn't know how to wrestle, at all. He's physically average, except for being a bit quick. When he uses his powers, it looks like a really crudely animated video game, with Joséirus usually flying up to a target, slapping at them, and then the effect techno-magically just happening.

Crowning Moments of WTF?!: In his first outing, José threw a cut-rate Cthulhu into low-earth orbit. Later, fought the Hulk on a plane (in "Hulks on a Plane!"). Once, he put a bespoke sombrero on the Sphinx and accidentally summoned the Robot Devil. In his last adventure, he stole the Spear of Loginus from Hitler's office in 1945 (o he could give it to the Pope as a gift), causing the Nazis to win WW2.

Did I mention Joséirus was a devout Catholic? He went to confession regularly, usually flying into the Empire City Cathedral on his fire-chariot. The GM strongly hinted José would eventually be canonized, thus becoming the Saint of Ancient Egyptian Mexican Wrestlers).

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Mallus said:

José's nemesis, Juannubis.

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Mallus said:

You rang?

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