Disruptive players how long?

[the Jester]

Wait, is this a trick question or troll? Weren't you the guy arguing that if you limit who you game with, you're segregating yourself?

Previously you said that you don't run games for friends, but so that people will have a game. I don't see how this squares up with kicking someone out of your group.

 

[Umbran]

Depends upon what you call "disruptive". There's, "make out of game comments a little too often and maybe hog spotlight a bit too much," and then there's, "absolute jerk who treats fellow players like dirt."

How long I'll tolerate something, and how much leeway I'm willing to give for the player to self-correct, depends on exactly what the behavior is.

I don't think it is wrong for players to address it lightly, "Dude, could you put away your iPad and pay attention?" And sometimes there's a relationship between the players that may make it best for one of them to handle it. But ultimately, I think addressing such concerns is the GM's responsibility.

 

[Oryan77]

If they are disruptive at the first session, I'll cross my fingers and hope they will adjust more to the groups style of playing. If they are still disruptive at the second session, I'll let it be known that I don't like what they are doing. If they continue to be disruptive any sessions after I've already let it be known that I'm annoyed, then I start to talk to them via email and suggest that maybe they should leave if they can't change their ways.

I don't always blame them though. My DMing style may not be enjoyable to some players. My DMing style may annoy them just as much as they annoy me. But I'd rather them leave than have them stay and be irritating. Sometimes they won't leave on their own and they stay and complain all the time. That's when I have to stop inviting them.

 

[Crazy Jerome]

It very much depends. Not only on the what the person is doing and whether the game is even an appropriate place to deal with it, but also whether I'm willing and able to deal with it.

Look, by nature I'm one of those guys that likes to "fix things," to make things right, etc. By experience, I'm the opposite. I've learned that in practice, "fix" is often "meddle very counter-productively." So there are some fairly serious things that might set other people off, but I can deal with, and I'm willing to deal with it. So I do. On balance, I think this instance might turn out well. And then there are other times, like when the mostly normal guy wouldn't quit cheating. That just sets off so many buttons with me (and our group), we were not willing to deal with it. So he did not get invited back.

We aren't laying down any kind of marker that says any behavior worse than that gets you banned. We are saying that if you bring disruptive behavior to the table and are depending on our good nature and/or abilities to handle it, you better feel lucky ...

 

[shadzar]

Wait, is this a trick question or troll? Weren't you the guy arguing that if you limit who you game with, you're segregating yourself?

Previously you said that you don't run games for friends, but so that people will have a game. I don't see how this squares up with kicking someone out of your group.

I didn't say I didn't play games with friends, just currently that isn't possible. Many people DO only play games with friends, so, YES I did say they are segregating themselves from a wider view of the gaming populace.

That has nothing to do with this question. This question is NO MATTER WHO YOU GAME WITH FRIENDS OR STRANGERS, how long will you put up with one of them as a disruptive player?

So those that only play with friends, can very easily have a friend that is a disruptive player, just like those who play with strangers. The two are NOT exclusive, but this problem is inclusive of both types of players/DMs.

When you try to mix unrelated topics or threads, it can lead to understandable confusion.

Depends upon what you call "disruptive".

That isn't anything the question has want to, or is trying to define for individuals. Part of the question then must be what each individual answering feels is disruptive. As various things have various limits with people.

So no one must feel they have to agree what is disruptive, just answer away at what you feel the length of time something YOU consider to be disruptive would be tolerated, even if those disruptive things have different toleration levels and lengths of acceptance.

 

[steeldragons]

That has nothing to do with this question. This question is NO MATTER WHO YOU GAME WITH FRIENDS OR STRANGERS, how long will you put up with one of them as a disruptive player?

Ok, well, I think people's points about what constitutes "disruptive" are valid.

It takes a few sessions to discern a pattern of behavior...everyone's entitled a "bad day."

So, to the question at hand, there has to be at least several sessions before I'd be willing to have a chat.

That's the first line of defense, as it were. You can't just summarily boot someone without bringing their behavior to to the player first.

If you have a sincere and honest discussion out of game, and the behavior continues, then you are left with little choice but to tell them they are no longer welcome.

I would NOT put up with the behavior for longer than a couple of sessions especially if the other players are as put off/irritated as I am. So there is the "players talk to him first" and then the DM talks to him...and then...3rd strike he/she's out.

OR, you could just have a cohesive, "whole group" discussion first. They will probably be made to feel that they're "being ganged up on"...which, well, yeah, they are. Because the behavior is THAT unacceptable.

I also agree with everything Kitsune said. If the players don't know what is acceptable or not bevious BEFORE you sit down, then it is much more difficult to do this.

However, bottom line is, the game is THE GAME, it is everyone at that table. And if one person is throwing off the FUN of the experience for everyone else...then yeah, they need to go.

I'd say...a month (depending on how often you game, let's assume 2-3 times/month) to discern the behavior. One or two conversations...if the behavior continues...the boot should be...no longer than 2 months in...otherwise you're looking at possibly loosing your non-disruptive players.

Never had to do this, so just working off of premises/beliefs for a "good gaming experience". Take the two coppers for what they're worth.

Good luck and happy undisrupted gaming.
--Steel Dragons

 

[pogre]

Folks here are a lot more generous than me. If I classify a player as disruptive I usually boot them quickly. I'm very direct in telling them. My line usually is - Your playing style and how you enjoy the game does not match well with our group.

 

[DumbPaladin]

Folks here are a lot more generous than me. If I classify a player as disruptive I usually boot them quickly. I'm very direct in telling them. My line usually is - Your playing style and how you enjoy the game does not match well with our group.

Sometimes, it really is as simple as that. I suppose, to a group of people who want to do nothing but roll play, and have 8-hour combats, a player that wants to spend time on character development could be construed as "disruptive" to the group mind.

We've had 2 problematic players in our 2-year group history that I would classify as "disruptive". They got multiple warnings, and the fastest any one of them got kicked out was 4 months after the behavior first came to light.

 

[karlindel]

It depends on the disruptive behavior, and how much it bothers me and/or other players and the GM. Different game groups have different levels of disruption that is acceptable.

I have played in beer and pretzels style games in which plenty of table talking took place. I have been in other games where the players preferred to stay in character most of the time, and felt that more than a little table talk got in the way of the game.

I have, however, found that generally people wait longer than they should to deal with disruptive players. I had a player in one of my campaigns that was on the edge many times (played a borderline evil character when I had made it clear from the start that no evil characters were allowed, talked down to other players, made a big deal about basic party decisions), and I spoke to him several times about his behavior, and when I spoke with them they would improve for awhile, but then slid back into bad habits. Eventually, I had to ask him to leave, and I wish I had done it sooner.

 

[Bleys Icefalcon]

The problem usually takes care of itself

In my experience, the other gamers finally get sick of it, and THEY turn on the offending player. Either that, or they approach you and tell you they aren't coming anymore until the offending player is either gone, or changes their ways.

Just last weekend we had a player who has a long history of refusing to role play, or when he did, was very selfish oriented (at the time was playing a Ranger -asking for money from the other players to track, etc) anyway, he got knocked unconscious in the town and the rest decided to leave him in the street for the city guard to find.