And again you don’t speak for everyone. You speak for a minority.
How do you define minority? I'm not being a jerk here, but it's a serious question. As we've seen from 5e, there was a massive market for "D&D" that 4e wasn't filling. There were people who never chose to play 4e, and instead kept playing 3e. There were people that transitioned to PF. There were people that hadn't been playing D&D (or were playing TSR versions), and instead of playing 4e, kept not playing D&D until 5e. There were people that bought 4e, tried it (thus accounting for the initial sales) and then gave up.
And there were a lot of people that just never played 4e at all, and weren't attracted to the game.
What are those numbers? I don't know. You don't either. Maybe we'll get a better grasp on the actual metrics when Ben Riggs publishes his book, and instead of including the numbers, puts them in twitter posts (heh).
I think that the major issue is that most of the people are talking past each other, as usual. I go back to my idea that there is a difference between a game that is well-designed, and a game that is well-designed as a broadly popular D&D game. I don't think that the two things are the same.
It's perfectly acceptable to love 4e for what it was- a great game. It's also perfectly acceptable to understand that the designers blew through a lot of red flags during the design process; I had previously recounted how, during the initial playtest for 3PP developers, Paizo knew that 4e would be divisive, and it gave them the confidence to go forward with PF. What Riggs has added is that this shouldn't have been a surprise; some of the developers also knew that it would be divisive, and they tried to sound the alarm (and were ignored).
It's an academic question at this point- again, there were a lot of collateral issues that happened - from marketing, to the economy, to replacing the OGL, to telling people in the core books that there was one way to play (yeah, get a battlemap and minis). But there was always a tension between designing a game and designing for a brand- it's the same tension that you see in product. And it's why we still see the interminable battles over the same issues.
It's fine to love 4e. It's fine to not love 4e. In many ways, it was a great experiment, and I think it informed (for better or worse) the more careful and gradual approach that WoTC has taken since.