Combat Refluxes: The PC, as a strange by-product of acid reflux disease, may burp, belch, or grumble in order to make an acid-based ranged touch attack that causes 1d4 points of acid damage, plus 1 additional point for every 4 character levels. An opponent must be within melee combat range for the PC to use this attack.
Shields Proficiency: You are proficient with any person with the surname of Shields (ala Brooke Shields).
And, since spells have been metioned, then here's a few items out of the skill/feat category:
Bongsword: Any person, whether the sword's wielder, allies, or opponents, who breathes in the fumes emitted from this +1 smoking longsword, and fails a Fort save (DC 15) suffers the affects of a confusion spell. Also, the victim's appetite increases, and hios or her speech has an amazingly high usage of the word "man." Some legends speak of a double-bladed bongsword, with twice as potent powers.
Fish: This potent 9th-level spell, once cast, creates any type of fish-related spell effect. The caster may turn anyone into a fish of any size (fish only--no aquatic mammals, reptiles, or crustaceans allowed), bury an opponent under a pile of fish, have any sort of item created from whole fish, etc. Typically this spell creates bass or haddock, but any sort of fish (bony or cartilege) may be produced by the spell.
Power Word: Thrill This potent spell induces feelings of thrill in the target. Its primary use is to boost the morale of inept, underactive party members.
Power Word: Shun: This spell, once uttered, causes everyone within listening distance to shun the target character. All affected by the spell will deem the target character as strange, weird, or just generally unacceptable company to be around.
Thrill Touch: This low-level spell is frequently used by romantic professionals (or professional romantics).
Can'ttrip: The benefactor of this 0-level spell is immune to any sort of tripping manuever while under the duration of this spell.
Grease: This powerful 1st-level spell is capable of creating an entire rock musical based during the hey-day of 1950's high school culture. . . .
Char Person: This 1st level spell causes 1d6 fire damage to the target until they have a smoky, charred appearance.
Werehammer: This unfortunate victim, under the light of the full moon, transforms into a simple hammer. The poor victim will not return to normal until the next morning, and will typically feel like they were gripped by the legs and had their forehead slammed against various objects (with the appropriate bruises).
Gratesword: This enchanted +1 cheese bane greatsword gains a +5 bonus against all forms of cheese and objects made of cheese.
Cattleaxe: This enchanted +1 bovine bane battle axe gains a +5 bonus against all bovine or bovine-appearing creatures, such as cattle, gorgons, and minotaurs.
